Now How Did That Happen?
by obsidians
Summary: Sookie with a baby? Can Eric really be the father?
1. Chapter 1

Now How Did That Happen?

Decided that I was sick of writing Lust and had the concept of this new series come to me late last night. Obsidian

Yes, the wind was atrocious last night fellow Ontarion. My beer froze 

******

I was taken by those still loyal to the Queen and tortured for being a traitor. Spirited out of the country, I was locked in a jail cell in which everything was silver plated with silver bars. Every night for two weeks I suffered at the hands of those that wished to break me while bound by silver chains. My skin was removed with silver knives each night only to grow back slowly and painfully. I was not allowed to sleep and was watched over by weres during the day that were hired for this purpose. I was beaten with hammers until my bones were little more then shattered to dust, shot, stabbed and even threatened with rape until I almost wanted to beg for final death. I fed only on rats that I caught who were attracted by the smell of blood. When she led them to me (herself feeling and agony of my tortures) I was little more then a chittering demented, stinking thing who had almost succumbed to madness.

It was she that helped me to kill my tormentors. It was she that helped get me home with aid of the others. It was she that helped me shower and in whose arms I finally fell asleep in for the first time in weeks. As I drifted away from the pain with her warm body pressed to mine, she whispered into my damaged ear "I have you; you are safe"

Pam arranged with the shifter for time off so that she might stay with me. My physically healing only took a few days as I constantly had blood poured down my throat (true blood and as much of her own she felt safe to giving) like a human does chicken soup by my very demanding nurse. But emotionally healing took longer, I would awake ready to spring at my captures only to feel soft hands stroking me tenderly.

On the last day before we both had to returned to our normal lives, I finally told her the only thing that kept me going; that I loved her. She told me that she loved me too and then we made love.

I thought that I would be able to pursue our relationship after so much time wasted, but then fate sought to divide us again. The King sent me to oversee an important project of his. She cried the night before I left and asked me not to go. I told her I would be back in only a matter of day. I was wrong.

I am standing in front of Sookie's, My Beloveds house for the first time in over a year. I can hear her humming and singing inside her house and feel like for the first time I am home.

I knocked on the door; she answered and said "Eric" in a voice so soft that it sounded like a prayer. But then seemed conflicted about something, then Sam, The Shifter stepped up beside her holding a baby.

"Who is it?" he asked jostling the tiny bundle gently.

I could only stare at the innocuous looking yellow blanket smattered with ponies from which tiny pink fists pumped and felt like I had been dashed with cold water. I had lost her and all she could do was stare at me with a guarded expression.

I looked at Sam, who for all that I dislike about his kind, I know to be a man of honour and said "congratulations, please take care of her." I kissed a stunned Sookie on the cheek and turned to leave her for the last time.

I was really surprised when Sam grabbed the back of my jacket and pulled me back "Eric stop being a jackass and get in here." I allowed him to draw me into the house. He gestured to me to sit beside Sookie on the couch, who now held the baby.

I had heard about Sam's famous lectures, but have never witnessed one in person. His hair seemed to crackle and he started to pace. "Eric, Sookie, I am sick to death of you acting like a pair of particularly horny rabbit chasing each other around."

Sookie went to make a comment, but he silenced her with a look.

"Sookie, I don't know what insane agreement you made with Niall, but a man has a right to know about his own child" with that he took the baby from her and put it into my arms. I instinctively cradled it as my mother taught to me all those many years ago with my much younger sister.

"Eric look at this baby, what do you see?"

I looked to my eyes like a very young baby, toothless with a fringe of soft blonde hair crowning its head. Then it smiled up at me and opened its eyes. I froze; they were the exact colour as mine. Blue eyes are not rare by any means, but this particular shade of blue was. It was a dominate gene on my father's side of the family and all children born from him had these eyes. "But that is impossible, I am a vampire, I can't father children" I said in a stunned tone looking at Sookie for confirmation.

She looked back at me and nodded "Eric, we have a son."

Sam stared at us from one to the other and said "Sookie call your jerk of a Great-Grandfather; we need his help to explain this properly."


	2. Chapter 2

It was pointed out that other writers had the whole fae magic idea previously. Not trying to be a copy cat. I thought in book eight when Niall appears and kept wanting to do her a favour, I thought that this might be her desire. After all, she sleeps with dead guys and whines about wanting children, go figure. So I thought the fae magic might work in this situation. Btw, not to get ahead of myself Niall will not be a nice guy in the next chapter. Obsidian

******

Sookie went to call Niall.

I sat there stunned, holding the baby which still continued to smile up at me, he was cute I thought until he grabbed and yanked my hair "ow, take it easy there" I said and received a toothless laugh in return. "What is his name?"

Sam sighed, "Cameron Northman is his real name, but everyone around here thinks that it is Stackhouse. Listen, I should go home you; two need to talk."

I kind of winced at the name 'why two last names?' I thought. "You don't live here?" I was rather glad to hear that.

"No, I am his godfather; I just stop by to help her out once in a while. It is hard to be a single mother."

I got the impression that the last part was meant as I rebuke to me. "You have something to say Sam?"

"Only that a real man steps up to the plate and does the right thing when a woman has his baby"

I glared back at him "this is not a matter of getting carried away and forgetting to use birth control. I AM A VAMPIRE; WE CAN'T HAVE CHILDREN!" I thundered, waking up the child in question and causing him to wail.

Sam looked at me, picked him and started pacing the floor with him resting on his shoulder. "Nice going Brainiac, he is just over three months old and it is almost impossible to get him to sleep as it is.

I felt somewhat chagrined and apologized to Sam or the baby (I couldn't tell which)

Sookie came back and smiled shyly at me; she took Cameron back and set him in his car seat and said good night to Sam. "Niall said he is on the way and will explain things further."

"Eric it has been a while" she once Sam left.

"Sookie, could you please explain to me how……that is even possible?" I asked indicating towards Cameron, who seemed to be trying to eat his own foot.

"One month after you left I started to feel nauseous each morning and missed my period. I went to see a doctor and he said I was pregnant, but I knew that it was impossible because the last man I had been with was you. Quinn was over a year ago. I kept being retested, sure that it was a mistake and then in the 5th month Niall came and told me that he arranged it so that I could conceive and that you were the father."

I pondered this, wondering what his motive would have been. "You were in contact with me. Why not tell me? You didn't have to go through this alone."

She looked right into my eyes and said in a bitter tone "Would you have believed me? You would have thought that I slept with someone else and probably tried to destroy him."

I wanted to shake her "Sookie, I am not a monster; I wouldn't have killed a helpless baby even if he was someone else's. In the past if a vampire's woman wanted to procreate we would glamour a male into providing what we lack. Such things are uncommon, but not unheard of. Who told you I would try and destroy him?"

"Niall said that. He said that you were a danger to him"

I reached over and drew her against me resting my arm around her, she smelled of clean, warm skin and what I could only deduce was breast milk. I could feel the tension in her body and her emotions were in a tangle. "Sookie, we are going to decide what to do about this situation, I promise."

She rested her head on my shoulder and said "well, how do you feel about being a father?"

"I honestly don't know it was never a possibility so I never considered it. We will need to do a DNA test of course."

She pulled away from me sharply "so you don't believe me!"

I knew that if I did anything to provoke her rage that all she was going to do was rescind my invitation and that nothing would be resolved then "I do believe you, he has my eyes. It is just that others won't and we need solid proof of this."

Her anger melted "you're right, I should have thought of that."

I looked at her closer and notice how tired she looked "are you not sleeping properly?"

She gave a weary laugh "you really don't know much about babies. They have to be fed every three hours at this age, so no sooner do I fall asleep when he cries and I have to feed him."

"Is there a way that someone else can feed him without it having to be right from those?" indicating her breasts that had swollen to an even more impressive dimensions.

"Yes, I can use a breast pump to express milk and it can be put into a baby bottle. That is how human fathers help out."

"Would you like if I volunteered to do this? I am up all night after all and you can get some sleep." I pointed out.

She gave me her genuine smile "I would like that, there is some in the fridge that I expressed for Sam earlier, but there more to taking care of babies then that"

"Look, you are falling asleep on your feet. Give me a crash course and go get some rest. If anything happens I will wake you right up.

She quickly explained about sterilizing, warming up the bottle and how to test it. I looked skeptical at the idea of testing it on my elbow so she provided me with a thermometer and after a trial run we found out the proper temperature. She changed Cameron into a sleeper and she allowed me to tuck her into bed. I moved his bassinet close to me and sat down waiting for Niall to appear. I had the feeling I was not going to enjoy our conversation.


	3. Chapter 3

Finished chapter 3, I have to go drink beer and play trivia with my Baby. Hope you like it. Obsidian

Btw, I would never even compare myself as a writer to Terri Botta, she is genius.

******

Cameron started crying so I picked him up and started pacing the way that Sam had earlier, he calmed down a bit. I fed him the way that Sookie had showed me and was very careful to use the towel for burping. Soon he drifted back to sleep and I picked up one of the romance novels that Sookie seemed to be reading.

I was rather surprised to find it to be full of sex 'porn for women, who knew' I mused.

When Niall glided silently into the room I was not surprised.

"Niall, care to explain?" I said without preamble.

He sat at the chair across from me and smiled at Cameron "certainly, my great granddaughter's gifts and blood are too valuable to waste on only one generation. I had thought that I would just let nature take its course and not interfere. But what should happen? She loses her virginity to a vampire and then takes up with another one; neither one of you able to produce children. Useless" he paused.

"I am sorry that you don't care for Sookie's choice or relationships, but what I want to know is why you didn't even ask us our opinions before you made this choice for us."

"She needed to have a baby and is strangely attached to you. You were not what I originally selected. In fact, I went as far as to put a keep away spell on you after you last romantic entanglement and the one that I chose was presented to her. But she rejected him.

"Quinn" I said the dreaded name. "Why did you choose him?"

"He has the physical attributes prized by the fae, no other reason then that."

"And what keep away spell are you referring too?"

"Well after you regained you memory, didn't you feel compelled to stay away from her?"

"That was you? But I didn't always you know."

He looked at me sharply, "I am well aware of that vampire, you are stronger then I thought."

"So you have been manipulating our relationship behind the scene for a while now?"

"Yes, I did what was necessary to impregnate her. I should thank you for that I suppose."

"How?" I was furious but keeping calm as I could

"It helps when you have a few friends that are fertility gods. It was simple; when Quinn fell through I decided that you were pretty much interchangeable for him, as you also possess traits prized by the fae. So with a simple spell you weren't shooting blanks when you last had sex with her and my friend changed her ovulation date. It was a sure thing."

I was now starting to get in a rage "so that only reason why I was chosen to mate with Sookie is not that we love each other, but that I am handsome enough. That is such a crock of shit!"

"Don't get offended, other suitors were considered too, Sam has qualities that would make him good father and is alive, but he is way too short."

"What does height have to do with anything?"

"Have you ever heard of a short fairy? We have very high standards of beauty. If Sookie weren't so deformed, thanks to you, I could have just paired her off with a half-fae and have been done with it."

"Deformed? How the hell can you say that she is deformed; she is beautiful. I was still keeping my voice low, not wanting to wake the baby.

"Come on, she is barely considered to be cute by the fae with all of that ugly scarring. That is why I had to settle for you to be the father of her child. I was getting desperate; she is almost thirty and only has a few good child bearing years left in case this one is as disappointing as Jason and has to be replaced."

"Replaced?"

"Just in my affection, I don't intend to kill him."

"So you are expecting me to provide you with another child is what you are saying?"

Niall looked at me like I was particularly stupid "no when the time comes a suitable person shall be located and she will have his child. Men are extremely expendable, as long as they fit the code. Who cares?"

"I do, what about her choice? I can't imagine that she would like be made into a brood mare or raped by a stranger just to appease you."

"She will do as I say because I have her best interests at heart, besides she always did want children. Or did you not know that? You should be pleased that I allowed you the privilege of fathering her first child."

"I would have been more pleased if I was given a choice in the matter and her too." I said in my coldest voice. What other little things have you influenced? Were you responsible for my abduction and torture?"

"Guilty, sorry about that, but it was necessary. I had to replicate the circumstances under which she fell for you in the first place to tug at the old heart strings. Girls can't resist a wounded hero."

"They say that vampires are monsters, you are the true monsters because at least we retain some human emotion, not like you that has never been human. Were you also the reason why I was sent on that stupid assignment, to make sure that I wasn't here with her? You had me guarding a field of wheat for a full year! I thought Felipe had lost his mind."

"Yes, you might have interfered in my plan."

"So the only place that I fit into your plan was as being a good enough stud horse to your brood mare and then being told I am not good enough to remain with the woman I love."

"From what I know of your reputation Northman, a stud is a polite way of describing you. Man-whore being another."

"Me and my supposed reputation have nothing to do with this situation, I am back now and have no intention of leaving Sookie or this baby to the likes of you."

Niall looked really ugly for a second and leaned right close to my face "You vampires with your cute little kitty cat teeth don't scare me. You met your son, now I want you to stay away from here. You did you part, they don't need you any more."

"And why should I wish to leave?"

"Your being here puts them in danger. Hasn't she suffered enough from your shenanigans? If your enemies learn about him; which they will if you hang around. What is to stop them from using him against you? Your safest course of action is to leave here and never return"

"I will do so if she wants me to, not you, you are nothing to me."

"I could make your life a living hell if I choose."

"We could too; it would be a shame to decimate what little pathetic population still remains of the fae world. Seeing how we love you blood and all, Tinkerbell" I said letting my fangs run out.

He had the good sense to look disturbed by this.

"Now you listen to me, this woman is under my protection and so is this baby." I said pointing at slumbering Cameron "Sookie and I are going to work on our relationship and you and your kind will not interfere in any way shape or form. That includes, no spells, no trying to lure strangers to her, no forced reproduction and finally no torture as a valentine to your Granddaughter. Failure to comply with these restrictions will result in yourself or anyone else who helped you being the guest star of a vampire orgy. Got it?"

"Yes" he hissed.

"Good, then go" I watched as he glided away. "Kitty cat teeth indeed"


	4. Chapter 4

Yes I know, the update is later then usual, but I got my own gracious plenty this morning and spent the day bumming around china town (my guest bedroom looks so beautiful now I wish I could send you a picture..

Now I am here with a beer with Alice Cooper growling at me, one of my favourite things to do.

Yes Cameron is a family name, my maiden name. Couldn't resist using it.

Btw, someone asked about what beer I like. If I go out for date night with Hubby, I drink Rickers Red and until the assholes at labatts decided to discontinue it, I drank Wee Willie dark Scottish style beer. Now my current poison is Laker Red, it is a locally microbrewery that brews it. Obsidian

******

I woke Sookie about 4am in the morning and suggested that she just let Cameron sleep with her so that she can just feed him in bed then go back to sleep for the rest of the night.

I placed him beside her and she grabbed me and started kissing me with such intensity that I would have been breathless if I could breath.

"Sookie hold on a second" I said as I gently pushed her away.

"She looked extremely disappointed and said "you're right I guess it is too soon and I haven't really lost all my pregnancy weight yet."

I laughed at her silly notions "you're beautiful, of course I want to make love with you, I just want to put Cameron in his crib before we crush him to death."

I gently put the sleeping baby in what was formerly her guest room turned nursery and got back into bed with her. I was surprised how hungry her kiss was but so was mine. It only took me a second to slip off her nightgown and she was tugging at my clothes the whole time. When I was undressed she sighed at the feeling of my bare skin against her own. I started sucking her breasts and was rewarded with a mouth full of breast milk, which as surprisingly tasty, this elicited a laugh from her. I kissed my way down her body and gently slipped my fingers into her as I worshipped her damp folds. I fed from her at this moment. She arched her back with orgasm and moaned my name until I told her to be silent, in case we woke the baby. With vampiric speed I rose above her and positioned myself to enter her hot core. She silently begged me with her eyes to and I entered her at last, she moaned at the size of me then sighed as I began to thrust into her. We were both too in need of release for it to last long and it was more like hard fucking then making love and she growled at the end and ripped my back open.

Afterwards, she lay beside me and stroked my shoulder blades; I shivered under this innocent caress. I don't know why but it is an incredible sensation for me to receive even the slightest touch from her. It was bad before, but it worse now after the torture when I couldn't abide to have anyone approach me or touch me but her. "Sookie, we might want to consider using birth control" remembering my conversation with Niall.

She of laughed at this then went silent. I knew that there was something on her mind and I was right "Eric can you tell me what kept you away for so long?"

I hated this part "Felipe sent me to guard a field of wheat from crows, I got to live in this tiny little shack for an entire year. I kept calling him to make sure that he got the assignment right, but he kept saying he did."

I could tell she was struggling not to laugh, "Was it magical wheat?"

"No just common wheat" that did it she threw back her head and laughed. When she calmed down she asked what I fed on. "True Blood, you are the first blood I received from a human for over a year.

She looked at me quizzically, "So if you haven't fed on anyone then does that mean you haven't had sex with anyone either?"

"Yes" I answered dryly.

She sat up in bed dropping the sheets to her waist; a lovely sight "You, Eric Northman have not had sex for a year!" I was not very impressed that she sounded so incredulous.

"Yes, there was no one to have sex with in a wheat field. Sookie, mind if I ask you a question"

"Sure, what is it."

"Did you mention to your great grandfather that you wanted to have my baby at any point?" I was surprised when she started to blush.

"Well, I never said that to him or anyone else out loud, but I thought that if there was anyone I wanted at the father of my child, it was you."

I mulled that over "Well looks like you got your wish."

"I'm sorry Eric, I should have trusted you enough to tell you"

"Look, I want you to promise me something, don't trust Niall he is not what he seems. Don't leave Cameron alone with him ever and if he comes around call myself or Sam to come stay with you."

"I don't understand."

I debated how much of the conversation with Niall that I wished to repeat. "Do you trust me?"

"Yes, of course, I always have."

"That makes me worry sometimes. Just promise me that you will never be alone with him okay?"

"I swear to you on my virginity" she said with a giggle then she reached down and started stroking me again."

"Sook, I won't have time to get home tonight if we have sex again" I pointed out.

"So the light proof hidey hole in still there, stay here tonight."

"Yes, in the nursery. You trust a hungry vampire to stay in the nursery of a baby?"

"Yes, I do, I trusted you to look after him tonight because I know that you are nothing if not honourable."

"You are definitely certifiable woman" and we made love again, this time it was slower.

How I thought in my mind am I supposed to 'do the right thing' as Sam called it while avoiding irate Fairy Princes armed with stakes.


	5. Chapter 5

Back to salt mine, I just love Monday morning, I just love, love Monday grinning cheerlessly

Btw, people seem to be surprised by the field of wheat assignment. Remember, Niall spelled Felipe to sending Eric there that he wouldn't be present when Sookie was pregnant.

Here is the latest installment, yes we are moving ahead slowly. If you don't like it I shall send you my account info and you can write this for me. Kidding. Obsidian

******

I got out of the irritating little wooden box that Sookie had me crash in as quietly as possible, so that I wouldn't wake Cameron if he was asleep. However, he was already awake "Good evening, little guy." He smiled, gurgled and reached his arms up to me.

"You want to get up I see, okay." I lifted him out of the crib and felt his tiny arms on each side of my neck and felt a wave of….I really don't know what quite what it was. Odd.

I took him into the kitchen where I found Sookie, who smiled to see the both of us. "Look who is awake" I said and handed him to her, she set him in the bassinet and latched onto me for a deep kiss while running her fingers through my hair. I practically purred, the touching thing again. 'When did I become a giant cat?' I mused.

I had to go into Fangtasia that night to get caught up with Pam as to what had been happening but didn't want to leave right away. Noticing that there were no cooking smells present I asked "have you eaten dinner yet?"

She shook her head "I am too busy with Cameron to really cook much these days, I will probably just make a sandwich later."

"Can I take you out to dinner and at least get you properly fed before I have to leave?" I asked impulsively.

She seemed surprised by this offer; I guess it seemed very Un-Eric of me to suggest something as common us going out to eat together.

"Well, I am kind of hesitant to leave the house with him.

"That object is called a car seat is it not? So put him in it, we drive to the restaurant and we can just set the seat on a chair while you eat."

She looked at me slightly guilty "we can't really go to anyplace in Bon Temps."

"Why not?" I asked.

"People think that he is Sam's baby, they deduced that when he started coming over to help out."

"I see and he did nothing to disused with notion" I felt rather offended. "Is he the one that took you to the hospital?"

"Yes" she admitted.

Then I felt through the bond that there was something that she was reluctant to tell me "he asked you to marry him." I said flatly now I was angry, but schooled my emotions. Part of me wanted to just go to the bar and stomp short shifter into the ground.

"I said no, I don't love him, I love you and Cam is your baby. Besides, I knew that you would be back and then you and I would……"

She said this part in a rush and then fell silent at the end; I know exactly how she wanted to finish the sentence. That broke down my resolve "Sookie, I want us to talk about this but time is ticking so why don't we get Cam ready (now I was using his nickname) and I'll take you to a vampire run diner I know of in Ruston and we can discuss this over dinner?"

She agreed and we went to the restaurant, I said hi to my friend Angie (highly cuddly petit brunette), she was highly amused to see me holding the car seat and joked that I was bringing a snack. Sookie looked rather offended at how tightly Angie hugged me.

I got us situated at a table and Sookie ordered the meat loaf and a true blood for me while I went to hang our coats. I decided to ripe open the can of worms "So you want to get married?" This almost caused her to choke on her sweet tea; it was a couple minutes with me gently pounding her back before she was able to answer me.

"Nice proposal" she said dryly.

I didn't want to have to tell her what Niall said to me as I know how she feels about family and didn't want to tarnish her opinion of him. But had too. I held nothing back and finished with "and so unless you want to be married to a pile of ashes, with little use other then gritting the driveway in winter. I suggest that we wait until we can work this out with him."

She went pale under her tan and glanced at Cameron like he was an alien

"Sookie, who cares how he got here, he is _our _baby and we will work this out."

She started crying when I said that, causing Angie to ask if it was her meatloaf that was disturbing her.

I took her hand, "Sookie how many times do I have to say I love before you start to believe me?"

"I do believe you, but you were gone so long and I know that you don't believe in marriage."

I was curious "what makes you think that?"

"Well remember what you said about Clancy and Heather's wedding; that you disapproved."

"Of them and their wedding, not marriage in general. Heather is addicted to vampiric sex but has to justify this by getting married to a vampire; Clancy was the only one that said yes."

I had asked Sookie to be my date because apparently I needed to bring one and she had agreed. Between the personally written vows that took each person 20 mins. alone to recite. The karaoke machine in place of dj that started off with the black wedding gown clad bride singing "making whoopee" very badly; I was ready to leave after one hour. Even the food was bad, I asked Sookie how her steak was and she whispered back 'dog food'.

The nice part of the evening was that Sookie and I got into a really intensely passionate mood. After she had a few glasses of champagne she ended up cuddled into my lap and making out with me until the bride told us coldly to 'knock it off'. So we decided to take a drive and the night ended up with us making love hell bent for leather against a tree in a farmer's field while mostly fully dressed. Wonder if her panties are still there? The bad part about that night is she refuses to talk about it and gets annoyed when I bring it up.

After we leave the restaurant I dropped the two of them off and helped her carry Cam into the house. I kissed her goodbye and on impulse picked him up and kissed him too.


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you for those people that have made suggestion which details to add to my story and those that explained various points of the American Health care system that I am brain dead about. Sorry no Sookie Nookie in this one, this is chapter is strictly for laying the tracks for future developments. Bored of me yet? Obsidian

******

After I left Sookie's place I went home long enough to take a shower and wash the smell of sex and breast milk off me. As I waited for my hair to dry I wandered around my place to the other bedrooms that I had never really bothered to decorate.

My bedroom itself was quite large and rather then sleep in the ground like others (I haven't done that since I discovered 800+ thread count designer sheets) I had it arranged so that there was a room within a room, kind of like a closet enclosing the bed and just allowing enough space to walk comfortably around the California king sized bed; this locked in the inner door. The outside part of the room kind of served as an antechamber where I kept my dressers and walk in closet. The antechamber also had opaque windows and white out blinds too. Pam scoffed at the need for the inner room with all the rest, but my reasoning was that if an earthquake hit and shattered the all the windows I could suffer sun damage in my helpless state.

Right beside my room is the smallest bedroom, which contains nothing but a few boxes that I never got around to opening when I moved in.

Using a room design program after plugging in the room dimension I decide that this room would make a good nursery above all the other rooms with it being on a corner and getting plenty of light. I worked on the placement of baby furniture that I had spotted at Sookie's and decided what would work best.

After I got dressed and went in Fangtasia. I was in the office for a few minutes working on the nursery I had planned for my house when Pam came in drinking a True Blood and welcomed me back. "Hey what are you working on so intently?" she asked taking a sip of her drink.

"I am looking up consumer reports on baby furniture" this caused Pam to swallow the True Blood down her unused windpipe and I found myself for the second time that night pounding a choking woman on the back. Of course Pam can't breathe, so she doesn't need air, but we still gag when this happens.

When she stopped she looked at me with incredulous eyes and said "Eric, I know that you like to try and pass for human; but this is a little much."

I closed the door and explained about Cameron. "You two have a baby? Wow, I never thought that would happen."

I replied that I never expected to either; but I kind of liked it. Then I notice that Pam seemed kind of sad. "It there something wrong?"

"No I was just wondering if I could meet him?"

I was surprised by her request, but told her that of course she could then asked her the one question I had never thought of asking before. "Pam, when I turned you, did you ever what children? If so I would like to apologize now."

She smiled and kissed me on the cheek "no, I would have had them because women were expected to back then, but I make a much better vampire then I would have been a mother. However, I think you will make a great father."

I felt kind of touched." Thank you Pam"

She then asked if I had any pictures, so I showed her to ones the Sookie and I took with my digital camera. Oddly of enough of all of the ones that she took; she liked the one where I am holding him upright with my head angled and fangs extended as if I was about to bite his neck. This is the one that she wants to frame and put in the nursery; child welfare department would have a field day if they ever saw it.

Pam helped me find an online baby cribs buying guide and suggested that the both of us go Baby Gap together the next night so that we could get everything that we need in one fell swoop and surprise Sookie by having the nursery set up. She advised against me buying the furniture online saying that it would be better to be able to question a salesperson on safety features in person prior to purchase.

After Pam left I called Dr. Lugwig wanting to see if she handled DNA testing.

"Eric" I said with my usual phone manners when she answered her phone.

"Dr. Lugwig" she answered.

Thinking about Sookie's and Pam's reaction to my revelations tonight I asked "are you drinking anything right?"

"I don't drink on duty" she sounded offended.

"I mean tea, coffee or a soft drink or something?"

"Look vampire, do you want to tell me what you are calling about? I eat, drink and go to the bathroom also if you really need to know"

"I was wondering if you handle DNA testing?"

"Yes, myself and any medical clinic. Why?"

"I need to arrange for a test of course; one set of parents and a baby."

There was dead silence on the other line; I think I managed to shock the unflappable Dr. Lugwig. "It this a potential distant relative of your or something? What parents?"

"Miss Stackhouse, myself and a baby. You can test vampire DNA right?"

"Vampire, are you sure that you are completely recovered from the torture? Sure, I can test it but you know you don't produce live sperm right?"

"Just humor me. Could we arrange an appointment for the test then?"

"Next Thursday at 8pm okay?"

I put her on hold and called Sookie who said that time was fine and suggested that we watch at movie and spend Sunday together at the same time."

"Good, but make sure that you pack for Thursday for Cameron and yourself, you both at spending the night with me at my place."


	7. Chapter 7

Howdy, just a quick note to the person that wished for longer chapters. I have a full time job and a part-time as well. Not to mention a husband who likes to create mess, hates cooking and is allergic to housework. I can only do what I can.

Also, I write the chapter in my head the night before and type it out the next day, when the end of the thought is reached, to coin a phrase: that's all she wrote. Obsidian

Djcoke, yes, I know that am a lousy proofreader, but a beta reader couldn't keep up with my volume. I hope you will forgive my glaring errors, I only even did college English, not University and am a bit out of practice. I promise not to quit my day job and become a professional writer. Hee hee.

******

The next night, when I woke up, beside me on my bed was a stake wrapped with a stupid red bow and a card that read:

Next time this goes into the chest.

Stay away

Niall

I stopped at a toy store on the way over to Pam's and bought a fairy doll. I ripped it to pieces and couriered it to him.

Baby Gap

Pam I went to the Baby Gap before heading out to Fangtasia, the salesman seemed glad to see what seemed to be a young couple closely examining his merchandise until he realized we were both vampires and didn't seem to want to serve us.

I asked him various questions about the types of cribs for sale and what else was recommended for a 3 month old

"What do you need this for?" he asked again.

"For a baby" I snapped at him for the 13th time. Was he particularly stupid?

"And this baby belongs to who" he said in a worried tone.

"It belongs to him", Pam said showing him a picture that she had printed out at the office and put in her wallet. Thankfully she didn't chose the baby biting picture, or I am sure that we would have been kicked out of the store or been arrested.

Pam meanwhile was looking at changing tables, tiny little clothing and practically cooing. It was the scariest thing that I have ever seen her do and I have seen her do a shit load of scary things. She seemed to want to buy out the entire store even maternity dresses for Sookie. I pointed out it was too late for those; the baby was already _outside_ her body.

After dealing with this bumbling idiot for a few minutes and getting nowhere, a customer with a baby of a similar age decided to help me. With her practical guidance we chose a blonde wood crib (I prefer dark toned woods, but know that Sookie prefers light) and matching dresser changing table combo and various other little items needed to set up a basic nursery. She tried to talk to me into buying decorative clowns, seahorses or other themed items, but I said that I would be leaving the decorating up to my future wife (I got a little thrill out of saying this). I arranged for it all to be delivered the next day for us to put together. Pam insisted she be present to help.

I thanked the lady for her help and she cautioned me to wash all linen prior to use and what types of detergent and fabric softener to use. I respect pragmatic people very well.

Sunday

I slipped silently into Sookie's house in case she was sleeping (she was) and went to check on Cameron (who wasn't). I quickly changed him and put in his bassinet while I surprised Sookie by cooking her dinner, Chicken with White Wine and Tarragon Sauce (Eric's recipe is below).

I was almost finished when she came out of the bedroom.

"Um, something smells good"

I explained that I was making her dinner and she seemed surprised by that.

"When did you learn to cook?"

"I took a few college cooking courses at the same time that I took language courses. I thought it might be fun."

She laughed at this idea "is there anything that you can't do well?"

"Sunbath" I said as I leaned in for a kiss.

We made love for the first but not the last that night; in fact we kept pausing the movie we were watching and either putting Cameron into his crib or dashing into the bedroom in order to. Sookie had a strong _no sex in front of the baby _policy.

We were making out on couch with me just in my jeans and Cameron lying on my lap. Sookie was dressed just in my t-shirt when someone drove up the drive.

Sookie answered the door her friend Tara brushed past her. She stared at me in shock; it was pretty obvious what we had been up to with our half dressed state, tousled sex hair and the fact that the entire room smelt like sex didn't help.

She whirled around to confront Sookie, "What the hell is Eric doing here? Does Sam know that he is here?"

I was about to say something when Sookie yelled at her "Why should Sam even need to know? Cameron isn't Sam's baby; he's Eric's."

I don't know who looked more surprised that she admitted this, Tara or I. Sookie took her aside and explained as much as she was able to and asked Tara to leave. Tara gave me a horrified look as she left. 'That one isn't a fan of vampires', I mused.

After she left, the mood was kind of killed, so we put Cameron back to bed when I finally asked a question that had been haunting me.

"Sookie, if you aren't working, what are you living on?"

She explained that her friend Claudine gave her a cheque for $20,000.00. 'Niall again' I thought. I know that to her it probably seemed like a lot of money and calculated in my head how much she would need for one year. It was exactly that amount, with no room for extras. It was an insulting low amount; I pay my lowest paid employees $15,000.00 more and offer full benefits.

"Sookie, I want you to calculate how much of that money you have spent and how much you have left. We are going to return it to him. From now on I am supporting you both."

Eric's Recipe Chicken with White Wine and Tarragon Sauce Ingredients

2 tablespoons olive oil

1 red onion, chopped

6 boneless skinless chicken breasts

1/2 cup white wine

1 1/4 cups heavy cream

2 tablespoons tarragon, chopped

1 lb pasta noodles

salt & freshly ground black pepper

Directions Fill a very large saucepan with water, add salt, then cover and leave to come to the boil. Meanwhile, heat the olive oil in a large high-sided frying pan. Add the onion and gently fry over medium-low heat for 5-7 minutes until soft. Raise the heat and add the chicken breasts. Cook for about 5 minutes, turning, until lightly browned on all sides. Stir in the white wine and bubble for a minute or two until reduced. Pour in the cream and heat through. Add the tarragon and season with salt and freshly ground black pepper. Cook the pasta until 'al dente'. Drain thoroughly, then tip into a warmed serving dish. Arrange the chicken and sauce on top. 


	8. Chapter 8

Thank you for all the nice comments as of yesterday everyone. It is nice to receive encouragement in any form. Heck, if you guys want recipes, I love to cook and lots of favourites. I love slow cooker stuff the best, except for having to wash the damned thing out that is. Obsidian

*****

I went to pick up Sookie to bring her to my home in a Honda Station Wagon; yes you are reading this correctly. I had to borrow Pam's crappy non-sports car because I don't have a back seat in my corvette. Not only was I not allowed to drive my pride and joy, but I had to go the speed limit. Normally I love to drive, now, not so much. If fact Sookie accused me of pouting; vampires do not pout.

She wanted to drive both of them up in her Malibu, but I don't trust her car, it doesn't even have air bags. I want to buy her a new one, but she says that hers is fine. So it looks like we might have to get two cars at this rate. One with a back seat for me when I am 'family driving' and one for her that not only one tune up away from breaking down in the middle of nowhere.

After I picked her up and saw the amount of stuff needed to travel with a baby for one night (or several if I can convince her) I was glad that I brought a larger car. It was like she was bringing the entire nursery with her. Now I see why parents buy mini vans.

Once we finally get the car loaded and straped in the baby seat, we started the suddenly long drive to Shreveport with Sookie watching the speedometer like a hawk and squawking like one the minute I drove even 5 kilometers over the speed limit. Cameron seemed to find this funny because I kept hearing his little baby giggle coming from the back seat when she was nagging me. So much for us men sticking together.

When we finally got to my house she went completely silent, I guess she was expecting a condo or a townhouse, not a place that looked like it was lifted from the New Orleans garden district. "You live here?" she said in awe.

"Yes, no one questions why you have a corvette if you live in a place this big" I said as if this explained anything. The actual reason is that I just like big houses, but was hardly going to admit that. I have a thing for flash if you haven't noticed.

I got the car unloaded and showed her around, the marble black tiled marble entrance way was enough to make her to say "wow". I first showed her the kitchen that I had stocked up with her favourite foods for the visit; that alone was enough to make her eyes tear up. I showed her the living room; she seemed to be examining stairs and various features of the room, so I asked her what she was looking at. She explained how unsafe my place was a toddler and how we are both going to have to baby proof later on. Wow, a new car and special locks on things. There really is more involved to being a parent then I thought.

She asked where she was sleeping and I showed her the bedroom and how I had adapted it to suit a human too by adding a reading light, baby monitor and digital alarm clock on her side of the bed (yes vampires do favour sides on which we like to sleep). I gave her the code for inner door for when she got up so that she could lock it. She seemed surprised and really happy that we could sleep together, if only in shifts.

I saved the nursery for last, Pam and I did a rather good job setting everything up I thought. It was plain except for the furniture and a slightly scary looking giant stuffed panda lolling in the corner that held a red heart that read 'I love you'. Pam had insisted on her purchasing this ghastly thing over my protests. Pam had somehow gotten a hold of an antique cradle to add to the nursery. Sookie started crying in earnest at what I had done and said I was so sweet (shudder). She asked why I didn't decorate it more and I replied that I thought that she might like to decorate it to her taste.

I had to drag her out of there so we could get to Dr. Ludwig's office in time for our appointment. The office was a study in beige and elevator musical versions of to 1980's hits played softly over hidden speakers. Dr. Lugwig herself let us into the lab, her eyes grew wide when she saw Sookie holding Cameron "wow there actually is a baby" she mused.

"I wouldn't waste your time making an appointment for DNA testing for us and a baby without one." I pointed out

She did the buccal swab on all three of us and also did a skin scraping on me. As I was considered to be deceased, she needed a tissue sample in case she had to do the test that way. She explained that it would be 3-5 business day in order to get the results back. Normally she could have it done within 24 hours, but needed more time to do the 'dead guy' test.

I took Sookie out for a bite to eat as I promised Pam that I would bring Cameron over to Fangtasia to meet her. Sookie had no objections as long as we used the back entrance and stayed in my office while we were there. We just went to a local diner and Cameron managed to charm our waitress. She flirted with me while Sookie was in the washroom and I finally let me fangs run out just to get rid of her.

We took Cameron to my office and I went to get Pam. I was astonished at how she latched onto him. She was cooing over him like crazy; 'it looks like Cameron has a new vampire Aunt' I mused. It would have been cute if it wasn't kind of eerie.

Sookie said she was thirsty so I volunteered to get her a Fruitopia from the bar. I was had just stepped up to it when I felt someone run their hand down my arm in a caressing manner. I turned to find an attractive brunette wearing a low rise PVC micro mini skirt and matching top that ended just below her bra line. From the bottom of her top was a completely sheer draping of chiffon that ended just above the bottom of her skirt. She also was heavily pregnant and the chiffon only accentuated this. She smiled at me "I saw you come in with the baby; if that is your thing I can help you." She took my hand and placed it on her belly, pouting at me in a sexy manner with her black lips. I could smell the alcohol on her breath and noticed that her walk was unsteady.

About a year and a half ago, I probably would have taken her up on her offer as a pregnant fang-banger was not something that I have ever experienced. Now all I could feel was disgust that she would endanger her unborn by using it as a lure for vampires. I marveled for a few seconds at how taut the skin felt beneath my fingers as this is what I missed all together; Sookie's pregnancy itself. Then I drew her aside. I glamoured her and put this into her head 'I will not drink; I will take care of myself. I will not return here nor seek the company of vampires anymore.' After I got Felicia to call a cab and sent her home.

I told Felicia that from now on we were not serving alcohol to pregnant women and even printed out a picture of one to stick behind the bar so she would know what to look for. Felicia is lovely, but missing a few marbles.

After we left the club, Sookie was worn out so I tucked her into bed and took the additional baby monitor into my office so that I could go over invoices. I heard a familiar gurgling and found Cameron looking bored. "Can't sleep?" I asked "silly boy, you are supposed to be sleeping through the night." I chided him.

Long and short of it, we ended up watching the closest thing I have to a kid's movie together 'Shoot 'Em Up' before he finally went to sleep.

Just before dawn I crawled into bed beside Sookie, she shifted in her sleep and embraced me. I got to fall asleep beside the woman I love; not something a vampire normally gets to do.


	9. Chapter 9

I couldn't resist creating a slightly different version of Eric in this chapter; only this one is bisexual and annoys the heck out of him. You will see why he annoys him so much. Obsidian

******

I was in my office at Fangtasia and thinking the situation about Niall and what to do to him.

I wrote down the following points to help aid me:

He thought that Sookie wanted children so bad that she would accept anyone's.

He had arranged that her vampire boyfriend would be called away to duty using the one person who has authority over me thinking that I would reject because of belief that she was unfaithful to me. Or that she would chose another mate in my absence.

He thought that Sam would be willing to act as guardian to any children that she produces because he is in love with her.

He gave her just enough money to be able to survive the year without a penny more.

The conclusions that I drew were: that he underestimated all parties involved, he is out of touch with modern technology and he is generally an egotistical, sadistic bastard.

So I decided I needed more personal information about him and who better to get this from then his own personal Delilah, like in the bible. Yes, I have read it. There are only so many books in the world that you haven't read when you are over 1000 years old.

Fortunately I know the gentleman in question very well and shun him at all costs. Not that I don't like him, it is just that although I am considered to be good looking by human and vampire standards; he is far better looking. He goes by the name Raven these days as most of the _female_ poser vampire want-to-bes do. But it suits him, he has long wavy glossy black hair with full red pouting lips and cat green eyes almond shaped eyes. He is both taller and broader than me, with a tiny waist and face so pretty that even I feel like kissing him. I feel like the ugly kid brother when he is around. Okay I hate the guy. Niall is bi-sexual in case you are wondering.

Knowing that Raven or John as I knew him until now was only a couple of states over I invited him to come visit me. He sent me back an email saying that he would love to visit and party with me, heat up a couple cool fang-bangers for us. Wonder what he is going to think of my new monogamous state?

A couple of nights later he strolled into the bar, I knew that he was there without me having to turn my head. I can always tell when all of the fang-bangers that were previously staring up at me were suddenly glancing past me. Sigh, this is so humiliating.

I'll be damned if he didn't come right onto stage with me, run his fingers through my hair and kiss me on the cheek. Of course, the fact that his hair hid my face from view most likely, it looked to everyone else like he was kissing me on the lips. That had to be a reason why everyone was gaping at us afterwards. He was dressed as eccentrically as ever in a green lace up pirate shirt and stretch denim jeans so tight that he might as well have tattooed 'well endowed' on his forehead. Pam of course came running and wrapped herself around him, he is the closest thing to a steady relationship that she has. All I needed was Sookie panting after him and Cameron begging for his attention right now and my night would have been complete.

I suggested that we go talk in my office so that we could have some more privacy and damned if he didn't caress my shoulder while we spoke. "Sure, I would love to be alone with you" he purred into my ear. I don't mind pretending to flirt with guys, but I do not like when they grope me. Still, I tried not to get annoyed; he is just naturally a touchy feely person.

I put my hands in my pockets and stalked ahead of him just in case he tried to hold my hand while we walked there.

He tried to kiss me again as soon as the office door was closed. "Would you be serious for once and talk to me." In that instance all of his sensuous charm and flirtatious manners was gone and he was just plain old John. "Okay what would you like to talk about?" he said in a deeper tone of voice free of innuendos.

"I know that you and Niall had a fling about 700 years ago and were wondering if you would be willing to supply me with some personal information. Let's just say that he has been irritating me lately."

"Okay" he said fluttering his long, long eyelashes "but it will cost you."

"Okay, what do you want?" he opened his mouth to speak

"Except for sleeping with me. You never quit do you?"

He pouted at me "Eric, you are no fun."

"I am to the ladies" I pointed out.

"One of these days you are going to yield yourself to me" he said with a leer. Why did that sound so familiar? Hmmmm

I was getting sick of his bullshit and told him so. "Look I can offer you women, money or a favour, but not a sexual one. What is it going to be?"

He looked at me with his normal expression and said "I get to take Pam on for two weeks vacation to a place I choose and you pay."

"Okay, if that is what you want, but Pam has to agree of course" I was kind of glad he suggested idea Pam had told me that she had felt frustrated by her lack of sex partners lately. If there is one thing that John is good at it is keeping Pam happily sexed. They disappeared for two years the night that they first met. Pam still gets a dreamy look in her eye when his name is mentioned.

I called Pam into the office and asked if she was willing to be his travel companion, the way her face lit up was like he had just given her an engagement ring. Why was everyone so into this guy? He annoys me. After all who likes to be constantly harassed sexually?

Then we got down to business. "What do fairy want above all else?" I asked him.

He thought for a second "Sex with a really hot person, they already have money and power, it is sex they want."

"Are you sure that you are not talking about yourself?" somewhat skeptical.

"Yes, the thing that fairies prize is physical beauty and they use that to barter with. If you want something from him, you would have to offer him a sublime male or female to warm his bed."

"Like who?"

"Well, you can always offer him yourself."

I leaned over the desk so close to him that we were practically kissing "For the last time, I LIKE WOMEN. I experimented a bit when I was younger and curious but it never got beyond kissing."

"It was just a suggestion, you should give it a try" he said and did kiss me. "Call me when you are ready to try it" he purred and ran his hand down my chest. I shoved him away. How it is that no one staked this idiot in over 6000 years? Yes, he was much, older than me.

Just then Pam stuck her head into my office "Sookie called, she wants to know if you can pick up a box of disposable diapers and baby wipes on the way home."

Of course this is the worst timing ever for that speech.

John narrowed his eyes at me and said in a voice like a caress "sounds like you're still experimenting. Care to explain, Lover?"


	10. Chapter 10

Sorry, I have to get this chapter out as soon as possible. My boss is driving me bonkers today and I won't have time otherwise. I shall get back to those that requested recipes later. I hate my job sometimes. Anyone have a beer to give me? I need a drink :( Obsidian

******

Deciding it was just easier to show him, rather then having to explain why diapers and baby wipes were being requested by someone called Sookie. I invited him to come over to my house.

"I would love to go home with you, Lover" he purred.

I locked the office and told Pam that I was leaving and gestured for Raven/John to follow me. He chose not to, instead he _skipped ahead through the bar _and sang in a sing-song voice 'I'm going to Eric's, I'm going to Eric's'. He only paused long enough to grab a fang-banger, dip her, kiss her deeply then just as fast brought her back to her feet, patted her cheek and skipped away. I, who was walking much slower behind him managed to catch her before she swooned and pushed her into her boyfriend's arms (I think). The man is a buffoon!

I got into my corvette and he got onto his Harley Davison motorcycle. I don't understand why he would choose so obvious a mode of transportation, it was purely for show. It was paint metallic purple with red flames and a vanity plate that read "Fangs 4 U". His leather jacket's back was air brushed with a happy face with vampire teeth. On the left side of his jacket in front, over where his heart is, had a target painted on it. He looked ridiculous.

He pulled up beside me, waved happily and then roared off ahead of me. I then realized that I was going the speed limit, yelled "fuck" as loudly as possible, opened my engine as far as she could go and roared off after him. Sookie had only been with me for three days and she was effecting my driving!

I stopped into the 7-11 to pick up what Sookie needed and 2 dozen true bloods. The clerk's eyes widen when he noticed my purchases, I glared at him challenging him to say anything. He wisely just put my purchases in a bag and handed me my change. Which I promptly dropped when John, who had come into the store with me, patted my ass and kissed my neck. I whirled around and glared at the taller vampire; John is seven feet tall. He made his famous pout and winked at the stunned clerk. I just got back into my car and left. Damn him!

When we got to my place I realized that I should have called Sookie to let her know that we were expecting a guest this evening. But then I remembered that normally she just meets me at the door in a practical nightgown or bathrobe, so I didn't worry. Well I should have, when she opened the door wearing sheer red lingerie. She had on baby doll style lingerie with a matching sheer red thong, black stay ups and red feather trimmed come-fuck-me pumps. She looked delicious, she had even styled her hair for me. I was less happy to see her dressed up for me in my life. She stood there frozen staring at John with a look of horror on her face, while he examined her from head to toe. She went as red as her lingerie. As fast as I could I whipped off my leather jacket and covered her with it. "I appreciate the view very much; but think that we both would be better off if you put on the largest, bulkiest bathrobe that you own" I said into her ear.

She agreed and scuttled off to get one; she came back wrapped in one of mine.

I notice that John's fangs had run out at the sight of her and glared at him.

"Eric, are you quite attached to your friend?" he asked.

"She is mine" I said wondering why I was getting such a sense of de ja vu from this conversation.

"Do you allow visitors to have fun with her too?" he said and dared to push the shoulder of her bathrobe aside.

I yanked her into my arms and said "leave my wife alone!" This caused both him and her to stare at me with equally astonished expressions. "Well, she will be when this matter is settled." I finished lamely. "Now behaviour yourself, I would like to your meet Sookie Stackhouse, Sookie, this is John."

They exchanged pleasantries

Just then the baby monitor kicked in and Cameron knew that I was home and did his little 'come play with me' giggle. He insisted on getting up for a while when I arrived home each time, like he could sense me. I had asked Sookie if perhaps he might have her gift and she said wouldn't know until he starts to speak.

"I'll see to him" I told her, please could you attend to our…guest" I called him for lack of a better word. "John or Raven, whatever you like to call yourself these days; no funny business."

I went to get Cameron and he smiled and extended his arms "Hello, Son I am happy that someone is glad to see me tonight." Realizing that he needed changing, I did so as quickly as I could. He wrinkled his tiny nose at the odour and I said "well, it doesn't smell like roses to me either." I tickled his tiny belly with my hair and he laughed. I redressed him then held up two blankets. When he wakes up he likes to be wrapped in a blanket. "Is it going to be Snoopy or duckies tonight?" I swear he pointed at the duckies, so I chose that one, wrapped him up and carried him to the living room.

John was sitting in a chair drinking a true blood while Sookie was on couch and he seemed to be telling her a story. "So Eric was caught with his pants literally down having sex with the King's woman and all he could do was apologize while bowing with this huge erection." Sookie threw back her head and laughed.

"John what are you telling Sookie?" I remembered all to well the incident of which he was speaking; and never wanted it repeated.

The sight of Cameron in my arms actually managed to silence John (for once) and he responded by sniffing Sookie's wrist "fae" he proclaimed. He came over to us and said "may I" I nodded and he sniffed Cameron's head. His eyes grew wide. "Eric what the hell is going on?"

"Sookie is Niall's great-granddaughter and this is his great-great-grandson and my son too."

He swore in a different language "Niall, you silly old bugger. Now I see the problem."

"You know Niall?" asked Sookie confused.

John pulled back his hair to expose his pointy ears "Know him? I was his consort until I was made into a vampire."

"You were fae" said Sookie.

"Yes, I am 6000 years old, I was dating a vampire lady back then and her nest mates were jealous. So they lured me one night and used me to their cruel delights. When my lady found me, there was just enough life in me left to turn me. Naturally because I was tainted, I had to give up my position and my lover in the fae world." I was surprised, he actually seemed sad when he said this.

"You also had to give up being a god" I prompted.

"Yes, I was Loki, the Norse god. Eric used to worship me, but not the way I wanted him to ever" he said with a sour look shot in my direction.

"And never will" I retorted"

"Sookie, you have to hear how I met Eric. He was a young puppy about fifty years old and couldn't glamour, fly or even pick up a meal to save his life. I had to take him under my wing and teach him everything that he knows. You should have seen him trying to glamour, he used to do the whole 'look into my eyes thing." It was embarrassing!"

"That is so not true. What little you did want to teach me, I didn't want to have to pay the price for" I retorted. Not liking how Sookie seemed to be struggling not to laugh.

I heard what sounded like a Honda Station Wagon pulling up into my drive and sure enough Pam arrived. She squealed when she saw him exit the house, jumped up on him and wrapped her legs around him while he tried to suck her tongue down his throat.

"Would you two get off my lawn and take it inside. What will my neighbours think?" I said in a really prissy tone of voice that shocked the hell out of me and them.

"Did Pam just squeal?" said Sookie surprised.

"Yes, John is her.." I thought of many words to describe their relationship, some not very nice and finally settled on "boyfriend".

John still holding Pam in place grinned and said "well, Eric was her first, so she had to find a real man after him."

I bristled and wondered I staking him would not be a bad idea.

"Well kids, it has been a slice, but I gotta get me some sexing as Pam invited me to spend the night. I am going to help you with this, so we will discuss this tomorrow night" They said their goodbyes and left, not without him trying to stick his tongue down my throat too. "Bye Lover" he said before he roared away on his motorcycle

I turned to Sookie and said "sorry that I didn't call you to warn you that I was bringing that rutting peacock over"

"Isn't it supposed to be strutting peacock?"

"Not in this case, it is definitely rutting." I said "Can you believe that guy; he is crude, rude, arrogant…"

"He is you Eric."

"What do your mean? I will admit that I am a tad egocentric, but nothing even close to that!"

She slipped off her bathrobe and suddenly I didn't care to discuss him anymore.


	11. Chapter 11

Thank you for all the nice reviews folks. Yes, I got my drink, several in fact and I am in Hangover Central at the moment. Oh my head. Obsidian.

******

John arrived the next day just after we finished our separate dinners. She had slow cooker chicken and dumplings (see Eric's recipe) and I had her (both ways) so I was in a pretty good mood. He was wearing one of his crazy outfits again; this one consisted of purple pants with thigh high boots, a red sash and a hot pink shirt open to his navel with purple polka dots. I thought that he looked like a white Jimi Hendrix and told him so. He responded by giving me a full body hug, I could feel him harden against me. I pushed him away. 'How could women like that feeling' I wondered.

I noticed that when he turned that he had a hickey on his neck. "Did Pam give that to you right before you left so it would still be visible when you got here?"

He leered at me and said "why are you jealous? You should have seen the whip marks on my back last night."

Sookie looked at me quizzically when he said that "Pam is into some things that I am not" I explained simply.

John looked Sookie over again and seemed disappointed that she was fully dressed except for feeding Cameron. She was holding the blanket that I tossed her over him.

The phone rang and I went to answer it, it was Dr. Lugwig who sounded like she had been drinking this time.

"Congratulations you are a daddy. I don't know how the hell you did it"

I was not surprised, but it was nice to have solid proof "Thanks Dr. Lugwig, I thought that you didn't drink while you were on duty?"

"I closed early; I figure that if vampires can create children, which is against all medical science. It time to break out the bottle of tequila."

I cautioned her against drinking and driving and told her that I would settle our bill tomorrow and pick up the test results.

"I am three feet tall, I can't drive. Don't worry, if I need a ride tomorrow I'll call you; if you can knock Sookie up, you can probably go about in the daylight too" and with that she hung up.

I looked at Sookie and said "test results are in, 100% guaranteed that I am the daddy".

John finally said, "if I am going to help with this, I need the whole story. Leave nothing out, especially the parts about Eric having sex with you" the last part was directed at Sookie.

She laughed, "I don't know why you pick on Eric so much."

"Cause I want his sweet ass." He answered showing fang.

"Yes, he does have a nice one; you should see how it looks in hot pink spandex legging." I flinched, she wouldn't.

"Yes, there was one time when I was investigating my friend's murder and I had to go to an orgy to search for clues. I asked Eric along for protection and to pretend to be gay and he showed up in pink spandex leggings and halter-top. He was pretending to flirt with everyone. It was priceless." Sigh, she would.

John looked smug "Still have the outfit? I would buy it off you if you do."

"Then there was the time in Jackson that he came onto a cute little vampire male so that he could get me a car so I could rescue my ex-boyfriend. You never did tell me after I left you there with Bernard, honey." Now they were bonding, I just loved this.

"Omigod, you came onto a guy to help her ex-boyfriend?! Kudos to you girlfriend, I should been a hot blonde, then I could have wrapped him around my finger just like you!"

"I kissed him a few times, told him that I was going to freshen up and crashed in a broom closet. Then I flew out as soon as I woke up the next day. End of story"

"What about the hickey?" she asked in a wicked tone.

"He needed to be convinced, so I let him suck on my neck a bit." My eyes said 'I am going to get you' to her.

We told him the story and all he could say was "Niall sure has changed. Is he still as hot?"

"Yes, very hot" said Sookie.

"I told Eric the coin that he would want to be paid in and that is contractual sex with someone who is gorgeous and up to the fae standards of beauty. Like him."

"And even for her I cannot off that, I am not on the table."

"I can put you there, or any other place that you would like to make love," said John sliding his hand suggestively up my thigh. I simply brushed it away.

He laughed "one of these days you will yield yourself to me, Lover" Sookie seemed amused by this statement.

I started naming off vampires that I know that might be sufficiently pretty or handsome, but of course he seemed to have had sex with all of them and knew their flaws, so he kept on saying such things as "ugly birthmark, mole on her right cheek, one leg shorter then the other" until I finally said, "well we certainly can't ask Martin O'Brien, he is not only butch beyond belief but a homophobe.

John shrugged "he wouldn't suit anyway, he is less endowed then he looks"

I sat there stunned "you had sex with Martin? How?"

John smiled "I was a fairy, fairies can talk people into anything. You see if you had been born a fairy you wouldn't have had to wait until Bill dumped her, she would have been your in two seconds the night you met her" indicating towards Sookie.

"What and miss the fun of chasing her around for four years and taking bullets for her? You never talk me into having sex with you" I said sarcastically.

Sookie adjusted herself and burped Cameron "I am putting him in his crib to see if he will sleep" she said and kissed me. Then John did too and it kind of ruined the moment.

"So you are actually going to marry her?" he asked.

"Yes as soon as this matter is settled. I love her and want to be with her."

He whistled "Eric Northman, a family man. Who knew? No rings yet though."

"Tomorrow, I am taking her to dinner to propose and Pam is watching Cameron for us"

"Pam with a baby? This I gotta see. Mind if I hang out with her?"

"Okay, but no sex in front of the baby."

He blinked at me innocently "who me?" Then he got serious "Eric, I think that there might be someone that we can offer him that I doubt who he would say no to."

"Who?" I asked.

He brushed his cheek against mine briefly and said "Me."

Slow Cooker Chicken and Dumplings Ingredients: 4 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves 2 tablespoons butter

2 (10.75 ounce) cans condensed cream of chicken soup

1 onion, finely diced

2 (10 ounce) packages refrigerated biscuit dough, torn into pieces

One package of dry onion soup mix (optional)

Directions:

Place the chicken, butter, soup, onion soup mix and onion in a slow cooker, and fill with enough water to cover.

Cover, and cook for 5 to 6 hours on High. About 30 minutes before serving, place the torn biscuit dough in the slow cooker. Cook until the dough is no longer raw in the center.


	12. Chapter 12

Hangover better, just in case anyone is wondering about the gay theme, Eric is not going to have sex with John or any male. Our boy is straight and I would never force him into a position that he is not comfortable with.

Farming neighbour, I miss taping maple trees and boiling the sap down. I grew up just outside of Kemptville, Ontario and my elderly next-door neighbour used to run a sugar bush. My sister and I would help him collect the sap buckets and boil it down the old fashioned way in the huge iron rectangular pan. Man, his maple syrup was the best I ever tasted! The weather is coldish and the ground is defrosting. Mud, mud and more mud :(

*****

"You?" I asked skeptically "What's the catch? You would never do anything without some kind of embarrassing price attached. You know that I won't sleep with you right?'

John laughed, "Oh you will one of these days, but not now. No, it is going to cost you, but it won't be a sexual favour that I want."

"What then?"

"You have to model the pink outfit that Sookie was talking about and give me a real kiss, we are talking full body contact, tongue and all."

"Just a kiss? I guess that is a fairly low price to pay as far as you are concerned. Very well, I accept. However, I do want to know first. Why you would volunteer in the first place?"

"Simple, I miss Niall. Eric, what do you think happens to fae when they become a vampire."

"I imagine it would be hard to be around your own kind."

"Yes, I lost everything the night I was turned and I had it all. I was considered to be one of the best looking fairies of the generation, I was consort to a powerful prince whom I love and loved me back, that is a powerful position to be in. I had people begging to sleep with me. I had people handing me money and doing me favours for nothing more than I existed. I was god and I had to give that all up. It would have been better if I had died, at least I would have had a burial to rival them all. Instead, I woke up with the stupid bitch saying that now we could be together forever. That lasted a week."

I was not used to John being serious and felt kind of bad that I had never considered his position. So I surprised myself by reaching forward and pulling him into my arms and hugging him. Which was strange; I had never been a cuddly vampire, especially to males.

He looked back in shock when I drew away and said "Eric, are you feeling okay?"

I grinned at him and said, "guess I have to go change."

I went to the bedroom and told Sookie, who was reading in bed about the terms of John's proposal. The last thing that I needed was to have her walk in while I was French kissing a man and think that I had decided to bat for the other team the night before I propose to her. I was a little astonished when she helped me into the stupid outfit and asked if she could watch. "You want to watch me kiss a guy! Have you gone crazy! If it was girl you would be sharpening the stake as we speak."

"Yes, but it isn't a girl, it is a kiss in the line of duty and we all have our fantasies."

"Sookie, if you picturing me making love to a guy gets you hot, get it out of your head. It is not going to happen. Especially not with John."

She grinned evilly at me "why not John? He is so hot!"

I was rather irked that she noticed this "well, for one do you know how annoying it is to be told by someone that you will yield yourself to them? Then there is the derogatory term Lover."

She seemed to be struggling not to laugh, "Yes, I can imagine that might be annoying. Especially if it goes on for years."

"You have no idea" I said in exasperation.

Once I was properly dressed in the foolish outfit. To this day I do not know where Pam found the spandex pants. Sookie gave me the once over. "I really should have taken you home that night so I could have taken this off of you. So why don't you pay the piper and then I can get your pretty ass back into bed."

I could feel my fangs run out and myself getting hard at the idea. "Damnit Sookie, I am now he is going to think that I am hard from the idea of kissing him.

She smiled at me evilly again, got on her knees and took care of my predicament in no time flat. "There" she said "now go kiss the hottie, so I can get hot watching you two." Sookie has a fetish. Who knew?

I walked into the room and John's eyes widened in appreciation "you look good enough to eat."

"Okay, I will kiss you, but there are certain ground rules. You do not touch me below the waist in the front or the back and no part is ground against me. Got it."

"Sure, but first give me a little spin"

I looked at Sookie hovering in the doorway and made sure that I gave a little shake to my hips when my ass faced her. I could hear her laugh. "You mind if she watches?"

"Not a problem, so come over here." I could tell from his voice and the obvious bulge in his pants that he was getting excited. I tried not to shudder.

I placed my arms around him and for once had to raise my head to reach his lips. He moaned when I placed my lips against his and pulled me firmly against him. I felt his lips open and allowed him to massage his tongue with mine. His hands were everywhere except where I decreed that they were not allow. He stroked my hair and back. He was a great kisser; his lips were soft and supple. I was actually enjoying, as it was different, for once I knew how a girl must feel being kissed by a large male.

Then it was done. He pulled back and looked at me, then looked down. "You really are straight. Too bad. You have done your part; I will contact Niall and see if he will go along with our suggestion. If he does, marry her right away. She really loves you" and with a final squeeze he stepped back.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

He grinned back to him normal 'cocky' (ha ha) self and said "going to take this over to Pam's," he said indicating his erection.

We laughed and said goodbye. Sookie practically ripped the outfit off me and made love to me on the couch; she was too far-gone to wait until we got to the bedroom.


	13. Chapter 13

Misbehaving Loki Style

Slightly hungover again and watched the movie Let the Right One In last night, the one about the 11 year old vampire girl. It is wicked, you have to see it. My husband is bugging me for being hungover and I am trying not to kill him. Someone asked for a story that involved Pam and John, so I thought that I would include it in this chapter. I plan to use him in other stories, I really like the character. Btw, the school scene I took from one of the ones that I do for Dom work, mind you there is no sex with my clients, but I figured that in a personal setting I could see them doing this. Obsidian

******

Sookie and I had just finished a particularly long, slow bout of lovemaking and were still in bed; she was feeding Cameron. I decided that I liked moments like this, just lazily lounging in bed with _my family._ I leaned over and kissed her while stroking Cameron's fuzzy head. "This is nice, but we should get dressed, the reservations are for 8 and Pam will be here in half an hour."

"Are you sure we should go? I have never left Cameron alone before" she said nervously.

I thought about the ring that I had ready to give her and replied, "he will be fine, Pam has all but adopted him. Besides we showed her how to take care of him and she has all our contact information." I got out of bed and started to put on the dark blue suit that I had chosen.

She reluctantly put Cameron into his bassinet and started to put on the red silk dress that I had bought her for tonight. "Do you think that she will bring John with her?"

"Probably, but even if she does Cameron is safe from him until he is about 20 I guess" I could see the idiot making a trip to Louisiana to see how he looked and if he was seducible.

I watched as she put on her makeup, I never get tired of looking at her.

Once we were ready Pam and John arrived. John seemed to be dressed as a priest tonight complete with collar. "Marrying someone tonight?" I asked.

He winked back at me "soon perhaps."

While Sookie went to get her wrap I went over the two pages of instructions that I wrote for them and told them the house rules. I finished with "in other words, no misbehaving. Got that!" They both nodded.

We left for the restaurant. Not before John pinched my ass though.

******

"They don't do much do they" indicating the slumbering Cameron. "They just seem to cry, eat and sleep."

"Well John, he is an awfully young baby, he will be more entertaining when he is a little older."

I could feel my fangs extend "about 20 ought to do it"

Pam laughed "you're horrible, Eric would kill you if he heard you say that."

"Hey if my hearts desire keeps saying no, than I will just have to try other sources" looking at the source in question. "He really doesn't look like either one" I commented.

Pam shrugged "he will grow into his features as he gets older and then we will find out."

"Pam I am so bored, entertain me."

She narrowed her eyes at me "how?"

I opened the bag and showed her the schoolgirl costume that I had stolen out of her wardrobe. "I am the priest and you are the naughty school girl."

Her eyes took on a wicked gleam and she said"now you talking."

She went to change "don't forget the pigtails, I called after her. I took the school strap from the bottom of the bag and leaned over the crib. Cameron looked up at me with Eric's eyes and smiled. He was kind of cute I guess. "Hey little guy, Uncle John and Aunt Pam are going to go play. We will take the baby monitor with us, call if you need anything." I swear he winked at me.

******

We arrived at the restaurant and were escorted into the private room that I had reserved. Sookie declined wine saying that she was breast-feeding. This earned me a startled look from the waiter; they knew I was a vampire here. The restaurant was simply but elegantly decorated with large mirrors, white tablecloths with a single red rose as centerpiece and a small candle one each table. "Eric this place is so beautiful, it looks expensive"

I smiled back and said "we can afford it besides isn't it nice to be out of the house for a few hours?"

"I kind of miss Cameron," she said.

"I took her hand, "come on we will just be gone for a few hours and our son is with two responsible adults. What could go wrong?"

******

I had set up at the table and sat in a chair, not even I dared to use Eric's office for this. Pam approached me wearing a tiny plaid skirt, matching crossed school tie, skintight white shirt, knee socks with penny loafers. Her hair was arranged into two pigtails held in place with two red ribbons. Yum. Her eyes were properly down cast. "Father, you wanted to see me?" she said in a childish voice.

I rose to my full height and looked down at her sternly "It has been brought to my attention that you have been misbehaving and cutting your classes. Measures have to be taken to correct this behaviour."

"Yes, Father I will take any punishment that you decide is necessary."

I held up the school strap, "kiss the strap" she did. "Now extend your hands one at a time, keeping the other one behind your back and humbly ask for six of the best on either of your wicked palms."

Extending her hand. She said, "Please Father, can I have six of the best."

"You don't sound properly humbled" I said sternly.

She said it again in a louder tone and I braced my hand beneath hers and brought it down into the center of her palm in a stinging manner, six times and then repeated it on the other hand. "Thank me for your punishment" she did. "Now take off your panties."

She looked up at me with frightened eyes. I also broke character; Pam is an excellent actress. "My panties, but why? I thought that I had just been punished."

"That was just a warm up, the real punishment shall be on your bare bottom. Now the panties please, or I shall resume this punishment before the entire school."

Trembling she took off her white cotton underwear.

******

I ordered Royal for myself and she ordered the fish special. We talked about us and brought up things from the past that got us both laughing. I finally got her to talk about the sex we had after Clancy's wedding. "I was kind of embarrassed and you didn't call me."

"That was it? I figured that we were beyond such silliness, I would have called if that would have resulted in a repeat performance." I said waggling my eyebrows.

She laughed, "Same old Eric, sex on the brain. I can't believe that we had outdoor sex, that is so not me."

"Well, we were in a pretty isolated area, I doubt anyone saw but a couple of cows"

She laughed.

I turned serious "Sookie, I want you to know, that while I was being tortured that the only thing that kept me going was the thought that I had to tell you that I loved you."

She got sad at the memory "that was awful, I could feel what they were doing to you, but couldn't find you. I broke my heart seeing you like that."

"At least you did find me before they cut anything off or……. did other things to me? Sookie, I never want be separated from you again. I took the ring box out of my pocket and got down on one knee. "Therefore, Sookie Stackhouse will you do me the honour of becoming my wife."

She started crying and said "yes, of course I will marry you."

I slipped the oval cut diamond solitaire platinum on her finger and asked for the waiter to bring her a glass of sparking white grape juice.

******

I had Pam lean over the table and pushed her skirt up, she has such nice tight white ass. I took the strap in my hand and let it fly against her right cheek, she cried out when it made contact leaving a red mark on the pale, pale skin. I kept this up for a while alternating between the two until the pale globes were a fiery red. "Please Father, if you will stop my punishment, I will allow you to have me."

I stopped "Miss Pam, am I to understand that you wish me to break my vow of celibacy so that I might have sex with you in order to end your punishment." She tearfully intoned yes. I undid my pants and shoved myself into her. She squealed and bucked against me I reached forward and stroked her clit in time with my thrusts and was rewarded by her having a huge orgasm. I picked her up and set her on the table and was inside her again.

She bit my neck and sucked my blood just as I was getting close myself, I was fae after all and my blood still has some of the effect on vampires as it did before. She threw back her head and howled.

******

After a great meal and many, many kisses from a super happy Sookie I drove us home quickly wanting to get her back to bed as soon as possible. "Come on Mrs. Northman" I said in a ragged tone, scooped her up and carried her into the house. Then I heard a howling coming from the dining room. Sookie looked alarmed and we quickly went to investigate. There were Pam and John going at it hell bent for leather on our table. He howled himself and I could only assume that he came.

Sookie blushed bright red and averted her eyes. The two of them looked at us and had the good sense to look embarrassed.

"So much for no misbehaving. Some people have to eat on that table." I roared.

John just leered at me and said "what's the matter Lover, you wish I was doing this to you?"


	14. Chapter 14

Okay my friend who has been crashing with us left this morning. The party is over and back to work. This chapter might make you a little sad, but don't worry everything will work out fine in the end. Obsidian

*****

I was on chair duty, sitting there in all my blond magnificence; when there was a blur and I suddenly had a seven foot Caped Crusader on my lap. "Hi John" I said with a world weary sigh.

"How did you know it was me?" he inquired and pressed his lips briefly against mine.

"You are the only seven foot fae vampire I know; it makes you pretty recognizable. Do I really want to know why you are dressed up as Batman? I swear you get your clothes from a costume shop."

"It is Pam's night off, so we went to the fetish masquerade and it had a super hero theme tonight. I went as Batman, Pam went as Robin and we picked up the Joker."

"Really? John, could you do me a favour and get off my lap?" I inquired; noticing the stares that we were getting from all the people in the bar

"I don't know Lover, I like it here" he said writhing against me.

I stood up swiftly dropping him onto his ass. I was rather amused to see Pam walk in, sure enough, dressed as Robin and she did indeed have someone dressed as a latex clad Joker. I wasn't too impressed when he looked me over like a starving dog and said "nice, Mistress does you friend play?" (FYI, in the Bondage and Domination scene asking if someone plays means that you want to know if they are into the scene).

"You don't want to see the sort of games that I play" I said in a warning tone of voice.

John stood up and glared at him "hands off; he is my future lover."

"John, for the last time, I like women, I like the soft pillowy things they have on their chests and I also like that they have a nice warm hole that I can put myself into. Does that make it make it any clearer for you?"

He leered at me and said "I like that too, but men also have a nice warm hole that I can put myself into and yours must feel like heaven" and ran his hand down my chest. I swear I could feel what little colour I had drain from my face.

"John, you go to far sometimes" I said coldly and shoved him away from me.

He blew a kiss at me and said "now don't pout Lover, you won't always say no."

"I have for nine hundred and fifty years. When are you going to give up?"

"When you are writhing and moaning beneath me" he said with an evil grin.

I rolled my eyes 'what an idiot I thought'. Bye the way, you two owe me a new table. Sookie made me throw out the old one."

"It is not like you ate at it or anything" he pointed out.

"No but it is nice to hang out with Sookie while she eats though."

We were interrupted by Sookie, who was accompanied by Sam and Cameron. "Sookie what are you doing here? You shouldn't bring Cameron to the bar."

"Can we go to your office? We need to talk" said Sam; I noticed that Sookie's eyes were swollen from crying. I got a feeling of dread.

I said goodbye to the others, who apparently going to Pam's dungeon and motioned for Sam and Sookie to accompany me.

"What has happened?"

Sookie threw her arms around me and said "I have to go back to Bon Temps, or Niall is going to kill you." I looked at Sam.

"It is true; he doesn't like that she is here with you and contacted me to deliver this message." Sam said in a regretful tone.

I looked at her "you are not leaving, that fucking fairy can go to hell."

She started to cry "I have to leave; if anything ever happened to you I would die too."

"Sookie just give us a few more days, John is working on arranging a meeting with him to start negotiations."

She kissed and handed me Cameron "I'm sorry, but I have to leave and I don't think you should come around for a while."

"So that is it? You said that we would not be separated again."

She held me "As you said it is only a matter of time. I can't put you in any danger, I love you too much."

With a heavy heart I kissed them goodbye and let Sam drive them back to Bon Temps.

Getting home from the bar that night I found myself wandering from room to room feeling like a part of myself was missing. They had permeated my life, in less then a week I had become so accustomed to having them with me that I felt their absence acutely.

I kept on wandering to my bedroom that still smelt of her to the nursery that still smelt of him. My place was far too quiet without them.

While in my dark mood I barely even heard the knock at the door. I finally answered it after a few minutes. John was there in his normal clothes, if neon green pants matched with a bright yellow dress shirt could be considered to be normal."

"Good news, Niall agreed to meet with us next Friday." Then he caught sight of my face and "Eric, are you okay, is something the matter?" He came in the closed the door behind him. I allowed him to take my hand and sit me on the couch.

"They are gone." I told him the story, I was still in a bad mood and didn't even care that when he began stroking my hair.

"We'll get them back" he said in a soothing tone. "Would you like some of my blood? It is good for depression."

I shook my head "no thanks. It isn't a good idea; you would probably just try and take advantage of me."

He shook his head "not like this, Lover." He pulled out his cell phone "Pam, throw the Joker out and get over here to Eric's Sookie is gone and he needs you here."

They spent the rest of the night with me trying to cheer me up and John got his wish and got to sleep with me. Actually Pam did too; all of us in my bed fully clothed. No nothing happened.


	15. Chapter 15

Would anyone like to buy a slightly used husband? He is 39 years old, 6ft. 4", 168 lbs., has brilliant blue eyes and long hair that he dyes purplish-red. I love him until he tracks dried mud all over my freshly washed floor :(

Obsidian

******

The waking the next day with my friends looking at me with such concerned expressions, as if I was considering meeting the sun, just irritated me. I coldly informed them that I was just fine and if they repeated what had occurred the night before, that I would ban them both from Area 5.

They seemed to be glad that I was back to normal and John pointed out that the reason why Pam was invited was that two guys partying with a girl was not so common place amongst vampire and on one would question it. That Pam was invited along as a chaperone of sorts, to safe guard my reputation, made me laugh harder than I had in days.

John left with Pam, but not before informing me that the next time we sleep together it had better be skin on skin and called me Lover; which was actually welcomed for once. I decided I vastly preferred the old flirtatious, mischievous John to the attentive stranger from the night before. I asked him if he needed to borrow some clothing but was informed that my pants were too short for him and also my 34 waist would swim on his 30 inch. Also that this is not the way that he wanst to get into my pants anyway. So I guess we are back to normal.

Once they left I took a boring shower alone and fired up my email. Finding Niall was on MSN, I sent him the following message and had the most juvenile conservation I ever had:

Eric: I am here and not going away.

Niall: YES YOU ARE!!!!!!!!!!

Eric: Make me.

Then I literally flew to Bon Temps. I entered Sookie's house without even knocking. She told me to go, but I flatly refused and told her if we can survive bullets, witches, stakes, weres and bombs. What is a stupid fairy going to do?

She seemed ready to rescind my invitation, so I did what I normally do when she becomes stubborn and reminded her that table top sex can be fun. After that I demanded to see my son and that SHE PUT MY ENGAGEMENT RING BACK ON RIGHT NOW! She led me into the nursery. Cameron did his little happy giggle sound when he saw me. I lifted him out of his crib and said "Daddy's back."

"Eric, this isn't a good idea. What is to prevent Niall from staking you tonight for violating his ultimatum?"

"Fuck him. He is not the boss of us. What is to prevent me from going into his precious fucking fairy realm and kicking his fae ass?"

She actually smiled when I said this.

"No more sneaking around pretending he is Sam's, he is ours and we have proof of that. We have an appointment to meet him next Friday and I would like us to go together and face this as a family does. Will you agree?"

"Yes, let's do this" she agreed determination in her voice.

******

I waited in the shadows while she opened her door. She descended her porch and then I grabbed her from behind, pushed her against the house and stood before her. "Claudine, it has been a while." I could feel my fangs run out from the smell of her.

"John?" she said in a shocked tone.

"Yes, it is. Did you miss me?" I said right into her ear; with my finger I caressed her right cheek.

"You can't be here, you are a vampire now and I can't have anything to do with you."

"Now Claudine, didn't we have some good times together" I said, pressing myself against her and captured her lips with my own. I was rewarded with a soft moan.

Then she tried to push me away "yes, but as I recall it was my brother that you favoured."

"Don't be like that; you are both equally as beautiful and who can resist twins."

"What do you want? You know that I don't screw vamps"

"I know you don't screw anyone; you are trying to become an angel. What I need is information concerning Sookie Stackhouse and you are going to give it to me"

She looked at me with contempt, "I would never betray the Prince to the likes of you."

I leaned over and lightly scraped my fangs against her throat. "You have such a lovely throat and you smell wonderful. It would be a shame if I marked up that lovely skin" I said lightly piercing her throat and allowed myself to lick the one drop that emerged. I shuddered at the taste. She trembled too, but for different reasons. "Now I want to know why Niall is desperate for Sookie to have children that he would go to the trouble of arranging this with a vampire. If that were only meant as a gift to his great-granddaughter a simple love spell and a human male could have achieved this goal. I suspect it is something more."

"Okay" she said still shaking with fright "Sookie's blood is more fae then she realizes, within her blood is a rare strain of magic that can reawaken some powers that are beyond us now that we are too interbred. If the children she produces were to mate with full blooded fae, in time we could return to being as powerful as before. She holds the key to this."

"There, was that so hard. Now why choose Eric?"

"He was the one sleeping with her" Claudine pointed out.

"So than if he was chosen as the sire of her first one, why is Niall trying to keep them apart? They wish to marry and he would willingly sire all the children that she wants."

"Eric's blood has no special properties; Niall allowed him to father the first child as an experiment. For the next he wants a fae hybrid or a full fae to help cultivate the power for future generations"

I looked at her in disgust "I am surprised that you are allowing your friend to be used for this purpose."

She actually looked ashamed for a second "I do what I have to to serve My Lord and further the Fae. Of course you wouldn't remember that, seeing how you disgustingly tainted you are." Then she paused "actually, that could work technically you are still vaguely fae. How would you like to be the father of her next child?"

I pushed back away from the wall "I won't assist you to these ends. She has chosen him and he has chosen her. You make me sick and to think that you think you want to be an angel; disgusting."

I left her and texted to Eric 'I have new information, meet me at Fangtasia tomorrow night' and flew back to Pam's. Of course I can fly, I was fae after all.


	16. Chapter 16

Still adding a few more facts to make the story more interesting. I am getting to the showdown very soon.

Hope you like this chapter and if you need me, look for me in the fan fic Anime section under Ranma ½ reading the Hentai stuff (see definition below). I am such a hentai myself that I have the Japanese Kanji for it tattooed on my right hip. Obsidian

Japanese word for 'pervert' or 'perverted'. In the west it is used a generic term to describe pornographic anime and manga. ...

******

I was in my office and had left instructions with my bouncer that John was to be shown into my office when he arrived. I was very curious about this new information that he claimed to have.

When he did arrive he was dressed in a style that simply screamed "John". Tonight's outfit was a gold lame batwing blouse open to his waist, cream coloured spandex pants and highly polished brown knee length boots. "Nice outfit, did you mug Siegfried or Roy for it?" I inquired.

"Hello Lover," he said, wrapped his arms around me and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

I noticed that he seemed annoyed about something and asked him why.

"Pam is mad at me because she smelled Claudine's scent on me and now she wants to do some sort of commitment ceremony because she got jealous. I think she got the idea from Sookie and yourself."

"Pam wants you to marry her!" I asked incredulously

He shook his head "no, nothing like that. She wants me to commit to me being her only male and she being my only female. So she wants to do some public declaration of this."

I was struggling not to laugh; I so could not picture Pam willingly wearing a wedding dress. "Is she planning to wear white?" I asked in a neutral tone of voice.

"She might" he said in a miffed tone.

"With a white veil by any chance?" still neutrally.

"I don't know, if she wants to I guess. Look I haven't agreed to anything let alone the details."

I decided to leave the topic alone; he seemed rather sensitive about it. "So why did you go to see Claudine."

"I wanted information and she is Sookie's appointed guardian. Where better to get it?" he replied. "I can tell you although she is striving to be an angel, trust me, she is no angel" he finished with a leer.

"Is there anyone you haven't had sex with?" I asked in exasperation.

"You, Gorgeous. At least not yet" he waggled his eyebrows at me and then his fangs were fully out.

To distract him I asked what he learned.

"It is worst then I suspected, Niall is using Sookie towards his own ends" he told about his talk with Claudine and I resolved to keep all Fairy's from Sookie until an agreement could be reached.

"I always thought there was more to her than met the eye, but this is crazy. Niall is even more of a Bastard then I thought." Noticing John bristle a bit "Sorry, I know that you say that you love him still but he is being a jerk and even you have to admit that. Did I tell you that he offered to stake me the night that he met her?"

"Yes, I do admit that he is a bit impulsive and puts himself before others"

"You think!" I said in an incredulous tone of voice. "John I would like to thank you for all the help; I would have never thought of questioning Claudine"

"How would you like to thank me, Lover" he purred and actually ran his hands down his chest and gave himself a squeeze.

"You never quit do you?"

"And I never shall, see you later Lover, I have to see if I can smooth things over with Pam. She jumped me when I got back to her place for smelling like a Fairy and then yelled at me for most of the night for the same reason. Don't worry, even if I do the commitment thing with Pam, I am still allowed men" and with that he blew me a kiss and left my office.

******

I left word that I was not to be disturbed as I was going to Bon Temps that night in my new black _Ford Fusion_.

Sookie was really shocked when I pulled up to her house "What is that?"

"A Ford Fusion, it is one of the safest cars on the road and has a back seat. Yours is having some more safety features installed and will to be ready to be picked up early next week."

"You did not buy me a car!" she said with fire in her eyes.

"Yes, I did, you cannot drive our son around in that bucket of bolts that you call a car. It isn't safe. I checked the trade-in value on that thing and they offered me $250.00. What does that say about your car?" I was getting annoyed myself.

"My car is fine!" she yelled at me.

"Your car has already been in an accident with a vampire and is hard to buy replacement parts for. Just scrap it, you don't need it." I said coolly back. "Look, you are going to be my wife and you will have to get used to my spending money on you; you didn't seem to have a problem with that before we were together." That shut her up.

"What colour?" she said unexpectedly.

"You seem to like yellow a lot, so I chose that colour."

"I suppose that is okay that you bought me that car, but next times ask me before you do something like this. Or I shall use my old car to run over another vampire. You"

"So I am allowed in then, my invitation is still valid?"

"You can come into my house, but we shall have to negotiate my bed. However, Niall did say that you shouldn't be here right?."

"No, Niall said that he didn't want you in Shreveport with me; he said nothing about me coming to Bon Temps to see you. Want to get Cameron and you can test drive this thing?"

"You want me to drive a car that belongs to you? I never thought I would see the day."

"Not the corvette yet, this one I don't really care about" I said wrinkling my nose in disgust at the 'safe family car'.

She laughed "you only have to drive it when we have Cameron with us, relax speed demon."

While we drove, I told her what John revealed to me. That seemed to make her mad.

"Fuck this shit! It isn't bad enough I am telepathic freak, but now I have crazy dormant fae powers that have to be harvested! I tell you honey, if I didn't have Cameron, I would just tell you to vamp me. Can't be a brood mare if I can't breed."

"So let's figure out a game plan for next Friday and get the fuckers off our backs for once and for all."

"Fucking right. We really should stop swearing in front of the baby; we don't want his first word to be unrepeatable."

"I agree. Oh, did I mention that Pam wants John to marry her?"

"WHAT!" cried Sookie and started laughing.


	17. Chapter 17

Finally decided what to do with that weasel Niall. Hope you like it. Obsidian

******

Right before our meeting with Niall, John insisted on us getting together to explain his plan of attack. He did so at my place with a chalkboard that he had found somewhere and used that to illustrate his points.

He was quite unlike his normal self and even I could not keep my eyes off him. He had forsaken his normal attire in favour of a tight long sleeved t-shirt, equally as form fitting black jeans and 20 hole Dr. Martin boots. The tight clothing enhanced the impressive musculature of his upper body and clung to his long legs. This also served to emphasis his small waist and slim hips. He had pulled the top layer of his glistening black hair into a simple ponytail and the rest flowed down his back in soft waves to his hips. This uncovered his delicately pointed ears and drew attention to his preternatural emerald green eyes, long eyelashes, full lips and dangerously pretty features. He had with him a simple leather jacket that he had hung over a chair and his only adornment was three simple gold hoop earrings in each ear. He reminded me of someone dressed that way, but I couldn't think who. However, I kept thinking that he needed a belt buckle for some reason.

He was even acting different, gone were his coquettish way and I believed that this was the first time for us meeting what he once had been: a low born fae who captured the attention of a prince and rose to the highest office available to his kind, who had enough intelligence and political savvy to hold this post for millenniums until he was turned into a vampire.

"These are the rules that he may have violated that if this fails, we can call him before the council of three. They are rather ambiguous however and only partially apply to the situation. Rule number 994.2a was created to prevent the fae of older times from stealing human babies and replacing them with sticks. The main problem being that there are none that actually address anything about interfering with humans or altering vampires. Which would really help in this case. Eric, would you stop gawking like you have never seen me before and pay attention, this is important" he snapped at me as he caught me skimming over his figure like all the rest of us were. Even I thought he looked incredible.

"You have to admit that the rearview is nice. He has the cutest little bubble butt" breathed Sookie, who loves butts. I was trying not to pay attention to that part of him, but naturally found my eyes drawn there when she mentioned it. Yes, it was a nice ass. I caught John smiling at me over his shoulder when he heard this and quickly averted my eyes.

We were joined by Pam, who had Sam with her for some reason.

******

I was presiding over the meeting with Eric, Sookie and Cameron when Pam came in with some short guy with reddish blond hair and bright blue eyes, I could smell shifter on him. I could feel my mouth get tight, Pam is a free agent, but I don't like her with other men unless we are sharing them.

"Hi Pam, who is your friend?" I asked coolly.

She introduced me to Sam, who I was relieved to find out was Sookie's boss and Cameron's guardian as was appointed by Niall.

"What are you two doing here?" I inquired; glad to notice that Pam seemed to appreciate my outfit. I wore it as I was being offered up as a bribe and needed to properly package myself for the event. As Niall insisted I wear nothing but black while I was his consort I can barely tolerate the colour now.

"We are already involved and we want in" replied Sam

"How are you involved Pam?" I inquired

"Eric is my maker, so technically Cameron is my brother" that was the closest Pam is able to really say that she loves someone. She hates possessing residual human emotions. So I just said "welcome aboard."

She kissed me and took a seat on the couch beside Sookie.

"Eric, before Niall gets here, there is another thing we have to discuss. You have to negotiate in this case. I know that your natural tendency is to flex your muscles and go into bezerker mode when you feel annoyed, but that is not going to work in this case. See this book (I showed him the fae 'rule' book which is the size of a phonebook)?" He nodded "Well the fae book of etiquette is twice the size. Let me do the talking unless you are addressed directly."

Everyone was sitting around while I went over last minute details. The door bell rang and Niall was admitted with Claudine as his second.

He took a seat in the chair that I indicated, while Claudine stood over him. I felt his eyes looking me over in an appreciative manner.

"Niall you know why you have been summoned; you have been interfering with lives again that are none of your concern."

He sat forward with a smug expression on his face "Sookie is family to me, so therefore she is a concern of mine."

"Did she at any point request that she be granted a child by this vampire?" I asked indicating Eric.

"Not in so many words, but she did say to Claudine that she wouldn't mind being a mother."

"So she told her friend a secret in confidence and you felt that you had to fulfill this wish."

"That is correct John."

"Then why choose Eric as father? Did she say it had to be him?"

"No, but he is the one that she seemed to be closest to. So I used some experimental magic to achieve her desire."

"Well if your ultimate goal was her happiness, then you won't stand in the way of her marrying the man she loves and the father of her child then?"

"I cannot allow that to happen. Eric is an unsuitable mate for her."

"That is not your choice to make, if he was good enough as sire, it is his child too and they are the ones to make this decision. It is the common right of being a father. However, I was informed by Claudine that your great-granddaughter's happiness was not your goal"

"I will admit that she contains the key to us retrieving powers that have been lost and restoring us to our proper position as fae. However, even if this was not the case, I would not allow Eric interfere in her life any more than he already has."

"You object because Eric is a vampire or that he is not of noble birth?"

"Both, he is cheap he is common and tainted worse than you." I noticed Eric's angry expression at this description and motioned Pam over to him. I glared at him until he looked calm.

"Perhaps we can come to some sort of agreement; I would be willing to offer my services on a contractual basis if you back off and leave all three of them alone." I could tell that he was interested in this idea. I am very talented in bed. He mulled it over for a bit.

"Tempting, it is true, I have never had a vampire before. I might be willing to consider that idea, perhaps with an addition. He looked at Eric when he said this; who flinched.

I shook my head knowing how much he used to like my flowing hair "sorry but he is not included in the offer and you yourself just said that he is an unsuitable companion." I said smoothly.

"Then I don't see why there is any point of continuing. We have need of children who carry her magic for the fae; her love affair with a vampire is irrelevant."

Sam stood up and said "I renounce my title as guardian of this child, it was never mine to assume. Eric is the Father in every sense of the word and should be treated as such.

Niall seemed surprised at being defied "I cannot allow that, he is not worthy. If you renounce your guardianship another shall simply be appointed then. John, you annoy me, I am now glad that I told those vampires how to take you when given the chance. I only wished now that they had killed you like I wanted. Come Claudine, we are done here."

That he arranged for me to be tortured, raped and drained on that faithful night was monstrous. "You did this? Why?" I asked in a soft voice.

"You were unfaithful to me, I don't like that."

"I was never expected to be faithful to you and was under obligation to try and procreate with as many females as possible." Fairies have a hard time reproducing.

*****

When Niall said that to John, it was like I was inside his head feeling his pain, so I went to stand beside him.

"Looks like it is time for Plan B," he said.

"What is that?" We hadn't discussed a Plan B.

"You guys hold him down and I vamp him, it seems that he deserves to lose everything just as I did"

Sookie came up to join us, "isn't there any other solution?" she asked.

Claudine tried to teleport them out but found she couldn't. "What did you do?" she cried.

John smiled at her and said "silvertine, it is an herb that nullifies fae powers, I used my old contacts to get some"

Niall looked at Sookie and said "don't let them to this to me."

She looked at him with contempt "should have though of that before you started to play monopoly with everyone's lives. Do what you have to do, boys. Before I go, I have something to show you. She held up what seemed to be a pregnancy test. "I'm pregnant again, looks like your crazy magic worked on Eric too well."

His eyes got really wide, so did mine; she hadn't told me yet.

John laughed and clapped me on the back "congratulations stud, looks like it was a good thing that you were in a corn field for the year or half of your fang-bangers might have had cute little blond babies. Sam, take Sookie out of here, if Eric gets any of his blood then he will rut her to death; I'm pretty much immune to the effects, I just get a little giggly. Pam, watch Claudine, if she tries to interfere, bite her."

Sam led Sookie out. As soon as they left, I helped hold down Niall while John drained him, then forced Niall to drink from him.

John wiped the blood from his lips and whispered to his ex-lover and betrayer; which are for the most times one and the same. "Welcome to my world" he glanced at me and then said "he will give you no further trouble; he can't". There was blood all over his face, I couldn't really be sure but I think some of it might have been his tears.


	18. Chapter 18

Please don't get mad at me for not having so much Eric and Sookie in this chapter, I will have more in later ones. I wanted to explore the commitment ceremony that Pam has in mind a little further and the sort of personality that she would have according to me based on the books. Warning: not a great chapter, don't feel inspired today

Not reading anime fan fic today, yesterday's mad me cry :(

Friday date night! Cold beer and NTN trivia with my baby. Obsidian

******

Feeling kind of down after the whole thing I retreated to an empty field knowing that Pam is hardly the person to ask for a hug when I need compassion. I rather expected she would simply bitch slap me across the face and tell me to stop acting like a chick.

I allowed myself 5 minutes to sob uncontrollably. I firmly believe that after grieving and pining after someone for 6000 years, that I had the right. Especially if it turned out that they were the one that ultimately betrayed me.

Of course that is the moment that Pam found me and looked at me like I was some kind of freak. A cuddly vampire she is not, however I am. Maybe I am a freak.

"Hi John, what are you doing here?"

Looking away from her "I am just a little out of sorts tonight and thought I wouldn't be very good company for you."

"I brought something to cheer you up" she said and showed me her flogger (whip) and a pair of handcuffs. "I thought that I might bind you to one of these trees" she explained.

I had to laugh at that while I wiped away the last of my blood tears. That Pam, always thinking that sex is a cure all. "Sorry Pam I am not in the mood for that tonight, I promise tomorrow that you can tie me to anything that you want."

"What are you in the mood for tonight? Wait, I think I know; you want Eric sex" she said with a radiant smile.

I was kind of confused as to whether she meant I wanted to have sex with Eric or some kind of sex that he does and told her so.

"Well, you know cuddly sex" she said this like it was taboo. "Maybe I can call Eric and he can hug you, he is good at that" suggested Pam. I tried not to laugh while picturing the look on his face if she was to suggest that idea.

"I think Eric has enough to worry about this evening without having to worry about me too. Like discovering that he is about to be the undead father of a second child and being the only vampire on this planet who will have to use birth control. Pam, I am fine, I will go into the ground tonight and won't burden you with my mood."

She laughed about the idea of Eric having to use birth control and then did something that I never suspected she had in her. She put on her hand on the back of my head and started stroking my hair. I leaned back resting against her knees and willed her to continue. She did. "John, lets go back to my place, we can curl up and watch some TV and then have cuddly sex." I agreed. "If anyone asks you what we did tonight, I put you over my bench and used a strapon. Got it?" I agreed again, she was full of surprises tonight.

We did exactly as she suggested and for once in over 100 years we made love, no props, no role playing and no costuming. It felt really nice to have her slim, cool body under mine, her arms and legs wrapped around me and her face meeting mine kiss for kiss.

After she allowed me to snuggle her, which was again a bit of a shock.

"John, have you thought anymore about the commitment ceremony I suggested" asked Pam, managing to surprise me for the third time that night.

"I'm not sure Pam, it is not like either one of us are the commitment type. Why do you want to anyway?"

She propped her head on her elbow, "I don't know why really, I guess that you are the closest thing that I have ever had to a boyfriend and I want to do something that makes that official. I still remember that after we first sex, you brought me flowers the next night."

"Which you hit me over the head with and called me a pansy" I reminded her gently.

"But I still liked it and I love being with you. I don't expect us to live together, but want to know that wherever I am in the world that you will seek me out."

"I always have, I don't need a ring or blood ceremony for that. Besides I doubt that I would make a good hus…..commitment partner to anyone." I quickly changed my last statement when she glared at me.

"Well, I would like that. I would like a small blood ceremony and a ring and for you to wear one too, just as a gesture that we are together."

I thought about it and weighted the options "okay, why not? But you will have to get used to having cuddly Eric sex with me more often if that is the case. Not to mention having to put up with my grumpy fae vampire child."

"What is going to happen to him?"

"I put him in the spare coffin in Eric's basement with a stake and several bottles of true blood in case he wakes up early. He will get to pick which one he wants when he awakes up tomorrow night. He is done; he will have to meet with the council and resign his position and never be around our kind again. Claudine is the only one that knew of his intentions and about Sookie's wild magic. He had intended to sell her children for breeding purposes to the highest fae bidder. Claudine will keep her mouth shut or we will shut it for her.

******

"Pregnant are you sure?" I could not get over this.

"Yes, I had Dr. Lugwig confirm it. You have an appointment to get your sperm tested next Thursday."

"But it has only been two weeks!"

"Well apparently your homecoming sex hit home hard, that is the way it happens sometimes if you haven't been sexually active for a while."

"I guess we should get married as soon as possible huh?"

"I guess so. I am thinking to do a quick courthouse thing" she replied with a smile.

"Would you like my permission to have an affair with John first?" I was still kind of irked about the attention she had been paying him earlier that night.

"No, why would you like permission?" she said with a laugh.

"Very funny" we were lounging around in bed again naked, but this time Cameron was laying on my chest and her on my shoulder. We had just made love realizing that we could do this whenever we want now.

"He is a lot like you personality wise, but he is not you" she said.

I nodded, that made sense "he makes a pretty crappy vampire"

"How so? He is sweet, kind compassionate, noble and loyal to his friends"

"Not any traits which a self respecting vampire wants to be"

Cameron pulled my hair "still doing that I see" and gently removed it from his tiny fist. "So do you want a girl of boy this time?"

"I would like a girl. What do you think of the name Fiona?"

"Sounds like a drain cleaner. Shouldn't we see what we are having before you give my second son a girly name?" I teased.

She punched me.

I got serious "I guess that it is a good thing that vampires can't normally have children, we really aren't much help with these matters. I can't be there to nurse you through morning sickness or drive you to doctor's appointment and even at night, can't help you out if I have to go into Fangtasia."

"We'll work it out, if human males can do it, so can you. Besides you have been great with Cameron, you are a natural. Just think of all the fun we will have, twice the dirty diapers and everything"

I groaned, looking so forward to it.

"Eric what will happen to Niall now."

"He will awake a hungry newborn vamp; we will have to force blood down his throat at first. Then he will be given the option of committing suicide or remain as he is. If he decides to remain a vampire, John will train him in the skills he will need and stay with him for 100 years. John will have control over him during that time."

"What if he tries retaliating?"

"We are both stronger then him; he would be a fool to try. If he tries to threaten you, then we will stake him."

"So then Beanie is safe" she said putting my hand on her belly.

"Beanie?" I inquired

"Most mothers' have nicknames for their unborn. Cameron's name was Sprout"

"You are a funny woman Miss Stackhouse."

"Just call me Mrs. Northman from now on" and I did, all night long.


	19. Chapter 19

Yes, later then usual, what can I say date night went really late last night. We stayed up listening to Mary Prankster on . If you have never heard of her, please follow this link to her singing. The World is Full of Bastards, I Dated Every One. I love her. Obsidian

.com/watch?v=Sex55dSsqhE

******

When Niall woke up, John and I lashed him to a chair with silver chains, we padded the areas where they touched skin on John's insistence. Niall looked really nice as a vampire with his already pale features, long golden hair and lithe frame. I told John my observation that former fairies make attractive vampires and he said "thank you " in a grim manner. We forced Niall to drink True Bloods through of a straw until his hunger ebbed. Though it didn't seem to help with his other hunger due to the bulge in his pants and his salacious glances at us.

After he was calmed, he asked what we intended to do to him. I told him that he had to choose his fate but before that shouldn't we torture him first as he arranged that quite well both John and I.

"I only did what was necessary, you both seemed to have healed just fine," he said calmly.

"We both healed physically, you never really get over being tortured." I enumerated for his benefit, all that was done to me in the two weeks. Then John described what the vampires did to him. I shivered at his description of the rape that was forced on him many times. That was only threatened in my case. It is one of my worse fears, to be made helpless while someone thrusts themselves into my unwilling body.

"Boo hoo, I feel so sorry for you, " he said sarcastically.

I started towards him but John held me back. "Before we go any further, please tell us how long it will be before Eric becomes sterile again"

Niall shook his head "I don't know, he was supposed to be this way for only one night, I don't know what went wrong."

"There are always condoms" John said to me as if trying to cheer me up.

I turned back to Niall "your choices are to remain a vampire and have John train you for about 100 years or for us to stake you and release you to final death. Choose."

"Yes", John added, "you will get that choice, unlike I ever did." He sounded rather bitter when he said this.

"Just kill me" he said, "I can't live like this and I certainly don't want to live with him again."

I handed John the stake and mallet. He leaned over and kissed the cheek of his former lover and whispered "good bye". He plunged the stake into Niall's chest and stood back watching the body die until there was nothing but ashes.

Seeing the naked pain on his face made me feel helpless, if he were Sookie I would just take her into my arms or take her to bed and comfort her with my body. Pam had told me that John had been in a black place these last couple of days. Acting on instinct, I stepped forward and drew him into my arms. I raised my face and pressed my thin lips against his full ones. He kind of whimpered and kissed me back gently just placing his hands on my shoulders as if I was a virgin that he was trying not to frighten. I parted his lips with my tongue and deepened the kiss just a little. It only went on for a couple of seconds and than he buried his face into my neck. I could feel cool liquid there and stroked his board back while his body shook with suppressed sobs. When it was done I told him where the bathroom was to get himself cleaned up and suggested that he take a shower.

"Are you going to scrub my back, Lover" he purred. I guessed that was his way of saying he felt better and clapped him on the back.

"John, I swear you aren't a vampire, but a trampire" he leered fangily at me and left.

I found Pam and Sookie in the nursery and told them what had transpired. When John joined us, Pam surprised us by looking concerned and pulling him into her arms. She whispered to him something that sounded suspiciously like 'Eric sex" and they left on John's Harley with Pam looking like a child clinging to him by size comparison.

I took Sookie right to bed and was eating her the second she hit the bed, I impatiently ripped her underwear off and slipped my fingers inside her. She moaned and began bucking her hips up to meet my tongue. Not even bothering to undress either one of us, I shoved my pants down and slammed inside her. She met me thrust for thrust and as I rode her hard and insisted on more until we both reached our completion at the same time. Afterwards, I looked down at her.

"I guess we shouldn't make love this hard, I am pretty big and we might hurt the baby."

"You don't mind that we are having another one do you?" she asked with some concern.

I shook my head "of course not, I can't wait to see how you look pregnant. I wasn't here to see the first time. Remember?"

"You should be glad, I got the size of a house, I gained weight everywhere." She described to me how she looked and offered to let me see the pictures that Tara took of her.

"And I can't wait to see it" resting my hand on her now flat belly and kissed it.

Then Cameron started crying so we put ourselves to rights and when to see him. We had an appointment to get married at the courthouse for the next night.

******

We were at Pam's place and she had been riding hard me for over an hour, she was growling at the sensation. I love having sex with another vampire because you don't have to hold back and if you break something it heals right away, unlike a human. Feeling her approaching her climax and feeling myself as well I bucked up against her and both of us cried out.

Normally after Pam just rises after sex and goes to clean herself, not believing in after sex snuggling. So imagine my surprise when she climbed over me and put her head on my shoulder. We lay there entwined together, my dark hair mingling with her blond.


	20. Chapter 20

Hi, I got your PM, no Eric is not turning gay, I just had him kiss John as a way to try and cheer him up. John is bisexual and attracted to Eric, but Eric is straight. He only notices that John is good looking in that vague masculine way that all males do. Obsidian.

Where is everyone? I hardly heard from any of you on chapter 19, pout.

******

I had told Sookie to buy herself a dress to get married in asked her to pick up the rings that I had chosen or else pick alternate ones if she didn't like the style. I had chosen just plain classic half dome platinum wedding bands.

Sookie said she would feel foolish to get married in a white dress being that we already had a child and had another on the way; that she obviously wasn't a virgin. However I pointed out that many brides go to the altar with bulging bellies and they wear white. That is why they make maternity wedding gowns. So in the end she opted for a white strapless prom dress that her friend Tara had in her shop and wore that with a string of pearls that belonged to her grandmother. When Pam found out that she didn't plan to have flowers, she made her a bouquet of red roses and bought her a pair of jeweled combs for her hair. I thought she looked beautiful.

I myself had just opted for a black suit with a white dress shirt and red tie. I knew I looked good in just about anything anyway.

We decided to buck tradition and drove to the Shreveport courthouse together, we had decided that Sookie was going to come live with me and we would rent out her place. And that as she didn't need to work anymore and that she would stay home to look after our children. No, I didn't insist on this before you slam me, she made this decision herself. My original suggestion was that we get a nanny once Beanie was weaned.

******

Pam had gone mad; she had insisted on french braiding my hair for Eric and Sookie's wedding and brushing it out herself. I told her that I wasn't an invalid and was perfectly capable of brushing my own hair. But allowed her to seat me and brush the wet tangles from my flowing mane. It can be a pain in the butt to have hair this long sometimes. It felt nice to having her play with it. She laughed at me when I moaned. Once it was dry she sectioned it off and braided it down my back.

She surprised me by presenting me with a suit that she had picked out for me for the occasion. It was plain black with a white dress shirt and ice blue tie. I was wondering about the colour of the tie until I saw that she had on a 1950s style ice blue taffeta prom dress, that she probably had had since the 1950s. I normally tend to avoid wearing blue, it looks odd with my unique eye colour.

I pointed out that courthouse weddings were usually pretty causal and that the last one I went to, both the bride and the groom wore jeans and a t-shirt. Pam looked worried and hastily called Eric, knowing well that his attire of choice is normally that. I laughed when she said to him in the most respectful tone ever. "Master, you had better NOT be getting married in jeans and a t-shirt" She seemed relieved to find out he was wearing a suit.

I got dressed and helped her make the bouquet for Sookie. Pam proclaimed me as looking good enough to eat. Then we were on our way.

We got to the courthouse before Eric and Sookie and were mistaken for them until I pointed out that we were both vampires and only human-vamp couples are allowed to legally marry. The clerk seemed perplexed that they hadn't thought about making it legal for vamp-vamp couples to marry and apologized profusely. I assured him that it was completely weird for vampires to have more than a one night stand together and only the truly bizarre want longer. I said this while looking at Pam.

******

We arrived at the courthouse and I was a little disappointed by the plain little room that we were to get married in. I suggested that we have it elsewhere. Sookie said that she just wanted to marry me and would do so in Wal Mart if it had to be. John took the car seat from me while Pam whisked Sookie into the washroom to put her hair combs in and give her a last minute inspection. It was funny how into the marriage Pam was getting. Sookie was nervous but radiant and to tell you the truth, so was I. The other people waiting seemed surprised that we had a baby with us and I teased Sookie that we should have waited until she was visibly pregnant for shock value.

I kept expecting for some Fairy to pop out of nowhere and prevent our getting married, but John assured me that the only one who was likely to do that was Claudine and he had left a message that he would finish what he started the last time if she tried.

We were joined by Sam, Amelia, Tara and JB who had opted to attend.

The judge came in wearing his robe and introduced himself. There was a bit of confusion for a second, as he seemed to think that he was marrying Pam to John, but that was straightened out in a flash.

We introduced ourselves to him and then our son. He seemed surprised when we did this but refrained from commenting. Cameron was growing into his looks and starting to look a lot like me.

The ceremony itself was short and sweet and Sookie gazed up at me through out the entire thing. She looked so beautiful and so happy. I glanced at Pam and noticed that she had a single blood tear running down her cheek and that she was holding John's hand.

When we kissed I flew us up into the air and spun her around, she loves when I fly with her. Then we were presented as Mr. and Mrs. Northman. Not a single Fairy showed up.

Everyone insisted on kissing the bride then John kissed me on the cheek, earning a strange glance from the Judge.

I treated everyone to dinner at the restaurant that I proposed to her at and had reserved the private room again. I managed to persuade her to have a single glass of champagne and told her I would personally help her pump out the bad milk later. She blushed at this.

I love being married.


	21. Chapter 21

Back to work, no that wasn't the last chapter. Had a nice weekend, my friend crashed again and we discussed my fan fiction over some wine, which led us to doing the Swedish Chef imitations from the Muppet Show because Eric is Swedish. It was very silly. Bork, Bork, Bork Obsidian

Wanda W, I enjoy getting your reviews (and everyone else too, thank you I love you all) and think that it is cool that you are into the X-Men. I am into Dexter, Red Dwarf, Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Phillipa Gregory and the Tudors (all books or shows). Yes, I have been told I have a silly sense of humour.

******

It has been two months since we got married and Sookie is starting to show, I told her that I can't wait to see how big her belly will get and she called me a bloody sadist.

Cameron is huge now and starting to grow regular hair, it was not much of a shock to discover that it is blond. People on the street comment on how cute my son is and how much he looks like me. Then they realize that I am a vampire, it is very amusing.

I am trying to be as attentive a husband as possible and constantly look up facts about pregnancy which I tell Sookie about and she thanks me, she wishes she knew that the first time that she was pregnant.

She is a little grumpy these days but rarely gets morning sickness and we were told that her pregnancy is progressing normally.

My sperm was tested and sure enough, I have live swimmers now in an undead body. Dr. Ludwig gave me a stern lecture on birth control and demonstrated how to put a condom on by rolling it onto banana. I had never saw a condom up close before and can't say that I liked the look of them. I told her that I am only having sex with my wife, so there is little danger of a population explosion caused by yours truly and she countered by asking me how many children do I actually want.

The area 5 vampires seem very curious about our pregnancy and ask all sorts of questions to the point I believe that one of them is running a betting pool. They have even started picking up strange combinations of human food for Sookie to see if this will help with pregnancy craving.

Pam is a little sad these days because although John agreed to the commitment ceremony, he keeps refusing to set a date and visibly flinches when someone calls it a wedding. I am supposed to be the 'priest' for the event and feel kind of sorry for Pam. I tried talking to him and told him that being married it great. He asked me not to say that word. I suggested that if he gets her and engagement ring so that he might be able to buy himself some time. He said I wasn't helping.

******

I was on door duty again carding stupid mortals, you really can't tell their ages and decided to take a break and go inside.

I was enjoying myself immensely; I love to watch Eric and John in action. Eric is on his throne looking gorgeous as ever and John took a seat across the bar from him and is imitating his posture. The fang-bangers are looking from one to the other and when Eric glares at him, John starts blowing him kisses. These two really bring out the worst in each other. They are so similar personality wise it is hysterical, but John has more a juvenile sense of humour.

Finally Eric gets so irritated with John that he leaps off his throne and starts to chase him around the bar Tom and Jerry style. However John starts to run as slow as possible and says "come get me lover". Which ends up with the Eric roaring into his face, which is the wrong thing to do; John just leans over and kisses him on the mouth. Even I cannot stop laughing at their antics.

I was laughing until some fang-banger pulls John away from Eric and starts kissing him. Before I knew what I was doing, I knocked the bitch away from him and ordered her to leave.

******

I just stood there stunned looking down at the girl that Pam had knocked out of my arms "Pam what are you doing?"

She stared at me and ran out the back door.

Eric looked just as stunned as me and then said "go after her".

I got outside just in time to see her driving away in her Honda.

Of course this had to be one of the times that I caught a ride with her, so I flew to her place. I found her lying in bed just staring at the ceiling. I took her into my arms and kissed her tenderly, she allowed me to.

"Pam, what is wrong?" I asked her gently.

"I don't like seeing you with other girls" she said in a hollow voice.

"Pam that wasn't a girl, it was more like lunch to me. I do have to eat you know."

"I know, I just got jealous"

"Hey I get jealous seeing you with other guys too."

"Really?" she seemed surprised by this.

"Is that why you are so set on this commitment ceremony thing?"

She nodded and looked at me sadly.

"Pam I am no prize, I am weird by vampire standards and horrible at relationships. I would say for you to ask Niall, but obviously you can't. He chose to die rather then having to live with me again and quite frankly, I can't blame him."

"You're not so bad; I miss you when you aren't around."

"Pam how often do I visit?"

"A couple times a years"

"Do you know how often I used to visit Eric before you were around?"

"No"

"Ever ten years and that was just to flirt with him. Pam, I like Eric and lust him as well but you are what keeps me coming back and if you want to have your ceremony, then we will."

"Do you want to?"

I had taken Eric advice and got her a ring, so I went and got it and actually got down on one knee. "Will you Pam do me the honour of accepting me as your commitment partner?"

She laughed and said "Yes, I do"

******

Pam called me just as I was feeding Cameron and apologized about the mishap at the bar.

She told me that John gave her a ring and that they planned for a small ceremony two weeks from now.

I couldn't resist waking Sookie to tell her the news; she had a good chuckle and then jumped me. Since she has been pregnant her sex drive is through the roof. You don't hear me complaining.


	22. Chapter 22

Does anyone else's husband have sock elves that transport their dirty socks into the laundry hamper from the floor while they sleep? Grrrrr Obsidian

******

A lone biker pulled into the parking lot of Fangtasia, he was very tall and wore so much metal on his black leather jacket that it could have stood up on its own. He set up the kick stand of his metal clad Harley Davison, eased off his motorcycle and pulled off his helmet. Masses of long blond curls tumbled down his well toned chiseled body. He lit up a cigarette and regarded the building itself with the leather clad bouncer in front of it. "What a dump" is all he said.

******

I walked into the bar looking for my idiot half brother that my father insist that I check on while I was in this backwards neck of the woods and couldn't see him. So I decided to ask someone about him. I spotted some blond pretty boy sitting on some stupid looking throne who seemed like he owned the joint. He didn't look like he completely lacked intelligence, so I got up onto the little stage and asked him "hey Hillbilly, have you seen Loki tonight? I understand that he has been hanging around this dive."

******

"Who are you to presume to speak with me?" the insolence of this creature that he would dare approach me without invitation and insult my bar. Intolerable.

******

"I do, he is pretty hard to miss; he has long black hair, green eyes and is seven feet tall. Now do you think that you can remember that or was your mother and father as being brother and sister scrambled your brain?" This guy seemed even less intelligent then most vampires I have met.

******

"Perhaps you would care to leave; I don't see the point of talking to someone so insulting."

"Hey I know who that is; it is Thor from WWF, the famous wrestler!" chimed in a fang-banger

******

All I had to do was see the broad shoulders and long blond hair of the person exchanging angry words with Eric and know who it was instantly. "Hi Thor, has Dad sent you to check on me again?" About every 1000 years our father remembers about me and sends Thor to see how I am doing. Thor hates being forced to be his gofer and hates me anyway. I don't tend to return any of Dad's communications, we aren't a close family.

"John who is this rude person who insults me and my bar?" demanded Eric

"This is my half brother, Thor."

"Yes, I was just informed that he is some wrestler or something" he said impatiently.

"I don't think that you understand; he is THE Thor" I was surprised when Eric kneeled before Thor "Yeesh Lover, had a realized that the way to get you on your knees before me was to pretend to be him, I would have done it. It is that you just prefer blonds?"

"Loki, who is this douche and why is he kneeling before me? What are you doing in this dive anyway?" asked Thor looking down at Eric with comtempt.

"That is Eric, he was an ancient Viking in life; he is my friend and owner of this dive as you call it" I explained.

"Wow, those suckers really did believe in anything. Would you stand up man, I am not the same sort of Fairy that Loki is!"

Eric rose to his feet with a look of awe on his face "could I have your autograph?" he said in so humble a voice I was embarrassed for him.

"Eric he really is nothing special and a considerable jerk as well."

When Pam joined us, Thor glanced at her and said "Hi Pam." She smiled at him politely and inclined her head.

"You know Pam?" I inquired, not liking the sound of this at all. Family reunions are hell on me. Eric frowned at the familiarity as well.

"Sure, I met her about 120 years ago; man the stuff that we got into that night! What Supe guy hasn't heard of Pervy Pam?" and Thor replied and leered at her. It took all of my self control not to grab her against me caveman style and say "Ugh, my woman."

"You have seen your brother, now I suggest that you leave" said Eric in a cold voice.

******

I had done my part and found out that he indeed was still alive in terms of vamps and could now return to my hotel where Brunette and Redhead were waiting for my hot body. According to the terms of my contract, whenever I wrestle in a city, I must have a blond, brunette and redhead (I call them all simply by their hair colour) waiting at the hotel room for me to relieve my sexual tension. However they fucked up this time and Blond's grandmother just died, so I got sick of her whining and kicked her out. I was looking over Pam and thought she might serve to take her place. "You still got that whip, Sugar?" I asked her.

She regarded me coldly and said, "I have to go back to overseeing inventory" and put her arms around Loki's neck and kissed him. Ah, so my little bro has himself a girlfriend.

Eric left with Pam and I asked Loki "what got his panties in a twist?"

"Pam is his child and you just insulted her. When are you going to learn to think before you speak" he admonished.

Crossing my arms over my chest I asked "what is she to you, then". I noticed his look of quiet rage and it just clicked into place "You love her!" I exclaimed.

******

Of course when he announced this the bar was between songs and completely silent causing all eyes to swivel our way. "That is none of your concern" I said coldly. Great, now I was channeling Eric. When he goes into cold mode, it means that he is about to lose control of his emotions and vanishes. Wish I could do that too right now.

He smirked and said "you do, what a loser. Well I saw you and will tell that to Dad. See you in another 1000 years." I watched a he roared off on his own Harley and started thinking about what he said.

Did I love Pam? I wasn't sure. My other relationships (for lack of a better word to call them) had been very brief, I was as kind to them as possible during the time, but it always ended with me explaining that I had no love to give them. I know that I loved Niall and never really got over it I guess. Is this what a rebound relationship feels like?

Pam had been the only constant in my life and I believed that it was because we had a similar sense of humour, loved to experiment sexually and never made demands of each other. Yet, things had changed lately; she had become closer to me and actually sought out physical affection unlike before. In the two weeks after Niall's final death I had kind of shut down and retreated inside myself, I kept telling her everyday that I should leave, but she kept threatening to do nasty things to my motorcycle if I left (I love my Harley, it is my favourite one). She was there with joke and caresses to try and draw me out.

I don't normally spend a lot of time in one place, I live in a converted warehouse in Florida and own a famous record label and well as other businesses. I insist on scoping out the bands myself, so I travel a lot.

What the hell am I going to do? Pam doesn't deserve to have one of the worst vampires in the world being heart sick over her. She certainly could never return my feelings.

Looks like I should have the commitment ceremony and get the hell out of Dodge until I return to normal. Whenever that will be; it did take me over 6000 years to get over the first one I loved after all.


	23. Chapter 23

MY TWO CENTS:

Sorry about the confusion about yesterday's chapter, I should have introduced it better. In one interpretation of the Norse God myths, Loki and Thor are brothers and Thor can't stand him. Eric was bowing because he would have worshipped him back then. I wasn't writing them from the standpoint that they are actually the gods themselves, but more from a science fiction fantasy where they are just a long lived race that people thought were gods. It is kind of transformation of myths through time ie. Hercules=Superman.

I also apologize for the lack of Eric in my writing lately, but I don't really know about how to write about them having really small children in an entertaining manner, I have never experienced this other then with friend's babies. So, I can write complex relationships rather well where there is lack of communication (all too well, sob sob), but not married people with small children. Thank you Ms. Grant for suggesting ideas to help me.

John I like to write and am just building him up for now until the ceremony, and then he won't be around so much. I am trying to devise what sort of male Pam would fall for, not an easy task. She never even loved Eric keep in mind.

If you think chapter 22 was weird, you should see the one that I wrote yesterday for my own amusement where Eric offs my least favourite character from my fav anime series. I enjoyed that. I like to think I write a combo of CH and Douglas Adams, without the true creativity of either. My Eric isn't sexy, sexy or violent, but he is entertaining. What can I say? The two fictional characters I would love to have a drink with are Zaphod Beeblebrox …… and Eric. Obsidian

******

Deciding that Sookie needed a night out, we called a human sitter not wanting to lose anymore tables. She seemed a little nervous about going out without Cameron, but I assured her the he would be just fine.

We had decided on a night of dinner and dancing and she wore one of her new outfits that she am Pam picked out when they last went shopping together. This one was pale blue and just showed off her cute little baby bump. I reminded myself not to say anything this, just in case this upset her. Apparently woman, unless they are visibly pregnant don't like such comments. Believe me, I found that out the hard way.

She has been busy when I have to sleep and apparently we are getting a pool, she surprised me by picking up the brochures herself. Apparently something called aqua fit is good for pregnant women. First she accepted the car without too much of a fight and now this. Will wonders never cease?

Since Cam wasn't coming with us I was able to drive the corvette but still found myself going the speed limit. I was too concerned about the other baby on board to go fast. I truly hate driving my car at this speed. Sookie looked smug. "What's the matter Lead Foot, did you just put a new engine in (A.N. if you put a new engine in a car, they recommend that you go slowly for a little while)."

"No, this is the results of driving with my pregnant wife." I said through clenched teeth.

"Well, honey you are in luck, if it will make you drive responsibly then you have my permission to get me pregnant every year." I kind of blanched at that image.

"Speaking of which we had better choose a form of birth control or that will be happening every year."

"I thought I would go on the pill, it is very effective and that way we wouldn't have to worry about the Gracious Plenty breaking condoms. Though they do make a type of condom that is meant for larger guys, they are called Trojan Large" she said eying my crotch.

"So I not only will have to be the only vampire in the world that has to use birth control, but I have to buy large sized condoms. Lovely" I said dubiously.

"Then there is the ultrasound that we are doing in a couple of weeks, so we can hopefully find out if that she is actually a she."

I glanced at her "why not another boy?" I inquired.

"Well, it would be fun to have someone to teach my Gran's recipes to while you are teaching the boys to sword fight" she teased.

"You have double standards. I understand that boys these days know how to cook too, even I figured out how".

The restaurant that I chose was a very small one with muted earth tones, soft lighting and the only splash of colour was the dark red tablecloths. It only had tables meant for two people and was the perfect setting for a romantic night. She loved it.

At the restaurant we were shown to our table and ordered our meals, I touched my true blood to her ginger ale and said "to us".

She smiled at me and took a sip.

"So the question is, when we can go on honeymoon?"

She started laughing so hard she almost spit out her drink "honey, it is almost impossible to travel with a baby so small, look at all the stuff we have to bring to Pam's place just for one evening."

I nodded, remembering all to well the fun, fun time of having to set up a temporary nursery where there was none.

"Well, times that hassled by 100 and you just about have your answer. It wouldn't be too bad if I was just pregnant, but having two babies practically back to back is going to make travel almost impossible."

I thought about the implications of this statement "I guess I better tell the King about our family soon or else we could have trouble. Imagine if we get summoned when you can't travel because you are too close to term."

"Sure, tell him, we have proof that you are their father and the sperm test if he questions our odd situation."

"And an odd situation it is" I finished with a grin and took her left hand with my own looking at our matching wedding bands." Feeling silly I pressed her ring against my own and said "Wonder Twins powers, activate! (A.N. you don't know who they are, google 'em. Sid).

We had a good time and decided to go dancing for a little while.

The same restaurant owned a dance club a block over and the cover charge was added to your bill if you wished to relocated to there for dancing.

Sookie loved to dance and we move and sway well together. I have always enjoyed holding her close like this and enjoyed it more with the feeling of Beanie pressing against me too. When did I become so sentimental?

About 11pm Sookie started falling asleep at the table, so I insisted we go home. I managed to keep her awake long enough for her to remove her makeup and brush her teeth before tucking her into bed.

I went to pay the babysitter that the Supe agency sent over and asked if Cameron was any trouble. I hadn't been impressed with the sitter, she dressed a lot like Elvira Mistress of the Dark and I almost suggested that we cancel our plans on meeting her. However Sookie said she came highly recommended and insisted on our trusting her.

"Of course not, he was an angel. I used to sit for a shifter kid; he would turn into a cactus every time I hugged him. After him a human child is a walk in the park."

I asked her if she found our situation strange.

She scratched her head "nah, I have met so many mixes of human and Supes children that nothing surprises me anymore."

I asked what her talent was and she explained that she was a half witch on her mother's side and had only minor powers.

"Like what?" I asked.

"Mute spells for babies" She said with a grin.

"Can you teach me that one?" I asked when my possibly telepathic son started to make his 'come pay attention to me, Daddy' cry.

She snapped her fingers and produced a card. "No, but I can do this. Your wife is pregnant right?" I nodded and she handed it to me. "I do full time work as a nanny to couples such as yourselves that are in unique situations. If you are interested the agency can forward you my resume and references."

I read her card "Allison Crowley, any relation to….?"

She winced, 'no, proof that my parents have a stupid sense of humour."

Cameron was now making baby talk at me; I then tried to picture two babies making the same sound at the same time. "I'll talk to my wife and let you know."


	24. Chapter 24

Wow, was my intro wordy or what yesterday? Don't worry I shall keep this one brief. No, John is not going to disappear, just not be so much in the foreground. Though I am thinking of writing a one-shot Honeymoon thing with him and Pam. I will get Eric and Sookie's puppies talking and then I shouldn't be so stuck what to write about them. Anyone want to bet on what Pam is going to wear for her ceremony, I am so tempted to have her show up in full white bridal gown, bouquet and veil. Obsidian.

******

A week after our night out I woke to find a huge hole in our backyard. I was expecting this, we had approved of the quote that we received for the pool and decided on the type we wanted.

"That is one huge hole" I commented upon receiving my wake up kiss.

"It made a huge noise too, good thing you sleep like the dead (ha ha). I took Cameron to visit Sam and Tara in Bon Temps today just to get out of the house"

"Good visit?" I asked.

"Sure, the renovations on Gran's house are coming along nicely and I stopped into the reality office; we had our first inquiry about renting it. Then Sam changed into Dean the Dog and I helped Cameron ride him around, he really seemed to enjoy it." She handed me my mail and I started going through it.

"I thought I smelled shifter in the air" I commented and started for the nursery when the wee possible-telepath sensed I was up. Naturally that meant I was being summoned to attend to him.

Pam had inadvertently chosen the theme for the nursery: panda bears. Sookie thought that Pam's gift was so cute that now the nursery is awash with them. We get them from Sookie's friends, Pam, John and even the rest of the area 5 vampires. I keep on telling her that we should tell them to stop or there will be no panda bears left in China.

I had just picked him up to carry him into the living room when I heard Sookie yell "fuck!"

"Sook, we agreed, no language like that in front of Cameron" I admonished.

She looked chagrined "I just opened an invitation addressed to both of us. Guess which King wants us to attend a ball in his honour in Nevada? It takes place in two weeks"

I sighed "see, I told you that we should have told him sooner. Now we will have to go and this will shock him. He hates information being kept from him."

"I really don't see how this is any of his business it is hardly committing treason to have a baby."

"No, but I am his Sherriff and this is certainly a revelation in vampire circles" I pointed out to her.

She sighed, "You vampires and your silly politics, it is not like I am giving birth to Buffy the Vampire Slayer or anyone like that. Though it would be kind of ironic if I was"

"I suggest that before we make an appointment to meet with the King and introduce him to Cameron. We can fly there at night and return the next day. I would just call him, but I don't really think he would believe me without meeting Beanie and him." I explained, raising one eyebrow at her.

'That sounds like a good idea, but it can't be this weekend because of the wed…commitment ceremony."

"How safe for babies is Air Anubis?" asked Sookie

"I doubt that they deal with a lot of babies considering it is an airline who specialize in transporting vampires."

"Well, we had better check with that or else you will have to travel with them while I use a regular commercial airline. Not to mention any of the hotels we choose will have to know of our needs ahead of time."

I shook my head "here I thought travelling as a vampire was hard enough."

"You had better get used to this until our children are about 18" she informed me.

"Speaking of the ceremony, John wants to know what Pam is planning to wear. He thought that you might know, considering you are going to be Pam's commitment maid."

"I have no clue; she picked out a blue pastel dress for me and refused to tell me."

I rolled my eyes "this is going to be a hell of an event."

******

Pam and I had advance passes for a new Fetish bar opening in Shreveport called The Red Fanny and had she had taken the night off so we could go to it. The opening theme was Fairytales, ironic huh? So we had decided to go as Little Bo Peep and a Sheep. Guess which who was who? I am not telling. So imagine my surprise when she decided that she would rather stay in that night with me and rent movies. Well, it was her place and I wasn't going to argue. I accompanied her to Block Buster and tried not to laugh out loud when she chose Interview with a Vampire and Dracula.

"You don't see enough vampires on a daily basis?" I asked amused.

"Hollywood interpretations of us always crack me up."

I grabbed some blood out of the fridge, while she put on the movie on and went to sit on the armchair, but she motioned for me to sit beside her on the couch. I was not longer shocked by the new, cuddly Pam and didn't even think anything of it when she put her head on my shoulder. I put my arm around her. "Too bad we can't have popcorn; I always wanted to try that stuff" I observed. I was really enjoying holding her while she stroked my chest.

"That stuff looks disgusting; I don't think we are missing much." She tugged my head forward by my hair and kissed me. Then she went back to watching the movie. I sat there with a goofy grin on my face like a 14 year old male with his first crush; a 14 year old _virgin male._ I managed to school my features pretty fast before she noticed.

We watched Interview first and she started teasing me throughout. "I thought you said you wanted to watch the movie?" I said in a husky voice. By now what clothing hadn't been impatiently removed was pretty much in tatters.

"Fuck it, they aren't due back for a week, we can watch them later" She said in the same tone of voice. While she torn the rest of my clothes off.

I slid down the length of the pale slim body and gently parted her already damp folds, I watched as she thrashed her head, her eyes opening wide when my tongue hit a particularly sensitive spot.

She dragged me up by my hair and hissed when I thrust myself inside her. She likes well endowed men as we can hit places most men only hint at, or so she told me. I reveled in the feeling of her tight cool walls around me and pounded into her. She loved it!

Knowing the high that my blood gives her, I ripped open my wrist with my fangs and put it to her lips. The blood lust hit us both of us, then the fae intoxication hit her and she screamed. I felt her climax approach and matched hers with one of my own. Just as it hit her, she screamed "Oh fuck, I love you John!"

"I love you too, Pam" I groaned at my own completion.

I collapsed and then I froze realizing what had just transpired. I raised my green eyes to meet her blue and both us saw our own panic reflected there in the others.


	25. Chapter 25

This is the continuation of yesterday's chapter. I couldn't leave one couple making travel plans and the other staring fearfully into each other's eyes. Obsidian

Btw, decided on the wedding outfit, think 1930.

Jadajuice-do you mind if I steal your ceremony idea? That is better then the one I came up with.

roses3425-you are close with the sheath dress idea :)

Karen-sorry accidently deleted your PM, just wanted to tell you that there is a bar in Ottawa, Ontario (I am from that area originally) called Zaphod Beeblebrox and they do serve a drink called the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster. It is some kind of pear tasting thing, but obviously does have the same effect as the real thing=The guide states that the effect of one is like having your brain smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick. 42-Okay Sid, stop geeking (sorry everyone)

******

I called Felipe de Castro's 'office' and asked to talk with him personally. After much hemming and hawing Sandy finally put me through. I humbly requested that I be granted a personal interview early next week with him, myself and my bonded/wife. Hearing me being so deferential, unlike my usual self, Sookie kept on rolling her eyes and pretended to blow raspberries.

"Yes Eric, would Tuesday at 8pm suit you?" asked Felipe

"That would be just fine, Your Highness."

"I wished to personally congratulate you on your marriage to Mez Stackhouse. I trust that you received the gift of candle sticks that I sent to honour the occasion?"

"Yes, Your Grace, Mrs. Northman and I were extremely grateful to receive so thoughtful a gift. I trust that you got the thank you card that we sent in return?" Sookie had hated the candlesticks and pronounced them to be butt ugly.

"Ah yes, I did receive that but it is nice to have direct communication. No? Sandy please leave me" he commanded.

In a softer tone he said "Eric, I am not one to make apologies to anyone, but I do feel the need to extend one to you for the absurdity of your last assignment. It was like I was not in my correct mind and felt compelled to make you remain against my better judgment."

"I accept your apology and have new information concerning that; however I should like to discuss that in person during our meeting" this was code for I think someone might be listening.

"Very well, I shall see yourself and the lovely Sookie next Tuesday" he said and then he hung up.

Sookie laughed at me for humbling myself so much; until I took her to bed and showed her how humble I actually was. I am a panic in bed and I know it!

I called Air Anubis to get additional information about whether they were equipped to deal with a vampire-human couple traveling with an infant.

"Anubis airlines" said a bored sounding voice.

Being a frequent flyer with them I identified myself and he pulled up my profile. "How many will be travelling with you?" he inquired.

"I have two travelling with me and we shall need three actual seats for departure and two with a coffin on return the next day. Could you please outline for me the safety features that you offer for a six-month-old?

"We have the tightest security possible and are careful to label all coffins so there are never any mishaps."

"No I meant, we just bought a special chair for him called a sit-n-stroll and I need to know that your seatbelts could correctly hold this in place during turbulence."

"Special chair?" he seemed confused.

"Yes and will any other passengers object to my wife breastfeeding him in the washroom? She is little shy about breastfeeding in public." I explained

"You guys do that?" he asked in an incredulous voice

I looked at the phone and wondered if this shift was manned by mental patients "Well, they don't have a lot of teeth when they are young and have to eat somehow" I explained impatiently. "Does your airline not get a lot of couples travelling with babies?"

"Oh, he is a baby; I thought that you meant a newly turned vampire. Not a problem we abide by all safety standards and can promise you and yours a safe flight.

I went ahead and booked the flight and decided to use the vampire hotel that he recommended.

I had to go through the same thing all over again when I told them I needed vampire-human room and could I rent a travel cot from them or do I have to bring my own.

******

I wrenched myself off Pam as if she scalded me and just stared at her. I started running my fingers through my hair which is a habit for when I get nervous, then I remembered how Thor always said this habit made me look 'girly' and stopped.

I suddenly felt really exposed and vulnerable, which was ridiculous, Pam had seen me naked a million times and we just had sex. In fact, I think that she has discovered areas of my body that I didn't know existed.

She stared back at me and seemed to feel about the same. She seemed to trying to shrink into herself. When I saw that, I went into her bedroom to retrieve our bathrobes. Pam got us matching ones for our 'anniversary' last year, emerald green for me and pastel blue for her. I put mine on, put her's around her. I took a seat across from her and asked her gently "How long?"

"About 50 years I think" she replied refusing to look at me. "You?"

"I honestly don't know. I didn't even realize the truth until my idiot brother pointed it out to me. If a clod like Thor can see it, then probably everyone else can see it but…..."

"Us" she finished for me.

"Pam you really shouldn't to be with me, you are smart, you are beautiful and so, so sexy."

"Isn't it my choice whom I choose to be with?" she seemed annoyed.

"I meant it when I said I was a freak. Fairies aren't meant to be vampires; I have to worry about drainers and other vampires wanting to drain me for fae intoxication. That is why I move around a lot, I can use my limited residual magic to shield my scent but only for so long, after that I pretty much have to avoid being with others of our kind."

"Why aren't I affected?"

"I willingly share blood with you, so you have built up a tolerance to the draw" I explained. "We are safe together, but you would have to forsake the company of other vampires in large doses to remain that way. Seeing you are half owner of a vampire bar; that would be kind of hard."

She leaned forward "Why didn't you tell me any of this before?"

I smiled sadly "I though if I told you the truth that you might not want to see me again. The thought of it terrified me, I know it was selfish, but I cared about you too much to give you up."

"So you just can't be around other vampires besides me for very long. No big deal, you don't have to hang out a Fangtasia all night and we don't tend to go to exclusive vampire events anyway. We could still make it work."

I stood up and drew her to her feet. I looked into her eyes "Pam, I do love you, but I can't let you change your life for me. I am not worth it. It is not like I have even been any fun to be around lately anyway."

"Feh, you haven't been that bad and you helped our friends out. If I found you irritating, I would have asked you to leave already."

"I have been a whiny, pouty, clingy little bitch and the only thing I have been is in your way. I should have left long ago." I leaned down and kissed her cheek. "I better go pack."

I was expecting her to argue with me or to get mad. What I wasn't expecting was for her to backhand me; I was so stunned I fell onto the couch.

She put her face about two inches from mine and roared "I am sick to death of your self-sacrificing bullshit. Where the hell do you get off tell me what to do? I have plenty of men wanting to date me and I choose you!"

"But Pam......"

"Don't interrupt me!" she grabbed the collar of my robe and started shaking me. "You are right; you are acting like a bitch! A dumb bitch. You are not in my way, I want you here with me because I LOVE YOU!" she shrieked

"But......" I started.

"DO YOU WANT ME TO SLAP YOU AGAIN? NOW SHUT UP AND LET ME TALK"

I fell silent; it is pointless to argue against her when she gets like this. So I sat back and crossed my arms.

"That's better" she said sitting down into my lap. "Now do you not want to be with me?" she asked in a more reasonable tone.

"Of course I do! It is just that......"

She covered my mouth with her hand "no more excuses" she admonished.

"Do you really want to leave?"

I took her hand away from my mouth "no, I don't want to leave." I whispered and slipped my arms around her.

"Good, because we are getting married on Saturday and you have to be there. I swear if you don't show, I will drag you there myself in silver chains!" her expression brooked no arguments. Normally when someone said that word to me, I get a strange rush of fear. But in this case I felt a warm glow.

"I will be there. But, I can't always be here with you; I have a company to run."

"Hey, as long as you come back, we are all good" she said stroking my cheek with her soft pale fingers.

"You know that this isn't legal binding, I could run away whenever I want" I teased

"You wouldn't dare, husband darling" she said and started to kiss me.

I carried her to bed and we made love. I have done everything there is possible to do sexually over 6000 years that are within my loose moral codes, but making love to her at that moment was the most erotic thing I ever done.


	26. Chapter 26

I would like to give Jadajuice (not sure if you wanted me to put your real name here) credit for coming up with the idea of Eric walking Pam down the aisle and then performing the ceremony. Thank you, this works a lot better than what I had originally thought of! I did get her permission to use this, so I am stealing from CH, not a fan fic fan.

This production is brought to you by the number 64 and the letter D Obsidian :D

******

I told Sookie that I had to pick up the robe and the ceremonial knife from the EE & E chapter in Shreveport and that I was taking Cameron along for the ride. My ulterior motive was to see my old buddy Quinn, who happens to be there at the moment. I thought that Quinn would like to meet Cameron, but I didn't tell that to Sookie.

I had arranged that EE & E cater a reception at Fangtasia for after John & Pam's 'wedding' and even broke out the Halloween decorations to make the place looked nice. After all, how often does your daughter get married? Of course, neither one of them knows about this yet nor that I invited most of area 5 to the ceremony.

I took Cameron out of the car seat and strapped him to my chest in his baby bjorn. Sookie laughs when I wear this, but I definitely wanted to make sure that Quinn couldn't miss Cameron.

The company was located in tasteful storefront building with their logo on the window. I guess that I looked more human with a baby strapped to me because their representative offered me a glass of champagne. I declined stating that I was a Vampire-American (you have to love our pc title) and requested to see Quinn. I was shown into his office.

He was still big, bald, buff and irritating. "Hi Babe," I said in a joking manner, which he seemed not to appreciate

"Eric would you like to take a seat?" he said, he noticed Cameron. "Whose baby is that?" he asked without preamble.

"This is my son, Cameron."

He seemed confused "I thought vampires couldn't father children."

"Well not normally, but you get a little magical help from a relative and look what happens. We even have another one on the way." I said and gave him my most innocent smile.

"Who is we?" he finally asked taking the bait.

"You remember my Bonded, Sookie Stackhouse? Well she is now Mrs. Northman and this is our first child. Would you like your email address to be added to the list for updates about how her pregnancy is progressing?" I asked in my sweetest tone of voice.

He sat down heavily "no that's okay. Congratulations" he didn't sound very sincere to me.

"Well, I have to go help my wife get ready for the wedding. The place is already decorated; Sookie and I did it last night and then ended up making love in a pile of tablecloths. It was funny; you had to have been there I guess. Your catering staff has my instructions in terms of set up. Nice to see you again" and with that I departed with a jaunty wave.

"Cameron, that was the buffoon that was meant to be your daddy. Now don't you like me better?" I asked while driving us home. The answer I received was "yap or yop" it was hard to tell.

Sookie was wearing a blue pastel satin sheath dress that Pam had selected for her, which was clearly not meant for an expecting mother. She looked according to her 'like a snake that swallowed a Volkswagen bug'. I assured her that she looked gorgeous and she told me I was mean.

"Quinn says hi, I ran into him at EE & E." I explained, she just gave me a sharp look and went back to applying her makeup.

I dressed in my favourite tuxedo; I was just going with traditional black and white just in case, I didn't know what colours they were wearing and didn't want to clash.

Sookie was curling her hair in the washroom." Eric, what is John's last name anyway? I know how closed mouthed you vamps are about these things and thought it impolite to ask."

"John Doe is his legal name. Though in his business dealings, he is known as Raven"

"As in the name of unidentified corpse? That is kind of funny, very vampire humoury. Why Raven?"

"He is Raven of Raven Records. He has a knack for finding unknown talented bands and signing them before they make it big."

"I have heard of that company! Isn't their slogan 'quoth the raven, come some more'? Oh, so he is that Raven" everything clicking into place.

Once we were both ready, we pronounced each other rape-able and waited for Pam to show up. "Honey, why is my son dressed like a rabbit?" I asked. She had him dressed in a blue sleeper, with a blue bow at the neck and a hood from which sprouted rabbit ears.

"I don't know, Pam bought him the outfit to match mine and wants me to carry him instead of a bouquet. I can understand the colour, but not sure about the ears." she explained with a shrug.

For reasons know only to themselves, Pam and John had decided to get married in an old barn. I hired a cleaning crew to give it a thorough going over and draped white tulle throughout and put down a white aisle runner with tea lights running along the edges. It looked a lot better and at least there was electricity.

Pam had rented an antique limo for the occasion and it came and picked us up. Our jaws both dropped at what she was wearing. (AN sorry not going to tell you until she is walking down the aisle, evil, evil Sid. Now should I stop the chapter here? hummm)

******

I had on a drapey 1930's gangster style black suit, black shirt and a green tie (Pam was picking my clothes for me again, sigh). I also have a lily boutonnière. She had suggested my wearing a fedora to, but I have too much hair to really pull off that look. So I just wore my hair down; I like my hair loose. I have no idea why I am dressed as a gangster, but Pam said I would understand when I saw her.

I was waiting in front of the white wrought iron arch at the end of the aisle runner. I like that it is plain white without it being covered with flowers. I was rather dubious when Eric insisted on decorating our sight but now am glad we agreed to it. It looks nice without being over the top.

I would love to know why there are almost one hundred vampires here, most of which I have never met, it was just supposed to be Eric and Sookie as guests and doing the ceremonial duties. So they are all staring at me or the guy in the catering uniform that is crawling up the aisle lighting the tea lights. I am glad that they have a covering as I would hate to lose Pam if her dress were to catch fire. Candles on the floor seemed like a dumb idea to me, vampires burn far too easily.

We had also opted for no aisle music (or aisle for that matter) so am naturally curious about the violin player, who seems to be tuning up to play the wedding march.

I am getting the feeling that even our vows might be altered. We had just taken the same sort of basic vows that Eric and Sookie said and took out the word husband and wife and made that commitment partner instead. Eric laughed when he saw what was crossed out.

As for the rings, we chose titanium half dome. We wanted something classic, but modern at the same time.

Through the barn door I could see the limousine pull up and Eric got out. He nodded towards the violin player and he started to play the wedding march. He helped Sookie out and she paused at the end of the aisle. She was wearing a dress that obviously was not meant for a baby bump but smiled anyway. She was holding Cameron and his outfit matched her dress colour wise, but seemed to be some sort of Halloween costume of a rabbit.

Eric walked around to the other side of the limo and opened the door. A slim hand reached for his and he helped her up. If I could breath, I would have caught it right there. Instead my fangs started to run out a little. I did notice that some of the male's present fangs ran out too and a few females as well.

Taking Eric's arm Pam started to glide towards me. She looked like an angel. She had on an ivory 1930's sheath silk satin dress, it was floor length with a train in back, sleeveless, tastefully low cut in front and completely form fitting. I was obvious that she wasn't wearing anything underneath. The train rippled like water behind her. Rather than a regular veil she had on a matching small ivory cocktail hat with chin length birdcage veil attached. Her hair was styled into loose curls and she had on bold red lipstick and carried a simple bouquet of white lilies.

Sookie took a position along side of us. When Pam reached the aisle Eric kissed her tenderly on the cheek, hugged her and guided her hand into mine. Someone ran up and gave him a robe which he donned. He stood before the arch, the lights from the candelabras on either side refllected on his blond hansomeness and made him look like a living god.

Pam looked up at me and for once I knew what she looked like when she was truly happy, I am sure that my expression was just as sappy.

He read the vows that he seemed to have memorized, all except the part about commitment partner. Our eyes both widened when he referred to us as husband and wife. Naturally because we were surrounded by people, neither of us could correct him. I could see a sadistic gleam in his eye and he looked directly into my eyes when he said husband. Pam seemed amused by this turn of events and I wondered idly if she was in on it. We exchanged rings first and then he took out the ceremonial knife and we put our wrists side by side so that he could slash across them quickly. He caught our mingled blood in the goblet and handed it for us to drink. I took a sip after Pam and watched her shudder slightly at my fae taste. Then he pronounced us husband and wife (I'm going to get you for this Eric) and we kissed. I could taste our mixed blood on her lips and it made me slightly dizzy. Everyone applauded. Pam gave me a secret smile and then people lined up to kiss her.

"Don't I get a kiss, Lover" said Eric who suddenly materialized at my side. I kissed him lightly on the lips.

"You are one sadist bastard" I commented.

"Coming from you that is a compliment"

"Is this your way of getting back at me for years of sexual harassment."

"No, I just wanted to make sure that Pam's day was perfect" he said with an oddly tender smile. "Shall we go to the reception now?"

"What reception? We didn't plan on having one."

He smirked at me in his devilishly handsome way and said, "you are now."

He had the limo driver drive us to Fangtasia; I eyed the door, which bore a sign that read 'Closed for Pam and John's wedding'. "Nice touch" I said drily.

Inside it was well decorated for once with white tablecloths and flowered centerpieces on each table.

"No coffins with stakes this time?" said Sookie to Eric. I didn't get it.

Of course there had to be a head table, naturally we couldn't just sit at a normal table and _not _be on display. "Are you able to shield with this many vamps around?" asked Pam in a slightly worried tone of voice.

"I should be okay, provided that we don't stay to the very end."

She quirked her eyebrow at me, surprisingly Eric like and said "as if I would let you."

All the vampires seemed aware of the glass clinking game and did it a lot, really, really a lot to the point where even our vampire lips started to hurt.

We even had a first dance that neither one of us had planned for "Beauty and the Beast" by Celine Dion. Guess who picked that one? I'll give you a hint: he is large, blond and used to be a Viking.

It was a really good time, but close to closing Pam announced "she had to get me alone".

Good, I wasn't sure if I could shield for much longer, some vampires were starting to nose around me a bit as if trying to place a certain odour.

We dropped Eric off (Sookie had left in a cab long before to take Cameron home). "Here" he said and handed me an envelop.

I opened it to find an all expense paid trip to a Supe resort in Hawaii for two weeks for Pam and I.

"I believe those were the terms of the agreement for you to help right?" and with another kiss on Pam's cheek he was gone.

I turned to Pam to tell her how beautiful she looked for about the hundredth time and then her lips were on mine.

We were barely in the door before she was clawing at my suit. However I carefully removed her dress wanting to see her in it again. Sure enough, not a stitch underneath. Eric had warned me that there was something about women hearing the words wife and I do that makes them completely wanton. This proved to be the case. Pam made me make love to her about six times before she seemed satisfied and I happily went along for the ride.

After we spooned up for day sleep with my left arm draped around her, my left hand resting on hers and our wedding rings just pressed together. For the first time in my undead life, I felt complete.


	27. Chapter 27

The bunny costume was just me thinking that because Pam is a vampire she wouldn't know what is flattering on a pregnant woman and would have just chosen a baby outfit for the colour to match the dress and not realized that it was meant as a Halloween costume.

Does someone want to come clean my microwave for me? I hate cleaning them. Obsidian.

******

The hearse for Air Anubis was arriving soon and we were putting everything that we were taking with us in the driveway.

Pam and John had showed up to help, but if anything, they were getting in our way. They kept on acting all lovey dovey, at one point John grabbed her from behind and nuzzled her neck (I am very familiar with this particular move of his) and Pam giggled. "Did Pam just giggle?' Sookie asked in a mystified tone of voice. I nodded affirmatively.

They wore matching t-shirts that read, 'I'm married, stake me'. Pam's was a baby tee and John's seemed to be a size too small, the fabric was straining against his muscular upper body. I asked Pam if John was the one that got them and she said that indeed he did. They also wore tight black jeans with their shirts.

Apparently it takes two full-grown vampires to carry a ten-pound travel cot and even then it didn't make it all the way out the door. I found the two of them leaning against the wall kissing furiously, while the travel bag lay beside them. I gave them a dirty look and snagged it with my finger, to take with the suitcases that I was already carrying. They didn't even notice. I asked Sookie why they are acting this way and she explained that they are at the gooey stage. I asked if we acted like that ourselves and she surprised me by saying "of course."

I had to retire my old beloved wooden coffin after Rhodes and got a custom made titanium one that is not even on the market yet. Sookie made me do it, after Pam's opened fall on impact after sliding down the hotel she said I needed something safer. I pointed out that coffins are not meant to be used as sleds anyway. She seems to think that I am made of glass and every conversation about my personal safety seems to start with "But you're a father now." I have lasted over one thousand years and will probably last one thousand more at least.

Getting back to the coffin, Sookie learned from some other vampire that he had one and they were the most secure ones on the planet, so she insisted on us making an appointment with the designer. I thought it looked like a bullet and despised it on sight. However I did have to admit that it was comfortably padded and had tight security locks on the inside only. The guy told me to use the demo model however I wanted. I don't think he realized that he shouldn't have said that when I flew it fifty feet into the air and dropped it. He looked very startled when it came crashing back to earth. I checked it for damage and found only a slight scratch on it. "We'll take it" I said satisfied.

Now both John and Pam have one too, but of course his he had air brushed with the same happy face with vampire teeth as his leather jacket. He had bought the one for Pam remembering about the Rhodes incident too and had it airbrushed 'I'm with Stupid', so Pam was reluctant to use it.

Sookie the butt fetishist kept on looking at John's rear when he bent over until I asked her to stop it. John said that he didn't mind, he had a nice ass and she was welcomed to look at it as much as she wanted. Besides, his hair was cut short to show it off.

"Waist length is hardly short"

"Fairy don't cut their hair, it should be down to my feet, but my ex said he didn't like my butt covered, so he persuaded me to cut it." John had picked up the habit of not mentioning Niall's name. Not because I believe that he thought it would upset Pam but that he just wanted to deny his existence.

We managed to pry Pam and John apart without the aid of a bucket of cold water when the hearse arrived. They ended up loading everything while I showed off my coffin to the driver, who seemed very curious about it. At the end of the demonstration, I felt that I had been too enthusiastic about it because he asked if I sell them. I assured him that I didn't and we were on the way.

The flight itself was uneventful but it appears that Cameron had learned how to flirt somewhere along the line and showed this to good advantage with the flight attendant. "Wonder where he learned that?" Sookie said in a sarcastic voice.

Sookie had managed to find a vampire friendly room in a hotel with a kitchenette. They had offered to provide a child cot, but we opted to buy our own for sanitary purposes. It was red and folded into a kind of baby tent with 4 spider legs. The salesman told us that it was great for a day at the beach too. I told him that I didn't think I could be there for that, but thank you. The entire thing folded into something like a tot bag and was really lightweight.

When we got to the hotel, we set that up and went to change for our interview. I pulled down the bedspread and frowned at the cheap linen. Sookie claims I have a linen fetish, I buy only the best, 1500 thread count Egyptian cotton. She said that due to my age there must have been times that I slept in the ground or had burlap bedding. I countered that yes indeed, there had been those times and that is why I appreciate fine linen. She called me a Princess, whatever that means.

I dressed in a olive suit and Sookie a purple maternity top and long black skirt, we had anticipated that we might have to show Felipe her belly and she didn't want to have to expose herself unnecessarily. I strapped Cameron into his baby bjorn and we took a cab there.

Sandy met us in the lobby and her eyes grew wide at the sight of Cameron with his features reflecting my own and Sookie's pregnant condition. She was too much of a bureaucrat to ask questions though. She just briefed us on protocol and then took us into the King's audience chamber.

Felipe de Castro was sitting on a throne, I swear to god it is true, an honest to goodness throne. I bowed before him while Sookie did one of her deep nods. He greeted us and seemed just as startled as Sandy had been. However, he was not afraid to ask questions.

"Eric who's child is this and is your wife not expecting?" The normally unflappable King seemed, well flapped.

"Yes, Your Majesty, this is our son Cameron and my spouse is four months gone with child." He ordered Sookie to approach and respectfully asked her to lift her shirt. She did and he briefly put his hand on her swollen belly and then said she could replace it.

"Have you proof that the child is yours?"

"You mean besides the fact that he looks like mini me, yes" I handed him his birth certificate, DNA test and my sperm test."

"These appear to be real" he commented.

"And we would be willing to submit to further testing if his Majesty would like to use his own doctor. The results would be the same"

"How is this even possible?" he asked getting to the bottom of the barrel.

I explained about Sookie' s unusual heritage and how Niall altered me (a little too well). When I got to the part about Niall influencing the King by use of fae magic to send me to guard a field of wheat, Felipe's face went ridged with anger. "Where is this fairy? He must be brought before me to be held accountable for his actions."

"He is no longer amongst the living, his ex-lover, the vampire-fairy John Doe turned him into a vampire and Niall asked us to stake him rather then remain undead."

"John? John as in Raven is in Shreveport?" asked the King in an excited tone.

I was curious by how happy he seemed at hearing John's name, so answered "Yes, he recently married my child, Pam. The beautiful blond, I think you might remember her."

Felipe's face fell at this information "have they pledged fidelity to each other?"

I was still confused why he seemed so interested "They are still working on that I believe, the last thing on the table was that neither is permitted to date a member of the opposite sex. Felipe's face lit up when I said this, like a girl's who had the most popular boy in school ask her on a date.

"Do you think you could ask him to call me?" he said in a wistful tone of voice. Then it dawned on me, John was not exaggerating his universal appeal. I shared looks of surprise with Sookie.

"Um, can we get back to the matter at hand.?" I suggested

"Of course, of course" said Felipe in his normal voice. "Why did you keep this information from me?"

"We have been concerned about the safety of our family to really discuss with that many people."

He nodded "I can understand that." He looked at Sookie "are you still able to provide me with your talent while like this?" he said indicating her belly.

In a humble tone she answered "my husband has sworn fealty to you and so have I; I shall offer you my services as you need but won't be able to travel sometimes when I am too close to term. Airlines won't allow it. Perhaps I could drive while Eric flies?" she suggested.

Felipe looked at me, his look spoke volumes "A young attractive pregnant female driving across the county alone. I don't think that is a good idea."

"I told her that, as if I would allow it." I said with a shake of my head.

"How many children are you planning to have?"

I said, "this is the last one" at the same time that Sookie said "four'. My eyes got wild with shock at this idea.

"Perhaps we can just schedule events around the times when you can travel then." He said in a reasonable tone.

"His Majesty is most kind," I said.

"When the children are older we intent to employ a full time nanny so that it will make it easier for all concerned. That way they can just stay home' Sookie said.

"While at the ball, we shall introduce your family to those who owe me fealty and I shall tell all that your wife and family are under my protection."

"Might I ask why you are being so helpful, you Most Gracious Majesty?" I was very curious.

He laughed "when I was a human male I had ten children, if anyone knows about how awkward it is traveling with young children; it is me. Besides, I like children and think that this is an interesting turn of event. Might I be allowed to send your children gifts?"

"Of course Your Majesty, please just make them age appropriate….and nothing with panda bears please."

"Fair enough, you may return to your hotel. And don't forget to ask John to phone me" he finished in a hopeful tone of voice.


	28. Chapter 28

Funny thing happened yesterday, my husband likes to dye his hair a purpley reddish colour and the dye company put the wrong ye in the wrong package, so he mixed a dark brown with a purple-mahogany colour. It turned out way too brown and he kept saying he couldn't go to work the next day with 'stupid hair'. My husband is really, really vain about his long hair. It was so funny. He is worst then most girls I know when it comes fussing with it. Such a Princess! Obsidian

******

Pam is sitting in a chair while I kneel on the floor in front of her orally pleasuring her. She has on only her leather jacket and a pair of motorcycle boots. She holds a riding crop in her hand and she keeps on hitting me with it when I fail to bring her to orgasm. Feeling in a playful mood I keep on stopping just as she is approaching it and she keeps getting frustrated. She is not amused

Finally, I got serious about it and she threw back her head and growled. I leaned up and kissed her "You are even sweeter then you look" I teased. "It is too bad that you have to go into Fangtasia or I wouldn't let you out of bed all night."

She gave me a lazy contented smiled and said "yes, but someone has to run the place."

"That is why I keep on telling you that you should hire a manager. Eric is not going to be around so much when the new baby is born and you are going to be coming to Florida a lot to visit me."

"Am I? I was only there the one time after Rhodes" she teased back.

"Don't remind me of that time." The summit bombing was the 9 11 of the vampire world. I like most of my kind; I couldn't reach my friends and colleagues for hours. I finally got into my company jet and flew there to the temporary shelter that the survivors were housed in. I rushed into place hoping beyond hope that Pam and Eric were still alive, only to be blocked at the door by some human who insisted that only family members were allowed in.

I stood there arguing with her that most vampire's families are long dead and vamp-human marriage was not that popular yet. Until Eric roused himself long enough to recognize my voice and told me to shut the fuck up and come in. It was there that I discovered that they were partially burned but still alive. I dropped Eric off in Shreveport on his insistence and took Pam home with me for a few days so I could take care of her.

"Don't be so silly, I am harder to get rid of then that" she said and held a black leather corset up to herself for me to lace.

"I don't know why you wear these, you hate them and they can't be that comfortable." I commented as I laced.

She sighed, "The thralls expect a certain look from a vampire, so we have to sell the image. Not every one of us can get away with looking like an extra for Cirque de Soleil." She was referring to my love of colourful clothing.

Once she was ready she came to join me in the living room where I was working on my lap top "are you coming in with me tonight?" she asked.

"I have to answer some business email, it is kind of piling up; someone is keeping me busy" I said pulling her onto my lap. I kissed her deeply. "I'll drop by later, Eric texted me that he has some sort of message to give me."

"Keep on kissing me like that and neither of us is going in" she said with a smile in her voice and gave me a final kiss before departing.

*****

I could feel Sookie pulsating around me and adjusted myself slightly so that each time I thrust into her it would rub hard against her g-spot. Her moans were so deep they almost sounded like she was in agony. She had told me that we are going to have to consider different positions as her pregnancy progresses, but for now I prefer me on top and Beanie brushing against me.

My own completion is so close that I can practically taste it, but I hold myself back to see if I can manage to bring her to orgasm for the eighth time tonight. I felt her go and allowed myself to be drawn into hers. I collapse gently on top of her. "Umm, are you sure that you have to go into tonight?" she said once the power of speech returned to her.

"I promised Pam that I would be there" I explained. "I have been taking a lot of time off and can't leave her in charge all the time."

I went to take a quick shower, but she stopped me. "Oh no you don't; I want everyone to smell me on you and know what you have been up to."

"Okay and here I thought that Pam was kinky one." I asked her to help me chose an outfit and she complained that it was all black, so what was the difference. We finally selected tight black jeans, a muscle shirt and a leather vest.

"Do I look good?" I asked posing for her.

"You look a lot sexier then a married man ought to" she said in a reproachful tone of voice, but with a teasing smile to let me know she was joking.

"Well, wife, you will just have to keep the bed warm for me for when I return. Now wasn't it better to make love on our designer sheets as opposed to the scratchy things from last night in the hotel?"

"Sheet fetishist!" she cried. "By the way Honey, I was thinking that perhaps we should hire that babysitter from before to come with us to Nevada. We will need someone to watch him while we are at the ball and she seemed competent."

I mulled that over "that is a good idea; I'll call her right now."

I pulled out her card and dialed the number on it.

"Allison Crowley, babysitter to the Supes" she answered.

I explained who I was and asked her the question I thought I needed an answer to before booking her. "Ms. Crowley, you are not a fang-banger by any chance are you?"

She paused for a second and then answered "no offence intended Mr. Northman, but don't flatter yourself."

Realizing what she thought I was asking, I hastily said "No, that is not what I meant; we are going to a vampire event and want to know that you will watching our son rather then offering yourself to vamps."

"Nah, vamps aren't my thing. Care to explain what I would be doing there?"

I explained that she would be an on-call babysitter and could enjoy her time when she was free however she wanted.

"So what you are saying is that I get an all expense paid trip to Las Vegas and get compensated for my time? Count me in. When do we leave?"

I explained about the travel times and details. Then I left for Fangtasia.

Pam was already at the door "Good evening Master, smells like you were having fun."

"Right back at you" I said noticing the faint odour of sexual stimulation coming from her.

She laughed and we opened for business for the night.

A couple hours later John came in to join Pam, who stropped herself to him. I swear those two are trying to devour each other. Of course he came to kiss me too "Hi Lover, you had a message for me", he said patting my ass. I just brushed his hand off me like it was an annoying fly.

******

Eric removed my hand from his buttocks and then said "Felipe de Castro was most insistent that I give you the message for you to call him."

I could feel the look of distaste on my features. "Oh that idiot, where did you run into him?"

******

"He is the new King, don't you read any of the news letters that I send you?" I said in an incredulous tone of voice.

"I get so many from you that I only skim through a couple once in a while. He is actually your King? Wow. I personally am not a fan."

"Why not?" I asked now curious.

"I had sex with him at an orgy once, just out of curiosity and he started to stalk me. Can you imagine being constantly pursued by someone that you are not interested in?"

"Wow, I can't imagine." I think that he actually managed to miss the ironic tone in my voice.


	29. Chapter 29

Don't you all start crying on me now; things always work out happy in my stories.

Warning: if you see the Beatles Musical Across the Universe, you will never get the music out of your head. The movie is great and I love the Beatles, but it would be nice to have something else stuck in my head for a change.

Gak, I have to go back to work. Bossholes that actually expect to work when you would rather update. Honestly. Obsidian

Karen-You are so froody you probably know where your towel is at ;)

******

We decided to opt for a 3D ultrasound rather then a normal grainy one and we stunned by the results. We could see every feature on her, yes her face. Sookie started crying when she heard that we were having a girl.

I didn't start crying but did feel a little teary; that this was even possible was overwhelming even to a vampire. I mean, I know that there is a tiny little person being formed inside my wife's belly, but to actually see her was just incredible. Especially seeing her shift position, open her eyes and to even see her facial expressions. I definitely have decided that I like modern technology after this doctor's visit.

I leaned down until I was eye level with Cameron. "You're having a little sister," I said to him as he lounged in his stroller. He seemed to be more interested in the zipper on my jacket then in this news.

My wife watched the baby move and suck her thumb, each move was in stop motion. "Beanie looks a little scary like that with her little blob of a nose and thin cheeks." She commented after she stopped crying.

The attendant just laughed and said "don't worry, she has 5 more months to cook and then soon she will look just as good as her brother. She assured us that our girl was developing at a normal rate and seemed strong and healthy. She then wanted to know if we wanted the video set to music. Both of us declined.

I helped Sookie clean the gel off her belly and helped her get herself and Cameron into the slow driving Ford I detest.

"Is childbirth as bad as they say it is? I asked curiously.

"Yes, it is the worst pain in the world. But the funny thing that I have heard is that you are always supposed to forget in between births what it is like. So each time when it beings, you feel like saying "Oh now I can remember, stop it, stop it." And of course by then it is nine months too late to stop it. Remember when you helped remove that stake from me in Jackson?" I answered in the affirmative. "That was little more like a tickle compared to childbirth."

I remembered how much she screamed during that night "yet you are having another and want two more?"

"Of course, I want to have tons of children with you besides if I have an epidural this time I should be fine. It is not like I intended to have another one right away, blame your strong swimmers, Mister." I couldn't resist giving her a manly grin. I like when she implies I am a stud. Good thing I am too, her sex drive is still crazy out of control. I surprised I am allowed to leave the house at all.

******

I was making love to Pam in her hot tube, there was water literally everywhere by now. On the walls, on the floor, on her windows and soaking her curtains. Making gentle love is not something we do very often. The TV was on in the next room and we were supposed to leave to go on honeymoon in a few days. Both of us were excited, we hadn't travelled together in a while and certainly never as a married couple.

I was just about to move her into the bedroom, as I was getting sick of being splashed when I heard the tail end of the news. "David Death of Chainsaw Sister was found in his hotel room this morning dead from a drug overdose."

Using my vampiric speed I ran into the living room and watched what could be potential threat to my business unfold. "What it is Honey?" asked Pam as she slipped my bathrobe around me.

I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I barely even acknowledged that this was the first time she called me by a term of endearment. However, I did catch it in time. "Pam, I know that you are going to hate me, but I have to go back to Florida. I represent Chainsaw Sister and we are going to have to do some major damage control on this."

"I understand" she said a strangled voice and turned from me.

I reached out and touched her shoulder and felt it heaving. Pam was crying! I had never seen her cry, I didn't even expect her capable of it. "Sweetheart" I said, turned her around and pulled her into my arms. I could feel her shuddering against me; I stroked her hair and waited until she was calm. To be honest I almost wanted to cry too.

"Pam I don't want to leave, especially not now."

"What about our honeymoon?" she asked in a hallow voice.

"We will change the date and go next month, I promise. Now don't be sad, I will be back before you know it"

"I don't want you to go." She said honestly. We just got married and now you have to leave"

"Nor do I" I said cuddling her close to me. "But I have to."

She hugged me back and kind of sniffled a bit. "See? I told you that I would make a lousy husband; married less then a week and already making you cry." I said trying to cheer her up a bit. She gave me a weak smile while I brushed a blood tear away with my thumb. "Perhaps it is good that I am leaving or maybe next week I would have started beating you."

"Nonsense, I am the one that beats you and you have to take it"

"With pleasure, honey" I said kissing her. "careful people will think that you like me" I teased

"I don't like you, I love you" she said sadly.

"I love you too"

"Do you have to leave right away?" she asked.

"I can wait until tomorrow, I want to say goodbye to Eric, Sookie and Cameron. Damned if that little tyke hasn't grown on me."

"Then we have tonight?" she asked.

"Yes, and we can do anything that you want" I said lifting up a pair of handcuffs that happened to be on her coffee table for emphasis.

She shook her head "could we just have Eric sex?" she requested.

Wordlessly I carried her into 'our' bedroom and whispering words of love and endearment to each other, we made the gentlest love we have ever had, as if the other one was made of spun glass and would shatter. After, we spooned up for day rest, my larger body curled around her slight one. Her sheets smelled of Gain laundry detergent, her hair Mane 'N Tail shampoo, her skin Ivory body wash.....and me. Which has always been my favourite scent to smell on her.


	30. Chapter 30

Going to post, then go back to work like a good girl.

You guys sick of this story yet? :) Obsidian

******

I was kind of embarrassed that I cried the night before, but I am trying not to show it. I am normally so strong emotionally, yet there I was acting like, what Sookie would term as being a Weeping Willa. I don't know why but him calling me Sweetheart and trying to comfort me only made me cry worse.

I guess I am have been too busy playing house with John, that the thought of him leaving even for a month is making me upset. Somewhere along the way I started to love him and missed him horribly when he wasn't around. His company is practically an addiction to me as a chocolate bar is to a chocoholic.

I don't know what it is about this irritatingly cuddly man that makes me act just as bad, if not worse than him. He is about as threatening as a teddy bear, I am far more intimidating and I know it. How can a seven foot vampire be non-threatening anyway? It is just plain sad, people and even young children smile at him when we are out walking together and he smiles back. Then they look at me and quickly glance away as if in fear. He pets dogs on the street and baby talks to them; dogs for gods sakes!

It is even hard to have proper SM sex with him when my favourite thing to do to him is to grab his hair and pull his heartbreakingly full lips against mine for a kiss. Don't even ask me how it feels to lightly bite his bottom lip until he moans a little in that cute way of his. Sigh.

I know that the commitment ceremony was my idea and it terrified the crap out of him at first. I know that he hadn't had a great track record when it comes to relationships; most of them fall for him and then he is the first one out and running. I know this because I was one of them. That is why I was too reluctant to tell him. I thought that he would understand when I asked for the ceremony, but he is just as doltish as most males it seems.

I always knew the he had a particular fondest for me and that he would agree to it, I just didn't know that he returned my feelings until _that night_. Guess who is doltish now?

Get a grip on yourself Pam, no embarrassing yourself anymore.

******

We are over at Eric and Sookie saying goodbye to them, I am concerned about Pam she has been to distant since we woke up. I would ask her, but suspect that if I make a big deal over the fact that she had an 'emotional moment' that she will probably break something over my head.

While they are showing Pam a video about what their new baby looks like I asked if I could go see Cameron. That blob thing is freaking me out! Guess I am not father material, shiver.

I walked silently into what I personally call Panda Bear Hell and found him awake. I was surprised when he smiled at me and raised his arms.

"Tsk tsk, flirting with me already Cameron. What would your father think?" I lifted him out of his crib and cradled him in the way that Pam had insisted I learn. I sat down in what I was told, was Sookie's grandmother's rocking chair and began idly rocking to and fro. Cameron pulled my hair several times but after how hard Pam normally pulls it, I barely even felt it. I found myself humming some tune to him and quickly stopped when I realized that it was "All My Loving" by the Beatles. (AN See? Really can't get them out of my head).

A sat there just rocking with him thinking over this past couple months, replaying in my mind favourite moments with what, no doubt, was probably a sappy look on my face. It had started out as normal, us going out to fetish club and dance bars socializing, flirting and sometimes picking up someone up to share or play with if there was anyone interesting to both that we liked.

Then our relationship changed after I had my little melt down and became more intimate, we grew closer. We almost stopped going out all together and only ever came home by ourselves. Then there was only us, staying in. Of all that went on, it was the togetherness stage that I preferred. I never get bored of her company no matter what we do.

I was still rocking and apparently must have resumed with my song, only I was singing it out loud by this point because when Sookie joined me, she sang "And send all my loving to you" along with me. Feeling kind of stupid, I apologized for taking Cameron out of his crib without her or Eric's permission.

"It is not like you are hurting him; he likes to be rocked and sang to. He goes nuts when Eric sings "Pour Some Sugar on Me" to him." she said.

I laughed out loud at the image of Eric singing _anything _to a baby, let alone a Def Leppard song. "Do you think that you could video tape the next time he does that? I know several people that would pay to see that."

"Sure, we can sell them in the Fangtasia gift shop" she said with a grin. "Pam isn't taking that you're leaving very well, huh?"

"Are you reading my mind?" I asked recalling that she was a telepath.

"I can't read vampire minds" she explained. "However I do know some people or vampires in this case, well enough to notice that you two are being infallibly polite tonight and not plastered against each other as usual."

"I guess we have been a little sappy lately" I said neutrally.

"Just a little. I have never seen Pam like this."

"Me neither" I admitted, I liked Sookie since I met her; she is a genuinely caring person and has a nice sense of humour.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"There is nothing to say really. She lives here and I live in Florida. Just could you keep an eye on her for me? I know it sounds strange seeing that this is Pam and all, but she is kind of upset up my leaving, the timing stinks."

"She is my friend and Eric's child; of course we will keep an eye on her. You never get to choose who you love, huh? It seems to be all fate and pheromones" she said.

"Or cupid on a bender" I answered. "Wonder what would happened if he got us two couples mixed up between tequila shots?" I said just out of curiosity.

"I wouldn't have fought it too hard" she said confirming my suspicion. Of course I was attracted to her, but more like a passing fancy for a pretty girl. I certainly would never think to act on it, I may have the morals of an alley cat, but I certainly would never mess with a friend's wife. It was kind of an ego boost to know that she was attracted to me too though.

"Well, there is always your next life time" I joked.

"Sounds good, I'll be the Asian girl at the bar in a red dress" she joked back.

"I'll be sure to look for you. I have to go, thank you for everything." I kissed Cameron goodbye surprised at the how silky a baby's skin is and hugged Sookie goodbye.

"I appreciate you singing to my son, but perhaps you are singing that song to the wrong person" she finished cryptically

I went to see Eric in his office. "I just came to say goodbye, Lover. Will you miss me?" and leaned over and kissed him on the lips.

He leaned back in his chair "you are going to be back soon?"

"Why sheriff, are you kicking me out of area 5?"

"Nope, just making sure that you remember that you owe my child a honeymoon. I would hate have to stake you because you reneged on your promises, pretty boy" he said sweetly.

We said our final goodbyes and then Pam drove me back to her house so we could finish packing for the journey. There wasn't a whole lot to pack; I normally keep a spare wardrobe in an empty closet that Pam is generous enough to let me use.

She had been stiffly polite all night and it was driving me mental. I know that this was her way of trying not to show that she was upset. She was focusing on the practical, first she helped me pack and attach that which I was taking with me to my Harley. Then she insisted on braiding my hair so that the wind wouldn't turn it into, according to her 'a giant tumbleweed that takes two days to comb through'. Gone was the intimacy from even the night before.

So I did the only thing that I could think of to jar her out of her aloofness. I know that she was expecting me to try and approach her with soft caresses as I normally do and she would reject them. So I decided to think like Pam and smacked her hard on the ass. She yelped and rubbed it. "What the hell was that for?"

I answered her by doing one of her favourite moves and pulled her hair back and kissed her. She thrashed against me for a few moments and then sagged. When I tilted my head back to look at her, she shoved me away. "I AM NOT GOING TO FUCKING MISS YOU!" she screamed.

"Yes you will and I will miss you." I said calmly.

"Why should I miss a pointy eared freak like you?" she sneered.

"Because I am your pointy eared freak" I countered. Then added "don't like my ears?" I can't help having self esteem issues. You try being the girly looking younger brother of 'god's gift to women, super butch Thor' and see if you don't suffer a few hundred million ego bruises too.

"Why? You get to go back to our own life with all your little girlfriends and boyfriends and you won't even have to think about the fake vows you made to a stupid idiot. You can even make them laugh with stories about it."

"You obviously haven't read what I engraved in your ring. Read it"

She slipped it off and held it to the light "Only You" she said in a shocked tone of voice. "I thought that we agreed that we could still date our own sex. Is this some sort of a joke?"

"No, it isn't a joke and you can date all the girls that you want, but I am through with dating. I can't take the proposals anymore."

"What proposals?" she seemed confused.

"Ever since the stupid vamp-human marriage bill passed it seems like every single girl I buy a drink for, take on a date or even accidently bump into keeps saying "do you know that humans and vampires can legally marry now?" . I keep looking around to see if I am the last man on earth, but there seems to be plenty of them left. Why to you think I kept flinching every time someone referred to our ceremony as a wedding? I got so sick of the inquires; I started pretending that I am already married"

"The why did you say yes to our commitment ceremony if that is the case?"

"The wife that I described when pretending, was a beautiful blond vampire named Pam; you. So when you actually asked me to marry you it seemed like, well fate" remembering my discussion with Sookie earlier.

"So you aren't dating because you have a little wifey now? How convenient" she said drolly.

"No, I am not dating because I am committed to the woman I love, I committed to you the minute you told me that you loved me too." I pretended not to notice when she serendipitously brushed away a tear. She can't handle emotions well I knew she wouldn't appreciate any comments I made.

"I'll miss you" she said simply and put her arms around me for a fully body hug

"I'll miss you too" She walked me out to my Harley and we shared one last deep kiss. I put on my helmet and drove away. I watched her in the rear view mirror until she disappeared from view. She watched me leave as well. It was only a short drive to the airport where I would board my company jet and be home in a few hours.

I knew that I would see her again soon, but could not prevent a few tears from rolling down my cheeks inside my helmet; these are the first ones that I have shed since Niall's final death. I felt rather melancholy because even the idea that I was going to be somewhere in the world where I wasn't going to wake up beside her was too much.

I am horribly, completely, ruinously, ridiculously smitten with Pam, my wife.


	31. Chapter 31

I couldn't resist doing a nonsense chapter about Eric trying to help Sookie shop for clothes for Las Vegas. It is just a wee bit of fluff and has little to do with the plot. I like to believe that each chapter should tell a story onto itself, or it is lazy and not doing its job and I shall have to fire it.

Warning: This chapter contains no Pam and John, to vote for less or more Pam and John pm me or throw it in your review if you would like to, Obsidian

Yes, I would like to buy the letter Z

******

"It doesn't matter what I wear; I'm going to look like a beached whale anyway" Sookie argued. "What is with you vampires and your need to have a ball at every event anyway?"

Sookie and I had been trying to buy her a dress for the ball for over an hour with limited success. All of my suggestions make her look whale-like (according to her) and all of hers are too causal for the occasion.

"Vampires are big on formal events", I explained through gritted teeth. I am not the best shopping companion for a woman, but Pam is busy tonight and we have to leave tomorrow. I am completely bored, even Cameron in his stroller looks bored.

"How about this one?" I asked holding out what seemed the fiftieth dress of the evening. "It is a nice burgundy colour, has an empire waist and comes with a matching scarf."

"I am not too crazy about the silver band at the top of the waist. It will make me look even larger then I am" she explained.

"Sookie, you are supposed to look like you are pregnant because _you are_. The Felipe is going to announce that Cameron, Beanie and yourself are under his protection, therefore the more obvious your pregnancy, the better."

"Why don't I just wear one of my sheer baby doll lingerie tops then? Wonderful, while you get to look great in your tux, I get to waddle along beside you in a burgundy tarpaulin."

"You look beautiful; I think you have never looked better in your life." I said in exasperation.

"So I look better chubby?" she asked in a dangerous voice. I knew better than to go there by now.

"You are not chubby" I touched her belly, "this is where Beanie lives for now and it is beautiful." See? I can be a silver tongued devil when I try.

She got a dreamy look on her face when I said that and so did the sales assistant who until now was looking way too amused by our exchange. "Eric that is so sweet. You really think so?"

"Of course, I am thrilled that I get to be here to witness your pregnancy this time."

"I was kind of worried that you would find me gross"

"Of course not, I think you look radiant." We ended up getting the burgundy dress because it was "the least ugly of them all".

"Now what?" I inquired

"Shoes and lingerie to go with the dress" she replied. I inwardly groaned.

"You have several pairs of black flats at home. Why not just wear a pair of those?" I think I said the wrong thing because the sales assistant and Sookie exchanged glances. "I am not trying to be cheap" I said annoyed. "I thought that black went with everything"

"It does, but it is better if I get a sort with more padding in them if we are going to be dancing a lot."

"Oh" I said feeling like a fish out of water. I turned to the assistant "Do you sell shoes here?" she nodded "and lingerie?" again she nodded. "Well take us there then."

First we found the shoes, silver sandals that matched the belt on her dress. Then we were off to the lingerie section, where I earned many nasty stares from other women. "Sookie, I don't think I am welcome in this section" I whispered to her.

"Oh no, you are not leaving, you said you wanted to help me, so help me. Now what do you think will go with my dress? Do you think that I pick the sexy little enticements that I wear for you at home off my lingerie bush?"

Knowing her sizes already I picked burgundy lingerie at random knowing how she likes to wear the same colours underneath that she wears on the surface and presented them to her.

"Honey, a push up bra is not good for breasts my size, I will look like a hooker."

I turned to the sales assistant and said "please help my wife find lingerie that is good for her pregnant state and goes with her dress" I said with as much patience as possible. Then I rattled off Sookie's sizes to help her.

"Eric! You don't talk about a woman's size in public" she admonished and shared another glance with the assistant. As if to say "Sorry my husband is so stupid today"

"Fine" I said and sat down in a chair beside Cameron's stroller and waited while she chose her lingerie for the trip. Whenever she asked my opinion of a certain article I just said "yeah, looks good"

Finally the dress buying nightmare was over, but apparently we had to go buy her some suits and other things for the trip. I promised to perform all the sexual favours she could conceive of that evening, if I could just wait in the food court for her. She agreed, providing I watch Cameron. This I agreed to as well.

So I sat at the orange plastic table with the seat attached drinking one of the true bloods that I bought earlier and saying "thank you" automatically to the fifteen million women strolling by who keep on saying "cute baby" to me.

By the time Sookie came to find me, I am more then happy to get out of Shopping Mall Hell. In the time that I sat there I had been questioned by a rent a cop about my lurking in the food court, been giggled at by teenaged girls, had some weird homeless guy steal my empty true blood bottle for the deposit and had someone else's baby spill ice cream on my new black suede jacket. Not to mention being hit on by some crazy guy in a pink tube top and wearing a pair of beige pantyhoses on his head.

I carried her purchases to the car, got Cameron's stroller folded, stowed and him in his car seat in record time. I was so happy to be out of that place and heading for home.

"Did you get everything that you needed?" I asked while driving us home.

"Actually, they had to order my pants as they were out of the size that I need and we have to pick them up tomorrow before we leave. Honey, why are you making that groaning sound?"


	32. Chapter 32

Gotta go watch a parade in which Jesus is being fake whipped by fake gladiators down the streets in downtown Toronto. It is called the Passion Parade and is a catholic parade. However, we just go to see it for the entertainment value and then drink our faces off. Yes, I am evil.

Thank you for the nice reviews for Happily Ever After. I was not sure that anyone would be interested in a series in which one of the characters doesn't even appear in the book. He will appear in this series upon occasion too. I think I have a crush on him; what can I say I have a thing for tall brunettes. Obsidian

******

We went back to the mall on the way to the airport and I was gracious enough to offer to watch Cameron in the car while she went inside to pick up her pants.

I was still a little miffed at her from the night before. She had chosen her sexual favours and they were not what I was expecting. The first one was vacuuming the upper floor, and then dusting all the upper shelves and the tops of bookshelves and tops of kitchen cabinets that Midget Wife couldn't reach. Just for good measure she said I might as well do the light fixtures too seeing how I could fly. I sarcastically suggested that I wash the ceilings while at it and she brightened and said "good idea". When I pointed out that none of what she asked me to do was considered a sexual favour. She said think of it as porn for women. So I did them and then called an agency to hire a maid. Screw this nonsense.

After inspecting my endeavors as closely as any drill sergeant, Sookie allowed me to have sex with her. She wanted it fairly rough, but I refused. When she asked why, I retorted that I would rather not take the risk of taking our daughter's virginity while having sex with my wife. So she laughed and allowed me to make gentle love to her.

We picked up Allison who I had managed to persuade to dress down a bit after taking her to Fangtasia to see that vampire groupie's dressed the same as her and what she would be mistaken for in Vegas while the whole town was overrun by hungry vampires. Suddenly she added blue jeans and patterned knit tops to her all black wardrobe. "What if I meet someone that I like on this trip?" she asked.

"You can see them on your own time and you may take them to your room if you wish, but not when Cameron is present, my son is not to be exposed to people having sex, it is a rule that we have in our house. And no swear words. " I was rather surprised when she accused me of being an old fashioned fuddy duddy. Old fashioned? Me? I practically invented causal sex.

When the hearse arrived, we got everything loaded up in record time. There were no vampires plastered to each other getting in our way this time. Allison loved riding in the hearse and insisted that she try out my coffin. I watched in amusement as she settled into crossed her arms and pretended to be dead. "Is this the way that you sleep?" she asked. I explained that I don't sleep exactly like the dead but just stay in whatever position I happen to lie down in.

Sookie surprised me by suggesting that I wear part of what she termed my shrink-wrap wardrobe. I asked why.

"You will be the only vampire checking into a vampire hotel with a pregnant wife, a baby and a nanny. You will need to look as macho as possible. I pointed out that all of the above does make me look macho indeed. Complying with her wishes I put on the black jeans that I actually have to lie down on the bed to do up and a black turtleneck that makes my pecs practically leap out at people. Then she just wanted to take me back to bed.

The arm candy on the plane seemed to appreciate my look and Sookie didn't seem to appreciate her staring at me. "Sorry, this vampire is off limits" she said pointing to my wedding ring.

I slunk low in my seat feeling like I have 'tame vamp" tattooed on my forehead.

"How come Pam isn't coming to the ball? Wasn't she invited?"

"She was but just wasn't in the mood to go, she found out that HE is going to be appearing on a new reality TV show" we exchanged a significant look. We had gotten into the habit of not saying John's name around Pam.

"What sort of show?" she asked.

"You have heard of The Bachelor?" she nodded "well, same concept with 25 beautiful available women, but in this case it is The Vampire Bachelor."

"What? He is not, poor Pam having to watch some hoes trying to seduce her husband."

"It is probably just a publicity stunt dreamed up by his public relations department. I am sure he would never dare cheat on Pam; she is scary when she is mad. She would probably remove is balls and he would have to slowly and painfully regenerate them." I shivered at that idea. "Still, that would be a good way to promote Fangtasia" I mused and then wished I hadn't said that out loud.'

"It would certainly be a great promotion when I show up with an axe to hack the girls off you and then stake you" replied Sookie.

We arrived at the airport and security us pulled aside so that they could search Cameron and his belongings for drugs. "Don't worry he swallowed the condom full of crack earlier" I said sourly as they searched the formerly sterilized nipples for his bottles. The security guard just glared at me.

When we got into the hotel we were surprised to find a giant teddy bear and note that read:

Welcome to Nevada, Cameron.

Love,

Uncle Felipe

After reading the note Sookie said, "another Uncle? So far Cameron has Uncle Sam, Uncle Jason and Uncle John. He is going to be confused later on in life who he is actually related to"

"I think that it is great that he is taking an interest in our son."

"Yes, I imagine that it is good for you politically," answered Sookie dryly.

Allison stopped by the room and helped us set up the travel cot. I noticed that she had on a leather bustier and spandex hot pants over fishnets that made a vain attempt of covering her butt. She asked if we needed anything. We indicated that we didn't and asked her plans for the evening. She told us that she and the girl from the plane were going to get a drink at a bar.

"No vampires" I cautioned her.

She indicated to Cameron. "You are his father, not mine. Besides, I like shifters; vampires just leave me cold" and left laughing at her own joke.

"You think we should introduce her to Sam? He might be able to teach her how to wear clothes." I said to Sookie.

"Eric, the girls that you used to so-call date wore about the same amount of clothes, you really are becoming a fuddy duddy."

I fumed a bit at being called that then took her to dinner after, we stopped in a piano bar for some entertainment. Neither of us sang along but Cameron seemed to be trying.

"Our son likes show tunes, I wonder what that is supposed to mean?" I mused.

We stayed until she got tired and I took them back to the hotel room and went to visit Felipe.


	33. Chapter 33

Hee hee, not to much time to get this out, so I kind of jumbled this together as well as I could. Not up to my usual standards, but I hope you will forgive me. Obsidian.

******

The meeting with Felipe went well but when I got back to our room it was still kind of early so I decided to go for a swim in the pool, naturally Cameron woke up so first I fed him and changed him. He seemed unwilling to go back to sleep, so I put on his swimsuit and decided to take him with me. Sookie woke and decided to join us. My fangs ran out when she decided to wear the red bikini that I bought her. She may think she looks heavy but all she has is slightly larger breasts and her Beanie Bump.

We arrived at the pool to discover it full of vampires, but that is not a surprise, it is a vampire hotel and who else is normally up this late at night. They seemed confused by the presence of a baby in their midst. So we were getting some looks to say the least. Sookie's uncovered belly was being checked out more then once as well.

Finding the pool was heated, I made a point of taking Cameron in the water with me and he squealed as he does when he is he having fun and thrashed his arms. I swirled him around him my arms, keeping his head above water. All of our movements were closely monitored by the other vampires. "Can I help you?" I asked them finally

The female in their group approached me; she had that quiet quality of leadership that I identified immediately. "I am Carol, my colleagues and I didn't mean to be rude, we were just naturally curious about your…unique nest"

I introduced them to Sookie, Cameron and myself and for good measure included Beanie in the introduction.

"Beanie?" asked Carol confused, "that seems to be an odd name for a girl."

"It is not going to be her permanent name, if is just her womb name" she seemed even more confused by this. So I asked Sookie to explain and then Carol understood. I think that this was what people term as a girl thing.

So they started wanting to play with Cameron too and started spraying water on his belly with a squirt toy we had brought to amuse him, he loved it. Finally Sookie grew nervous that their gentle play might turn too rough and insisted that they both go back to bed.

The next night we had an appointment with Felipe before the ball as he indicated to me that there was something that he wanted to tell both Sookie and in confidence. So we both got ready, myself in my tux my hair worn loose and shiny, as she likes it and her in what she had taken to calling her burgundy tarpaulin. We dropped Cameron off in Allison's room, she was only half dressed and the room smelled of shifter. I gave her a sharp look and she looked sheepish. "He is long gone and not returning tonight." she explained.

"Good, get dress" I commanded.

We moved the cot into her room and left hand in hand to go see Felipe in his penthouse suite.

"Your Majesty" I said bowing when we were admitted. He was accompanied by a beautiful Asian woman, to whom we were introduced as Yumi. She smiled and bowed to us.

"Please have a seat," said Felipe politely, yet coming from him it was more of a command.

We both sat on the couch side by side and politely waiting until he told us the reason for our presence. We thanked him for the giant teddy bear and he nodded at our words of thanks.

"I have been busy after our discussion about your family. You see, I have decided to have one of my own."

"Shut the fuck up" said Sookie and then looked abashed to have said that aloud.

Felipe only laughed at her language "Yes, in fact, Yumi is going to be the mother of my child, hence her presence here."

Our jaws dropped "Your Grace", I said as smoothly as possible. "You really, really don't want to mess with experimental fae magic, the results are most unpredictable." I said indicating Sookie's belly.

He threw his head back and laughed, "oh you thought? No, we are not doing that. My family tree is being researched and the most direct male descendant shall be offered a substantial amount of money for use of his sperm for the purposes of artificial insemination into Yumi's uterus. You've started quite a trend Northman."

"So it is going to be fashionable to for vampires to have families?" I was not sure that I like the idea of this.

"It could catch on, that is why I asked you here, I need a special favour from the both of you."

"What would that be?"

"I need for the two of you to agree to be interviewed by Vampire America. Your situation is too unique not to be shared with the world. You do not have to disclose Sookie's unusual heritage, but could simply say that you did as I am doing."

Sookie looked uneasy "why would you want us to?"

"People would have to know that vampires can make good parents and who better then the first actual family. We don't want child protection agencies swooping down every single time a child is born to a vampire and human couple."

Sookie nodded "I can see what you mean. I was often afraid of the same thing when Eric came back into my life, but so far everyone seems to have accepted our unique situation."

"Is this an order?" I said in a calm but dangerous tone of voice.

"No, but only a request. You may think it over and give me your answer before you leave."

He stood up and held out his arm to Yumi, she arose and took it. "Come my friends, it is time that we go to the ball. You are my honoured guest and shall be sitting at the head table with me."

"Yes, that is most generous, Your Grace, please let me know when we should tell our babysitter to bring Cameron so that he might be presented to the court" I took Sookie on my arm and all four of us departed for the ballroom and the safest way to secure the future of our family.


	34. Chapter 34

Hi there, what are you doing reading fan fic early Sunday afternoon when you should be doing your chores? Come on that floor isn't going to wash itself nor the toilet bowls. Hee hee, just bugging you. Enjoy. Obsidian

Karen-glad to hear that you are doing better. I didn't watch Buffy for SMG, but for Spike having hot vampire sex with her. James Masterson made the show and you know how I feel about blond hair. Yum. Sorry Eric, can we still be friends?

Btw-Yumi is a Japanese name pronounced You-Me, I was not trying to say she was Yummy.

******

Sookie and I were indeed expected to sit at the head table with Felipe and the soon-to-be pregnant Yumi. I was fairly comfortable there as I was used to being stared at but Sookie admitted under her breath that she felt on display. I told her that that was because we were.

Felipe went to order her a glass of champagne, which I helped her decline. Telling him that he will discover once his own companion becomes pregnant that they are forbidden to drink for the health of the baby, also that alcohol makes the milk bad for feeding them. I almost told him about the mood swings, their insatiable need for sex and strange craving, but then decided to let him find that out for himself. If he didn't remember from his own ten times. I was practically gloating over the answer he was going to have to give the first time he heard "honey does this make me look fat?"

Yumi and Sookie seemed to hit it off and she was giving her advice on the best way to deal with morning sickness in no time and showing pictures of Cameron to her. Including the baby-biting picture that we took the night I met him, she seemed alarmed and amused by that one at the same time.

Felipe asked me for news of John and I had to tell him that he returned to Florida to do damage control for his record label. Felipe seemed disappointed and asked for John's mailing address so that he could send him flowers; which I gleefully provided for him. Payback can be such a bitch.

I was served a wine glass full of Royal and Sookie had opted for apple juice as well as some chicken thing, which she declared was really good. Then Felipe taped on his wine glass to gain attention of those present.

"Thank you all for coming to celebrate my reign as King" he announced once he had everyone's attention.

Before the dancing portion of the evening commences, I would like to introduce you to a very unique couple in my realm. I present the Northmans, Sookie and Eric and their son Cameron." An appropriately dressed for once Allison brought Cameron in this sleeper that looked like tiny tuxedo which we had selected for the occasion. The room as awash with confused whispers.

"Sookie, could you please step forward" asked Felipe. I went with her not wanting her to feel too exposed and held her hand. "Mrs. Northman is pregnant with their second child. And I am planning to start a family myself." He said neatly diverting the attention away from us. He didn't disclose that I actually impregnated with my body (and probably would do again). But went on to explain about having his family tree research and obtaining sperm for the most direct descendant.

"This family is under my personal protection and any other children born to them" he declared and then asked if there were any questions. Most of the questions were kind of stupid and some of them made Sookie blush. They were many about if it was safe to drink from and expecting mother. But someone asked how you have sex with a pregnant woman. I just answered that one personally "You have sex with a pregnant woman the same way that you have sex with an unpregnant one." People laughed when I said this.

From there on we went to dance. People, well vampires kept on glancing at us as I waltzed her by. Some whispered congratulations in a tentative manner and I just gave them my sexiest grin.

I was being very attentive to her and for some reason that was turning her on. She whispered that we should return to the room for a quickie and I complied. I lay her on the bed and just simply took off her panties and shoved her dress up and took down my tuxedo pants. I rode her harder then normal and she squealed, loving every second of it. Then after we returned she was giggling and holding onto me.

Felipe asked if we were enjoying the ball and we honestly answered that it was one of the best ever and thanked him for the honour that he bestowed upon us.

I watched in bemusement and several vampires approached Allison in order to be personally introduced to Cameron and several appeared to want to play with him. He was him normally charming self and gurgled and smiled at all. Felipe even tangoed with him, which was funny. I honestly never thought that I would hear Felipe baby talking, but yet there he was! He presented him with a tin rattle with his name engraved on it. It was pretty but not very practical for so young a child.

Sookie was being asked to dance right, left and center and accepted some. She seemed to have to answer more personal question and was blushing so hard she was practically glowing. I quickly cut in when she shot me pleading looks.

Sookie started looking tired and took her back to our room and helped her and Cameron prepare for bed and gave her the present that I bought for her. A sapphire pendant necklace on a platinum chain. She asked what the occasion was and I simply said "for this" and pointed at Cameron "and for this" I said putting my hand on her belly.

She quirked an eyebrow at me and said "I have some sexual favours due right?"

"I am not dusting again" I retorted.

"Those are not the sort of favours I had in mind" she said with a sly grin and took her nightgown off.


	35. Chapter 35

Can someone work for me today, Sid is sleepy.

I caught you people not clean your house, tut tut. Seems I have to get my own whip out and come visit you. Obsidian.

******

The corvette came screeching around the turn almost flipping onto its side, the Porsche following it jocking for position on the narrow dirt road. At the last second the red corvette took a hair pin turn and fish tailed until the driver managed to get it under control. He drifted the car around the turn and it seemed to glide down the moonlight road with almost supernatural grace. The road widened and then the Porsche managed to overtake the Corvette, its engine shrieking like a hell hound.

Cursing the driver of the corvette did the only thing that he could think of and put the gas peddle to the floor and screeched up the over the bridge, launching his car over it. The corvette seemed to defy gravity and hung in the air gracefully until it came back to earth with a sickening crunch, it was a crude move but somehow the axel held true. It stopped at a certain point and screeched to a halt right before a tree that was marked with what looked curiously like a red woman's scarf. The Porsche screeched to the halt along side and both doors opened. "I win" cried Eric in triumph.

The owner of the Porsche stepped out of his car. He was a tall and slim with sandy blond hair "only just" he replied. He was a professional stunt car driver and he and Eric had met by accident one night and taken to drag racing together once in a while. His name was Carl. "If you ever want to give up the bar business, you should consider doing what I do. You are a natural."

Eric shook out his windswept long blond hair and said "I might consider it" he said with a happy smile. "See you tomorrow night; make sure you hide the eggs this time"

******

I pulled into the driveway at a more sedate pace and picked up the milk that I bought.

"You have been gone for a while" remarked a now six month pregnant Sookie.

"I was only gone for ten minutes" I said with a sly grin and spanked her lightly on the butt. "Miss me that much woman?"

"More like about an hour, but who is counting. Did you and Carl have a nice time?" Apparently nothing gets past my wife.

"Who me?" I said with an innocent expression on my face.

"Dada!" said Cameron in an excited tone of voice and ran up to me.

"Well, looks like someone managed to escape his crib again" I said scooping him up. "I told you that we need to put bars over top of it." He responded to that suggestion by yanking on my ears. "Enough of that Squirt" I admonished. "Sookie why do baby nails seem to be so sharp?"

"I file them that way just for you" she teased. "So what do you think of the name Prudence"

I winced at the thought of it "Why? Are you trying to name our daughter for virtues that I lack?"

"If I was trying to do that then I would call her Chastity. That one you probably never possessed"

"What can I say, I was a stud back then and I am still a stud.'

"If we are on the subject of virtues that you are lacking; I am throwing on the table Modesty as a possible name."

"Why aren't we a comedian tonight" I said in a sarcastic tone of voice.

"We got a letter, apparently our home is being invaded" said Sookie changing the subject.

"By what exactly? Poltergeist"

"Felipe and Yumi, apparently he feels that pregnant women need to be together and want to come for a visit."

My eyes went wide with the implications "The king, wants to come visit us and stay in our house. That's kind of cool actually."

"I find him to be a little weird" whined Sookie.

"Be that as it may, he is our king and I thought you liked Yumi."

"Dear one, he is your king, not mine. I do like Yumi, but he tries to hard. I don't like how he assumed that he was going to be the Uncle of our children without asking."

"He is an old vampire and he means well, just let him buy his little presents. He honestly likes Cameron." I soothed.

"I guess, it was not like you were insta Father either. So I suppose I can give him another chance."

"That's my girl and my other one too" I said noticing that Sookie's t-shirt suddenly bulged slightly at the belly. "Looks like Beanie is awake."

"Their father is a vampire; it is not too surprising that they come alive at night."

I let my fangs run out. So when are you growing your fangs kiddo?" I asked Cameron. He just giggled and reached up and touched one of mine.

"Don't even joke about that, I don't want to even think about trying to breastfeed a little fang-tooth baby. Not to mention how that would affect his learning to talk."

"Are you suggesting that fangs cause one to lisp?"

"Just the new ones, I am sure that you must have sounded great your first week. I th-ure you did" She said imitating a lisping vampire.

"Well I had more an accent back then so I suppose I might have sounded a little funny." I admitted. "Come on little nightmare, it is time to put you back to bed." I said and tucked Cameron into bed. He insisted on my singing to him so I sang "Pour Some Sugar on Me" until he fell asleep.

"Do you not know anything besides Def Leppard?" asked Sookie wanting to bug me.

"I don't like regular nursery rhythms, I feel like I my penis will fall off if I sing them."

"You have penis to spare, I think you will be fine" she assured me. That caused me to beam at her I like it when she remarks on how well endowed I am.

I heard a pop sound and turned to see Claudine framed in the nursery door.


	36. Chapter 36

Sid is very glad her boss is jewish and won't be here for most of the month of April. Whee!

I hate having to work, why can't I be independently wealthy. Obsidian

******

As soon as I saw I saw Claudine in our house, I went into defensive mode and curled my fingers into claws and could feel my fangs extend. Then I go a whiff of her and started advancing towards her drawn by her scent.

"Sookie tell Eric to back the fuck down, or I will stake him" commanded Claudine.

Sookie stood in front of me but glared at her friend. "Tell him yourself, if you have the guts.

"We need to get you and the babies away from here; it is not safe for you or them"

"I don't think so; he would never hurt any of us. It is the lying fairies that I worry about, not vampires" I was proud of her for standing her ground. She noticed that I was still advancing, a poor demented moth drawn helplessly to a flame. "Honey, why don't you go cut up the lemons for the pool party tomorrow night. Then bring one in here, we know how fairies like lemons" She suggested.

Knowing she was probably right, I retreated to the kitchen and started slicing one up, returning to the living room with a pitcher of iced tea to which I had just dumped the lemon slices into. "Would you girls care for a glass of iced tea I asked politely?" Claudine shuddered then said "no thanks"

I sat on the couch beside Sookie, forcing myself not to move, while Claudine sat on a chair.

"So talk!" commanded Sookie, Cameron was sitting on her lap pulled tightly against her and her facial expression would have suited a drill sergeant very well.

"Niall didn't want him involved and you know it."

"He should have thought of that before he made him their father then" she counted, her face was now completely shut down, and it eerily reminded me of well....me"

"You have no right to these children if you are going to endanger them like this"

"And you have no right to meddle in our lives. Niall is dead and although I wish it hadn't come to that, this shit is over with. It died when he did."

I was rather surprised to see Sookie being so forceful, that I decided to let her doing the talking for now.

"I could fix it that your husband be staked and your children vanish into the ether." Claudine threatened.

"But you won't or else every vampire I know shall come after you and quite frankly there are a lot more vampires then fairies. Not to mention one of them used to be a fairy and can lead them to where ya'll hang out" Sookie's charming southern accent suddenly didn't sound so charming.

"Fairies are more powerful then you think" pointed out Claudine.

"And vampires aren't?" I said baring my fangs at her.

"See? How can you say that he isn't father material? He is so protective of us." Sookie gushed. Claudine cringed at the sight of my smile.

"Sookie, I am your friend and am just doing what is best for you."

"No you're not, you are doing what you think is best for you. You were my friend and in a way I have you to thank for our children. But, it ends now, these are not your children nor your husband and you have no right to tell me what to do."

"I agree with Sookie, you are not welcome in our lives or in our home until you accept us as a couple."

"Cannot do that, Niall didn't want it this way"

"He is dead and no longer has any say in the matter, nor should you," leave commanded Sookie

"Sookie, I am your friend, can't you see that I am trying to help you!" begged Claudine.

"Do you want me to leave Honey?" Sookie asked of me.

"Of course not"

"Well I don't want to either, however there is someone here that should" she said looking at Claudine. "Especially, if they have screwed senses of values"

"Fine, just so you know that if I leave, I won't come back and I won't try and protect your children or grandchildren in the future."

"Now honey where are we going to find another long lived supernatural being to look after them then?" asked Sookie in an innocent voice.

"You're making a big mistake" warned Claudine.

"I rather doubt that, the way I understand it is that Niall was acting alone in his little breeding project right?" I asked.

Claudine smiled bitterly "So John told you that? I can't believe I slept with that asshole!"

Sookie mouthed at me 'her too'. I rolled my eyes and nodded, I was getting sick of running into people that he slept with. "Just answer the question."

"Yes" she answered.

"Would other fairies like the idea that one of their own kind found a way for vampires to reproducing. Imagine if our human children get intoxicated off of fae blood too."

Her eyes went wide with the implication.

"We will keep this to ourselves provided you leave now and never return." I said smoothly.

"Very well, I shall" and she vanished.

"I guess all fairytales must come to an end" I joked


	37. Chapter 37

Decided to speed things up a bit, I found that simply limping through chapters when I have little to say on the subject of small children was a boring write and I am sure a boring read for you. So, here is my newest one, Child Birth. Obsidian.

Jadajuice, don't worry Hon, I know you have a life.

******

It is towards the end of Sookie's pregnancy and Allison has moved in with us temporarily to help take care of the now walking and talking Cameron and monitor Sookie during the day in case she goes into labour while I am in death sleep.

I am honestly worried that this will happen and I shall wake up to an empty house with an irate wife across town in pain cursing the day that she met me. I have certainly given her reason in the past to curse and don't wish to repeat the cycle. Both of us worked hard to grow as people, so that we could finally meet eye to eye. Gone are the days that I try and control her; I merely just advise her and include her in all decisions that concern her or us.

I was in my office going over my receipts and spreadsheets, showing loss and profit in all of my business ventures; even the various stocks and bonds I have invented money into for my children when they come of age. I find these rows of numbers to be more interesting than the most compelling novel ever written, even one by Charlaine Harris (I am a fan of her work, her vampires stories remind me of myself).

I am most comfortable in this world of numbers; they talk to me, guiding my path through an ever changing world. I have the best accountants working for me, but prefer to review everything myself. I even balance household expenses to see what is going out of our accounts. I discovered through my explorations that Sookie is a thrifty shopper, she hardly even touches half of the money that I a lot to her on a weekly basis. I encourage her to spend and tell her that more shall be moved into the household account if it is needed, but she is not a big shopper and unless it is food or something needed for Cameron or for the new baby, she doesn't touch much.

The King and Yumi came and went for their personal visit that I shall touch on that more later. I was worried when the said he was going to be staying with us, that he would be dragging half of his court with him, but it was only the two of them and two body guards.

I was well into my thirtieth spread sheet doing calculations in my mind and enjoying what I was seeing. It is like the Fangtasia profits are flirting with me, demanding attention. Cameron was on the floor in front of my desk playing with a toy castle that Felipe brought him.

Suddenly, he looked up alarmed and said "Momma!" and started toddling for the door; his tiny hands trying to reach the door knob. I scooped him up and went to find Sookie.

She was standing beside the fridge in what appeared to be a puddle of water. For a second I thought that she had spilled a glass on the floor that she had been drinking. Then she looked up at me with alarmed eyes and said "Eric?"

I realized quickly what was going on and called Allison from her room and instructed her to bring the suitcase.

I watched as my wife grabbed her belly and moaned, taking her towards the car while Allison timed it for me. I didn't like to see her in pain, but knew I could do nothing to prevent this. I refused to be one of those unless husbands that seem to just run in circles while their wives needs help and support. I have always been a man of action, if I can calmly face battle,; I can certainly calmly face baby.

I put her in the corvette and let the speed limits be damned that night, any police that attempted to stop me would have been glamoured into thinking that they are goats and left there to graze on grass on the side of the road until the per set time limit was reached.

I called Pam on the way there to let her know and heard her squealing happily on the other end. I never would have pegged her for the maternal sort, but vampires and humans often surprise me. Even myself; ask me a couple years ago if I would ever even allow myself to be in the situation of driving my pregnant wife to the hospital to have our baby and I would have said "hell no" and gone to fuck my latest girl du jour.

We got to the hospital in record time and got her checked into the private room that we reserved. As I was her Lamaze coach I was expected to wear scrubs, I felt kind of stupid in them and knew that I couldn't contaminate the sterile room, but didn't want to not be allowed to attend the birth because I thought I was too cool for scrubs. So I put them on, even the hair net. Sookie when she saw me started laughing at the me before she slipped back into another labour pain. I commented that her hospital gown didn't look much better. She did not take offence, but the nurse beside her did. So I was given a stern lecture on being supportive of my wife; while Sookie looked on smugly.

I coached her through her breathing, no longer glad that I got to witness with miracle of child birth and sighed with relief when the epidural as put in and the pain was almost gone. She had a fairly smooth delivery as far as the doctor was concerned and it was one of the rare incidents where the birth was over in four hours. She had told me that Cameron had been 18 hours and I berated her for not calling for me through the bond. My fangs did run out and alarmed the staff, but the doctor had been instructed that this would happen and told them all to be calm.

When our daughter was born she was 6 lbs. 8 oz. and really pretty once they rinsed the gunk off her. They handed her to Sookie who started to cry and asked if I minded the name Charlotte; that became her name Charlotte Prudence Northman.

When they handed her to me and she opened her eyes for the first time, I can't think what she might have thought to see a pale fanged smiling face, framed by long blond hair, hovering over her own. But she didn't seem alarmed as she grabbed onto my finger, shifted in my arms and went back to sleep.

It was only after as I was driving home for my own day rest when I realized that Cameron knew about Sookie's labour before I, with my vampiric hearing, heard anything.


	38. Chapter 38

Short chapter today, hungover. Ouch, two 5 ft. 2" women and a bottle of white, a bottle of red and a bottle of champers are not a good combination. Mind you it was fun she played what I have come to know as her Sid CD, it is a combination of The Romanes, Alice Cooper, jazz standards and The Andrews Sisters. I swear it is great to have a friend with the same taste in music as me. And equally geeky.

******

I was wearing just a pair of jeans as I had just gotten out of the shower after making love to Sookie, who is now feeding Charlotte. I got to feel experience what a condom felt like for the first time; quite simply, it stunk. I loath the damned things now with a passion.

I couldn't even figure out how to put it on at first and fumbled with it like a teenaged virgin and even put in on inside out so I couldn't roll it down. Eventually Sookie had to help me, which was rather humiliating. I could tell she was struggling not to laugh at my ineptitude

When I finally penetrated her, rather then feeling her slick hot walls gripping me as normal, all I felt was the awful rubber sheath and a slight hint of her warmth, other then that, nothing. "Vampires are not meant to wear condoms" I said what was probably a whiny tone of voice. "That was horrible!"

"Thanks" she remarked. "I love you too" she said in a sarcastically.

"That is not what I meant; I barely got off with that that torture device on. Please tell me that human males do not have to wear those every time?"

"Quit pouting. Yes, some males never experience the feeling of au natural as you have been enjoying for over one thousand year."

"Poor human males, I am actually feeling sympathy for them now. How long before you can go on the pill"

"Why honey, don't you think we should try again right away?" she said indicating towards Charlotte, who moved her hand as if she was waving to me.

"No thanks, I say we wait another year or so"

"I am just teasing you; I can go on the mini pill which contain progestin only and is recommended for breastfeeding mother as it doesn't affect the milk"

"Sounds good to me. Are you going on them soon?" I said in a hopeful tone of voice.

"I'll call to make the appointment tomorrow" she promised.

She went to put Charlotte in the revised nursery, Cameron now had his own room next door and had moved all the pandas in there with him. Charlotte's theme was sea horses, which is apparently gender neutral enough for a girl. Sookie made me paint them on the wall, I now loath them with their smug smiley faces.

The door opened and Cameron came in. He stared at Sookie and then nodded and grabbed my hand to lead me somewhere. "Where is he taking me?"

"He just asked me if he could have a cookie and I told him that you would get it for him"

"Sookie, from now on talk out loud. No one but the three of us are supposed to know about this."

Flashback

Once I got home from the hospital to find that Cameron was still awake and asked for Allison's help. I got out the flash cards with simple images that he might recognize and tried projecting my own thoughts to him. This didn't seem to work, so I asked Allison to try. I showed her the cards on by one for her to project that word of that image to him and asked Cameron what he was hearing.

The first one was of a red ball.

Allison thought the word _ball._

"Son what is Allison saying to you?" I asked.

He clapped his hands as if he was enjoying this game and said "ball"

The got the next one right and the one after that. In fact he got all of them right.

"That is freaky" commented Allison, "it is like he is reading my mind" she said in a shrewd sounding voice. "He is isn't he?"

"He appears to be telepathic like his mother" I mused out loud. "You can't tell anyone about this"

"Hey don't worry man, I work with supe children, this is hardly the freakiest thing that I have ever seen. You should have met this one little brat who would only eat slugs. It was the grossest thing you ever saw."

"Yes, I see that you are terribly good at keeping a secret" and got ready to glamour her.

"Forget it" she said crossing her arms and staring into my eyes. "I can't be glamoured, you are not the first vampire to try"

"Really? Who has tried in the past" I was now curious.

"My friend Harold he liked to glamour people into thinking they were duck at parties."

I got to thinking about how I had selfishly kidnapped Sookie's life when I discovered about her own talent and resolved that no one was going to do that to Cameron as long as I was walking the Earth. Yes, I used to be a jerk at one point; it wasn't like I was in love with her back then or her babies' daddy.


	39. Chapter 39

Had to write this on between stupid assignments, not liking today. I need a beer. Anyone want to join me, my treat? Obsidian

Btw-fantasypainter, I do love merlot and am not a fan of white wine but am partially allergic to red, even one glass gets me drunk so only have it on rare occasion. I am also allergic to scotch and I am Scottish. Go figure. Annoyed Sid. I'll see if I can make it to Oklahoma but don't normally leave Canada. Thanks for asking, I always love meeting other geeks :)

******

Sookie said that she wasn't feeling well so I opted to stay home from Fangtasia. When I heard her throwing up I went to check being concerned for her. "Sookie, are you pregnant again?" I asked dreading the answer. I had started associating the sounds of nausea with pregnancy.

She came out of the washroom walking in a slightly wobbly way as if she was drunk. "No I think that I have the flu" she said in a slightly softer voice then normal and hugged me. Even though the thin fabric of my t-shirt I could feel that her temperature was higher then normal and she looked pale and sweaty.

The flu? I didn't have a clue what that was and told her so. So she explained and that she _wasn't allowed around our children while she has it as it is contagious! _

"What about feeding Charlotte?" I asked her. "I can feed Cameron but not Charlotte as I can't produce milk because I don't have those" I said pointing to her ample breasts. She told me that she would express it but I would have to feed it to her. I agreed and called Allison to see if she would help.

"Allison would you be available for the next week or so? Sookie has the flu and I need help" I inquired politely

"Sure tomorrow, I have a date tonight"

"Is there no way that you can start tonight? I will double your normal wages" I suggested. Hey I had two small children and a sick wife to take care of; desperate time require desperate measures.

"Sorry champ, I just bought a very expensive dress for the occasion and the guy is hot" she said and then she hung up. I growled a bit and wondered briefly if her dress should not have probably been free as I doubt there is too much to it.

I was now not sure what to do and for once wish that I had gone out of my way to cultivate friendships with humans who _don't_ have to sleep during the day. So in a panic first I called Pam and then Sam. Sam insisted on driving over right away. He volunteered to stay with Sookie and until Allison arrived the next morning

Pam had babysat before but seemed unsure what to do with so young a baby until I explained to her that it was just like before and then the next thing yeu know she was cooing and feeding the baby like a demented Mary Poppins. Of course Cameron wanted in to the action so when I wasn't checking on Sookie; I would find Cameron sleeping with his head on Pam's lap while she fed Charlotte. It looked very sweet and slightly disturbing at the same time; just because it was Pam after all.

Sam showed up a couple of hours later with seemed to have the entire flu section of a drug store loaded into his car. I remembered that some over the counter drugs weren't good for a nursing mother so I looked up each one online prior to giving any of them to her.

I took her temperature and was informed by Sam that it was too high for a human and on inspiration I removed her nightgown and bathed her with a cold cloth and then covered her with a light blanket as it was a warm night. She seemed to be soothed by my cool skin so I removed my shirt and held her against my breast until she fell asleep.

After she had some aspirin and some flu medication this seemed to knock her out and I was glad that she keeps the fridge stocked with breast milk just in case.

Yes, so that was how the night was spent. Two vampires and a shifter taking care of three humans. Not the usual crew that you would chosen as nurses but not better then nothing.

Once the kids were put back in bed I thanked my helpers. Pam by giving her a blood and for Sam I ordered pizza, which kind of backfired because it was heavy on the garlic and bothered both Pam and I. However Cameron woke and demanded his share. We let him have a little piece then had to brush his teeth several times to get rid of the smell.

I don't think we shall have pizza in our place again, it really was most unpleasant. I can just imagine if they start to rebel as teenagers by eating copious amounts of garlic, but I will cross that bridge when I get to it.

Pam eventually went home and Sam and I spent the rest of the night looking after the helpless ones.

Just as I was about to turn in for the day I heard Sookie vomiting and Sam was looking after her. "I reall,y really hope that Allison gets here soon" was my last conscious thought.

I guess this is a further reason why vampires are not suited for parenthood. We just aren't morning people.


	40. Chapter 40

I guess that no one really liked the SM scene in yesterday's P/J; I couldn't resist throwing it in. Flogging scenes are something I do at my other job, they are fun but don't lead to me having sex with clients. More like getting cha-ching, fun amusing way to earn extra cash. Obsidian :)

******

Sam was still there when I awoke and assured me that Sookie was feeling a little better. I told him that I appreciated him his concern and asked him if Allison had showed up. He explained that that was the reason why he remained. He wanted to find out from me that she actually was our babysitter. I wasn't certain why he seemed so taken a back by her until I saw what she had on.

Her hair was teased into long roll spikes and she wore a tiny bitty mini skin with hot pink and black striped tights underneath, and a brief cropped tank top exposing her fish white belly and her skull pieced navel, not to mention her black bra straps.. This outfit was completed with hot pink pumps and black lipstick. She smiled at me in a friendly manner and I foresaw another talk about dressing appropriately for her role as nanny to our children, which would end with her calling me a fuddy duddy. They normally did.

I assured Sam that despite appearances that she was very competent and our children loved her. I then asked why he couldn't simply ask Sookie to vouch for her. He explained that she had a fever so he wanted to make sure the she wasn't being delusional before leaving her in the hands of Elvira Mistress of the Dark. So he explained he wished to wait for confirmation from me before departing. However I did notice that he seemed to be sporting a fresh hickey on his neck and had black lipstick on his collar.

I went over in my head all the females of the house and knew Sookie didn't own black lipstick and Charlotte was too young to wear any. This left only Allison and decided that I was going to have to add acting appropriately as well as dressing appropriately to our 'fuddy duddy' talk. Hmmm, perhaps I should add don't call your boss a fuddy duddy while I was at it.

Sam left while Allison gazed longingly after him and whispered what sounded suspiciously like "what a hunk"

I went to see Sookie, who had been asleep when I awoke and was treated to the sight of Cameron crying and trying to get into the room but couldn't as he was being restrained by Allison. Sookie and he seemed to be having some sort of silent conversation. I decided to take charge of the situation and took him and built a fort out of all of the couch cushions that we could find and appropriated the cookie jar from the kitchen to distract him. When asked what we should pretend to hide from he replied "vampires"

"Son, I am a vampire" I explained to him "why would you need to hide from me?" I asked. So he explained that when he played this game with Allison she had the enemy as being vampires. This caused me on adding that to our discussion list for later.

After he tired of the game and ate all the cookies, I went to see Sookie again and asked how she felt. She discussed herself as feeling like she was run over by a mac truck and dragged behind it for a few miles to boot. I told her that I was glad that she was feeling better then helped her pump milk which lead of other things. I told her that I would understand if she didn't wish to but apparently she did. We were interrupted by Cameron knocking at the door and insisting on finding out what mommy and daddy were doing. Until Allison dragged him away informing him that we were doing parent stuff that he would understand later on in life.

That kind of killed the mood; I do not want to have to think about my children having sex, especially not Charlotte. If she ends up looking like Sookie in any way I will have to follow her around with my sword when she hits puberty.

Which opened a whole other can of worms mentally at the though of Supe men being attracted to Charlotte the same way that they are to Sookie. Could I actually agree to let her date shifters or even other vampires with hundreds of years of sexual experience compared to my short lived innocent daughter? When I expressed these fears to Sookie. She laughed and said I was being premature; she can't even talk yet and there are years before she starts to date.

Pam showed up with orange juice and chicken soup saying that Dear Abby recommended bringing both these items to sick human women. Sookie thanked her and I went to heat the soup for her. Amazingly she managed to keep it down.

Pam also informed me that John had insisted on helping her run Fangtasia so I could remain with Sookie as much as I wanted. I asked if she thought he would be competent in this role and she assure me that her husband had always been successful business wise. I still kind of shivered when she used the word husband; it just seemed too weird coming from her. Especially when she gets an oddly tender smile when she said that. Again ITS PAM for gods sake! That and it was hard to picture John being the husband in any relationship.

So I resolved to stay home tonight and help out after all I have cookies to bake, if Sookie were to find out that I let Cameron eat them all she would stake me.


	41. Chapter 41

Here is the latest, I have to run I have a birthday party to attend and promised to make a green salad with miniature potatoes. Obsidian

Could someone explain to me why when I am trying to channel Eric to see how he would sound saying certain dialogue, I always picture him a with a cigarette his mouth? He doesn't smoke on the show in the books.

******

After Sam dropped Allison off in front of our house the next night and they practically started fucking in the front seat of his truck in their efforts to say goodbye to each other. I was just on the point of going to retrieve the garden hose to separate them like how you do dogs in heat, when she opened the door to his truck and slithered out while pulling her minimal skirt down. I gave Sam a look of disapproval and at least he had the decency to look embarrassed. What is it about babysitters wanting to hump in our house?

"Allison, may I speak to you for a moment." I asked and led her into my office.

"What is the problem Chief?"

I sat back on the chair at my desk and steeped my fingers under my chin, the full picture of authority. Normally most vampires in my retinue get nervous when they see me assume this position. However, Allison appeared nonplussed." Well for one thing I would rather be referred to as Mr. Northman or Eric if you wish to be informal."

"Got it ch….Eric. Well I have to check in on Sookie and see to the children" she turned to go.

"We are not done here yet," I said in a voice that would have cut glass. "Allison, your resume is impressive and your references impeccable. I am considering offering you the job as our full time nanny, but things have to change.

"If this is about Sam…"

I cut her off "Sam Merlotte is an intelligent, hard-working individual and as far as shifters go, he is a good guy. I owe him for my marriage, in fact and he would probably be a good influence on you. His only real fault is his blindness when it comes to women. He frequently makes bad choices. He tends to stay away from his own kind and goes a tad crazy for any female shifter who will have him as result. That being said I have no objection to you dating him _on your own time_." I finished. "I trust that I won't be a witness to anymore of your lewd goodbyes again like I just did?"

"Well aren't you a fuddy duddy?"

"Ah, the infamous phrase. I don't think it is a question of being old fashioned; in fact I am not. You can fuck anyone you want, especially Sam, he could probably use a good screw." I said bluntly. "It is a question of having certain expectations when it comes to employees, I have met other people's nannies and they don't look like bad strippers" I eyed her leather micro mini skirt and three differently cut cropped tank tops that she wore. She flinched when I said this.

"How dare you say I look like a stripper!" she exploded.

"Why does the truth hurt? You chose a career as a caregiver to young children, yet your choice of clothing hardly screams that. In fact they scream "would you like a lap dance?" You make some of the fang-bangers from my bar look like they are dressed like nuns."

"What the hell do you know?"

"I know that I am new to fatherhood, but I do know that my children should not have someone's sexuality shoved into their faces. They are not going to have a normal childhood as it is. They have a last count one-vampire aunt, two shifter uncles and two vampire uncles. They are going to be exposed to some seriously weird shit as they grow, so I want their upbringing to be as normal as possible." I had a momentary vision of Charlotte growing into a Sookie-like teenager and John picking her up as her prom date. I shivered slightly and this image and suppressed it.

"So you have a problem with my clothes"

"And your attitude, you should be more respectful of the one who signs your pay cheques; me. I don't have a problem with you being familiar with me, but not to the point of it being insulting. I am not a fuddy duddy, I am a father who wishes to protect his children and you should respect that."

"I can understand that. So you want me to stop wearing so much black?"

"Wear as much black as you want, just wear more of it. Causal clothes that don't allow my son a gynecological lesson every time he looks up. No leather, no pvc, no black lipstick and if you want to fuck; you do it far away from here. I may be a vampire but this is my home, I have to live in this neighbourhood, my children will grow up here and attend schools nearby. Therefore I can't have the neighbours thinking that I am running a brothel. In fact if you don't have causal clothing, I am willing to take you shopping for some."

"Why would you do that for me?" she asked.

"I would because, I like you, Sookie likes you and the kids love you that and you accepted our unique situation without question. I am willing to give you a chance and employ you on a full time basis if you are interested."

"So the rules are clothes that aren't too sexy, no sexing on the premises and no talking down to you?"

I nodded, "that is it in a nutshell" I held out a piece of paper to her. "Here is the amount I am willing to offer you and hours that I would need you available. This includes benefits and health insurance too. Are you interested?"

"Heck, for this amount, I would show up in a burlap sack everyday if you insisted. You have yourself a nanny, Mr. Northman.

"Good, please go check on Sookie, she still has the flu but seems to be getting better and ask her if she has some clothing for you to wear today until we can get you properly dressed. Finally, if you are unsure about if an outfit is appropriate, text me a picture of it and I will let you know." She trotted off to see to Sookie and the children and I had a moment of satisfaction that I had just won a battle.


	42. Chapter 42

Update late, Bad Sid, sorry finding it harder to find new things to write about in this story. I don't want to bore you. Might have to switch back to update one of the previous ones for a while. I just can't write about children. Nothing to say ARGHHHHHH! Obsidian

******

Sookie and I were in the bedroom with the door closed and had been wrapping presents while Allison was minding the children; this why people have nannies.

We had wrapped a couple presents and I decided to take a quick shower. I was only in for about a minute when I felt someone join me.

"Thought I needed to take a shower too" said Sookie, she was wonderfully naked and I took full advantage of that.

"Let me guess are you having dirty thoughts or just need me to clean your back?" I said in my sexiest voice striking a pose that allowed my body to bulge in all the correct places and I do mean all of them.

"A little of both" she said and picked up the bar of soap. "Shall I wash the glorious plenty first?" Needing no for encouragemen,t she washed me very thoroughly and maddeningly slow until I was fully aroused.

I slipped my fingers into her and she gasped. "You like that?" Her little mewling sound was enough of a confirmation.

After I teased her orally I leaned her against the shower door and slipped myself into her with a little maneuvering because of the height difference.

Just then we heard Cameron hammering on the door. "Da? Momma?"

I turned off the water and sighed "Sookie it sounds like your son is up and we will have to continue this later."

"My son? Oh so he is ours until he annoys you? Let me explain it takes _two _people to make a baby again....."

It is Cameron's first birthday party and for some reason Sookie insisted that we get a clown. I have never been a fan of the things and am resisting the urge to punch him. His annoying antics and the horn he uses make it highly tempting to and I don't believe that I am the only one present who wishes to do so. Sam also seems to be irritated by him as well.

All of the various uncles and aunts were in attendance that would be Aunt Amelia, Aunt Pam, Uncle John, Uncle Sam, Uncle Jason and Even Uncle Felipe managed to make an appearance bringing with him Aunt Yumi and 'Cousin' Midori, his baby daughter. He seemed pretty happy and looked like he was a good father. "There are now five human vampire couples planning to have children as I did" he told me proudly.

I congratulated him because I really didn't know what to say. Felipe's mind works in mysterious ways.

"So what was Cameron's first word" he asked conversationally.

"Da da," I was pretty happy that he chose me as his first word. Sookie was a little miffed.

Felipe seems to have given up his pursuit of John; I think it might be because of how he and Pam seemed to be joined at the lip, so he probably gave up eventually.

Allison and Sam seem to be a couple of sorts , the fact that he is about twelve years older then her is a little alarming, but considering the age difference between Sookie and I; I am hardly one to talk. They were both on their best behaviour but seemed to give each other sly, hungry glances from time to time. I remember all to well about new couple sex. Not that my sex life has ever deceased in the least. Especially now that Sookie is on the pill and we don't have to deal with condoms anymore.

Cameron seems to be enjoying his day and likes the attention he is receiving not to mention the amount of presents that he is getting and I am trying to prevent him from tearing them all open without the presenter on the premises.

I am mystified at the amount of screaming, shrieking babies that are attending this party lead by my own son, who is some kind of rug rat ringleader of the whole thing. It seems like you are just trying to sort up a heap of them then there is another pile of babies to sort through. It seems like they are breeding while they are here. I keep checking to make sure that that baby doors are in place in case they get into restricted areas. I am also trying to limit the access of the parents to the basement as I imagine it is one thing to know that I am a vampire without seeing the old clique of vampire coffins stored in the basement.

Towards the end of the party the creepy clown has been dismissed, the cake eaten and the crowd of munchkins dispatched to points unknown.

At that point it was just shifters and vampires left and Allison took the kids to bed.

The adults stayed in the living room contentedly while Sookie and I went to talk.

"That was so much fun, just think our first child's birthday party together"

"It was a little overwhelming" I thought.

She started laughing at me "so the great Eric Northman is intimated by a child's birthday party. Well, guess what? You have many, many more of these two endure, that is one per child and let's not discount the fact we are thinking about having more"

"I think it was a lot easier to be a sterile vamp, I used to be"


End file.
